


You Only Live Twice

by ellieoh



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Billy Hargrove & Maxine "Max" Mayfield Bonding, Billy Hargrove Lives, Billy Hargrove Needs a Hug, Billy Hargrove is soft for (1) boy, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Blow Jobs, Bottom Billy Hargrove, Bottom Steve Harrington, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Explicit Sexual Content, Good Babysitter Steve Harrington, Hand Jobs, I ain’t got time for that shit, Jim "Chief" Hopper Lives, M/M, Possessive Billy Hargrove, Post-Season/Series 03, Recovery, Robin and Jonathan ship it, Roommates, Soft Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Has a Big Dick, Steve Harrington’s got Big Feelings about Billy Hargrove, Top Billy Hargrove, Top Steve Harrington, Very little angst tbh, everything is the same just modern, friendship is a big ship here, i don’t make the rules, post Upside Down, they’re soft for each other, this is mostly Steve & Billy learning to trust each other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:01:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 63,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23823499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellieoh/pseuds/ellieoh
Summary: Summer went on like that and it was normal. Until it wasn’t.Because of course it couldn’t stay normal.Because this was Hawkins. Because if the last two years taught him anything, it was that nothing stays normal for long.So, Starcourt happens and it’s bad. Like, really bad.And, Hopper had… an idea. One he’s presenting to them now. One Steve really would’ve liked to have heard prior to walking into this room.Hop wants Steve to get an apartment and he wants Billy to live there.or,Billy survives Starcourt and becomes roommates with Steve.
Relationships: Billy Hargrove/Steve Harrington
Comments: 70
Kudos: 309





	1. or so it seems

**Author's Note:**

> Big thanks to my best pal, Shelby, who’s obsessed with Harringrove and dragged me here. This is absolutely for her, but I so enjoyed writing! Steve & Billy are wildly interesting characters to play with. 
> 
> So, for some reason I didn’t realize that Nancy & Jonathan were younger than Steve? I went back and rewatched season two, but I’d already written this so, whoops? Nancy & Jonathan are Steve’s age, Billy & Robin are still in school, my bad.
> 
> This is a lot of Steve & Billy working through post-Starcourt drama to trust each other. And a lot of them with the kids because I live for that shit. Also, Hopper’s alive because I don’t have time for that drama. Next chapter should be up soon!
> 
> Anyway, come scream at me on tumblr! @ellieohno

Post the night at the Byers, Billy takes his sweet fucking time, but eventually apologizes to Steve.

It wasn’t like Steve was exactly expecting an apology from a guy like Hargrove – who’d been such an asshole from the moment he rolled into town with his obnoxious car and his even worse attitude, he was like the walking definition of _bad touch_. He knew better than to think someone like him would apologize for getting too rough.

The fight between them had been brutal, but Steve went on about his life after the gate closed like Hargrove didn’t exist because he wasn’t expecting anything from him.

But, then he does. Apologizes.

Walks up to Steve after class one day, face already healing up, and apologizes for the plate cause _that was a shit move_. Steve mostly accepts it because he was in like, shock or something, but doesn’t actually forgive him.

Why would he? The guy was a fucking _menace_ , one sort of apology for one instance within an entire goddamn brawl wasn’t getting Steve on his knees, y’know?

So he accepts Billy’s apology, says _thank you for apologizing,_ and moves on about his day. The anger that rises every time he sees Hargrove’s stupid face doesn’t dissipate, though it does dampen over time. He still ignores Billy and his smarmy grins and his ridiculous posturing and essentially gives him the cold shoulder. Refusing to participate in his general vibe.

The text comes through late one night, later than someone normal getting up at six am for school should be sending. He wasn’t even sure how Billy had gotten his number, because Steve sure as shit hadn’t given it to him. But he was Billy Hargrove and someone like Tommy probably fucking gave it to him.

_Look._ The text had started – just as aggressive as Hargrove was in real life. _I’m sorry about that night. It’s come to my attention my apology wasn’t “sufficient” enough, so sorry that I roughed you up and scared the kids. Alright?_

Well… alright.

That was certainly more than he’d ever expected.

So, even if it was Max who put him up to it, and even though it didn’t justify Billy’s actions, it seemed like Billy was actually trying – or at least making as much of an effort as Billy can. Its in that moment Steve realizes that Jonathan had also bashed in his face once upon a time – and stole his girlfriend – and they were basically best friends now. So, he forgives Billy.

_Okay._ He texts back. _I accept your apology. But put another hand on me or my kids and I’ll lay you out for real._

The reply came much later, when Steve was finally exhausted enough to close his eyes without his mind racing.

_Alright, pretty boy. Message received._

They don’t really interact before the apology, and honestly they don’t immediately talk all that much after.

Not until summer break, not until Steve had graduated and got declined from every college he’d had Nancy and Jonathan and Dustin, and hell, even _Billy_ , help him apply to, and started slinging ice cream at the mall with Robin.

Before summer, post apology, Billy was hesitant to take up as much space in Steve’s life as he had before – rightfully so.

Max had put him in his place that night, Steve solidifying that by not partaking in his bullshit after. But, Steve wouldn’t say that it wasn’t weird to have Billy all distant and broody.

Billy had lingered on the fringes of Steve’s day-to-day, not ignoring him but not really engaging either. A nod here, an instagram like there, it was nothing like the punishing assault it’d been pre-night at the Byers’ house – where every day had been Billy at his back in Basketball, growling in his ear, shoulder-checks in the hallway with sharp smirks thrown his way.

Eventually, it started to bother Steve that Billy was smothering himself – because that’s what it was.

Billy was like the sun; bright, hot, constant. This wilted flower version was something that annoyed Steve, though he couldn’t really say why, exactly.

So, Steve sat across from him at the picnic table in the courtyard during lunch one day and pushed his latest college essay toward him and said – “Nancy tells me that you’re in her AP English class and she’s tired of looking over my essays, so…”

Billy looked a bit shocked from where he was still holding his phone, looking from Steve to the essay, before picking it up and sighing dramatically. “Alright, pretty boy, let’s see how shit this thing really is if little miss priss didn’t want to work on it anymore.”

Steve had rolled his eyes but didn’t contradict him. It was shit, they all knew it.

But, that had kind of been the extent of their interactions before summer.

Billy helped Steve with essays and applications during lunch or free periods as a sort of truce. They harassed each other on the basketball court, then the baseball field when the season ended. Billy wrote mean things on his instagram pics, and occasionally shot the shit while waiting for the kids at the arcade or the mall.

They weren’t _friends_ , but they weren’t mortal enemies anymore either. They existed in that weird in-between of civility and friendship; less than adversaries, more than acquaintances.

It was odd. All the kids thought it was odd. But, Billy was still a punk, especially to Max, so he got why they thought that. It was nice not fighting with the guy, though; nice not having to constantly watch his back; nice to have Billy at least a little bit on his side.

And then, Steve graduated, and didn’t get into literally any of the colleges he applied to, and then got into a huge fight with his dad who basically told him to get a fucking job and figure out his life.

So, he started working at Scoops, met Robin, was basically convinced she was the coolest person in their town, and tried not to be devastated that everyone was moving on around him.

Everyone except Billy Hargrove. Who was a year below him in school, like Robin, and wasn’t leaving come September.

Billy, who hadn’t given him that sad, pitied look when Steve had told him _thanks for all the help, Hargrove, but the essays didn’t make much difference_.

He’d looked at Steve a bit softer than he had maybe ever, but socked Steve in the arm while smoking a cigarette. _Sucks, Harrington. But at least you’re still pretty._ Which, had just been _so_ Billy Hargrove and that’d made Steve laugh.

So, he’d have the kids, and he’d have Robin, and he guessed, maybe he’d have Billy.

That thought stuck more and more especially after Billy had come into the mall – solely to taunt him, Max had told him so – at the beginning of the summer, saw Steve in his uniform for the first time, actually laughed out loud and took a photo.

The photo in question – Steve standing behind the counter, dead faced, in his uniform, flipping Billy off with both hands – had made it to the famed Billy Hargrove instagram.

Billy’s instagram was notorious. He had more followers than literally _anyone_ around _,_ and that included his time as _King Steve_ and “Juicy” Jocelyn Castiello. But, it was also very strictly Billy and his daily dumpster fire of a life. The only non Billy/thirst trap photos were pics of the Camaro, old photos from Cali, one of Max looking like an actual gremlin, a super vague post about his mom from a couple years ago, and now Steve.

The caption, of course, had read: _about to get me a double scoop (ice cream emoji) pretty boy is back in business, get in line ladies_

Steve had almost killed him.

He wouldn’t lie – literally only to himself and absolutely no one else – the comment had made his cheeks warm a little and a small smile play at his lips.

Billy was… Billy.

To say he was attractive was putting it _mildly_ and Steve had always known he swayed in any direction that pleased him. Not many other people knew that, but whatever, he didn’t have to justify himself to anyone.

Too bad Billy’s attitude and general personality were so fucking obnoxious. That and the fact that Steve pretty positive that Billy was majorly hetero.

Which is what made him pause when reading the caption, because there was a hint of… _something_.

Something that Steve noticed from time to time, like the over indulgence of _pretty boy_ and _princess,_ and Billy’s absolute obsession with “King Steve”.

But, then he thought of all the girls Billy went out with, all the sloppy makeouts at parties and filthy musings in the locker room.

So, probably pretty hetero. Though, not a homophobe – which had been a really big surprise when Steve had found out, because that just seemed like something that would be Billy’s deal.

But, nope. Rodney Collins once called Steve a _fucking_ _queer_ for kissing another guy during a party game and Billy had legitimately raged out on the fucker. Screamed about how it was the _2010s_ , how he was sick of this backwoods town, as he roughed the guy up.

Billy Hargrove might be a raging asshole who picked fights and whored around and was mean to kids, but he wasn’t a homophobe. So, there was that.

Then Steve brought the kids to the pool, which, _sigh_ – you know?

It should be fucking _illegal_ for someone who looked like Billy to go gallivanting about in swim shorts that small, all tanned and oiled and – it was just fucking _rude._

Heather had just rolled her eyes at him and snapped her gum and told him to keep an eye on his brats. God, he had no idea why Robin had a crush on her, she was so damn mean. But, he wouldn’t say that out loud because then Robin would narrow her eyes and talk about pot and kettles and Steve just didn’t have time for that, okay? He had a blank future to plan.

So, summer went like that. Wanting to gouge his eyes out at the pool. Ignoring Robin’s _You Suck_ column. Letting Billy Hargrove sample too many flavors of ice cream and annoy the shit out of him. Meet up with Nance and Jonathan to get coffee and talk about how much they hated their lives. Pretty normal.

Until it wasn’t.

Because _of course_ it wasn’t. Of course it _couldn’t_ stay normal.

Because this was Hawkins. Because if the last two years taught him anything, it was that nothing stays normal for long.

So, Starcourt happens.

Which… is bad.

Like, _really bad_.

Like, they all almost _die_ more than usual bad.

Like… Billy actually _did_ die for a moment bad.

Steve had been drugged, beaten, terrorized, and attacked. Some of which, by Billy – which, kind of shouldn’t be new? Except Billy wasn’t really like that anymore and was covered in black veins, which should’ve tipped them off sooner.

Max had been the one to say to him after everything, before Owens brought them in and told them Billy was alive. Said that Steve should’ve noticed it sooner.

And… maybe he should’ve.

They weren’t friends, but they weren’t the _farthest_ thing from friends anymore either. Which, may have been the closest thing Billy had to a friend. To someone who cared about him.

And wasn’t that just absolutely heartbreaking.

Steve hadn’t noticed. Because he’d been working at the mall with Robin, and Dustin had just gotten home from summer camp, and the kids were sick of the pool, and Billy didn’t actually come into Scoops all that often.

Nancy had told him that Max was just scared, and upset, and angry, that it hadn’t actually been his responsibility, that he couldn’t have known.

It made him feel better and worse all at once.

But, then Billy’s alive. Not _okay_ , but alive.

Steve’s face was once again fucked up and he was pretty sure that he’s gonna end up with that type of head injury that athletes get from getting smacked around too often. They all look worse for wear, but drop everything the moment they find out where Billy is.

They visit him in the hospital, he looks like shit. Broken and battered and _scarred_.

The kids all pile around him, Max at his side, teeth bared like a guard dog, keeping the rest of them from getting out of hand. Steve had went up with them, because that was just a thing he did now – follow after the kids like a mother hen – but Nancy and Jonathan had stayed downstairs with Joyce and Robin.

Owens had pulled Hopper aside to go over medical charts all suspicious like, and tells him when Billy will finally be released three months later, he won’t be allowed to go back home.

At first they thought it was because of Owens and the Upside Down and the _black goo_ , but then Hop pulls him aside from everyone and tells him the truth. Because he wants Steve’s help. Because they think Billy will respond to it better if he has a _friend_ around.

Steve wanted to choke on the word, wants to tell Hop that he’s not Billy’s friend, that Billy probably wouldn’t want Steve there for any of this. But doesn’t, because he’s curious, because he sort of _wants_ to be Billy’s friend.

So he follows Hop and Max back into the weird government hospital and listens while he tells Billy what Dr. Owens had showed him in the medical charts – _old breaks, poorly set fractures, a telling psych eval, hospital records from California_. He won’t be going back to that house, because Billy is a hero, and no one should be abused by their dad.

Billy had been quiet the couple times they’d visited him since Owens contacted Hopper the same night El had seen him in the void. Quiet, but _Billy_. Snarky, eye rolls, a lot of cursing, but also contemplative and a softness in his eyes that Steve hadn’t really seen there before.

This Billy?

This Billy isn’t like the one Steve knows.

Max is the only one who doesn’t look surprised by what Hopper is saying, by what Owens found. She’s gripping Billy’s good hand until her knuckles turn white, but her face is hard as stone. Steve realized that she’s waiting to fight _for_ Billy, waiting for Steve or Hop or Dr. Owens to say something rude and go off on them in that manic way of hers that reminds Steve so much of Billy even though they’re not really related.

A warmth settled through Steve at the realization. Billy had someone in his corner, someone who would fight tooth and nail for him. He had Max now, more than ever before. Steve didn’t really need to stick around.

Max had taken the only chair next to the bed, so Steve had been leaning against the other side of the bed, his butt on the edge, his back against the wall, careful not to nudge Billy’s wrapped shoulder or casted arm or busted back. His shoulder had been wildly dislocated and his forearm basically snapped in two when he’d shoved himself in front of El. Took the brunt of the monster’s hit, like he was used to it.

Apparently he was. It made Steve feel sick.

Billy’s head was lowered in shame. It was obvious he was embarrassed by Hop even talking about it and Steve strongly felt like he’d made the wrong decision by staying, by even walking into the room in the first place. So, he moved softly like he was about to slide off the bed when Billy’s cast landed on his thigh. Billy didn’t look up at him, but Max shot him a death glare and Steve settled back into the edge of the bed like he’d been before, the weight of Billy’s cast still on his thigh.

Hopper kept talking and Billy’s head kept getting lower and lower, the shame and embarrassment so pungent that even Steve feels it stirring in his own chest.

And then, Billy starts _crying_. Like, tears welling up in his eyes and dripping down onto the hospital sheets.

Steve had never felt more awkward in his life, but that didn’t stop the instinct that everyone teased him for, that caused everyone to call him _babysitter_ and _mom-friend_ and _bitch_. He soothed a hand down Billy’s back, around the tightly wrapped bandages keeping the fucking _hole_ in his body closed. He wasn’t sure if that was the right move – someone like Billy bucked at the softness Steve found himself settling into more and more as he got older and further away from _King Steve_ – but Billy didn’t shrug him off, didn’t growl and snap and push him away. So Steve kept going.

Hop was kneeling in front of him, a little misty eyed himself, patting Billy’s knee wrapped in hospital issue sweats as he promised they’d get Billy through this and that he’d never have to see Neil again if he didn’t want to.

And Billy _didn’t_ want to.

Hopper had… an idea. One he’s presenting to them now. One Steve _really_ would’ve liked to have heard prior to walking into this room.

His face was swollen, it hurt to make wild expressions – _hell_ , it hurt to even blink on the one side. And then Hopper goes and expresses his idea for a solution to the Billy Problem.

He wants Steve to get an apartment.

It’s July, but it won’t be forever, and obviously everyone knows that Steve has no plan. Like, zero plan for his future. Which, _ouch_ , but he gets it.

So, Hop wants Steve to get an apartment and he wants Billy to live there.

Billy kind of seems like he stops breathing, and Steve wants to check his reaction, but he’s sitting so much higher than Billy that it would be so obvious and very awkward to bend down to check his vibe on the situation. So Steve says the first thing that filters through the shock, which is –

“Okay.”

And it also happens to be the truth, apparently. Because, after he says it, he realizes that he _means_ it.

The idea of Billy going back to that house – the x-rays alone made Steve sick, but then the thought of Billy’s behavior being the cause of that house’s effect? – makes Steve feel awful. The thought of living with Billy? Oddly enticing.

He wants Billy safe, he wants Billy out of that house, he wants Billy _better_.

Because, for whatever reason, Steve is now convinced that he’s capable of it. That Billy isn’t all bite and cruelty and aggression. That he’s more. Steve sees it now. Sees what Billy had been trying to hide. That Billy _cares_ , so much more than any of them.

Then Billy looks up at Hop, then at Steve, searches his eyes for a moment before nodding. “Okay.” He looks to Max, who’s still doing her best to break Billy’s good hand, speaks low and sort of gentle to her. “What do you think? Is that something you’d be alright with?”

Max looks like she’s trying to keep up her bluster and anger and _talk shit-get hit_ attitude, but Billy’s eyes and face and voice are kind of wearing her down. “You can’t stay there anymore.” She agreed.

“I’m not leaving you, Max.” He murmured, softer than Steve had ever heard him before and Max’s eyes began to water, though she was trying valiantly to hold it off.

“I know that, assface.” She snapped her gaze up to Steve. “If he does this, just know I’ll be over every day and if you don’t take care of him, I’ll lay you out _and_ tell Dustin what really happened to his limited addition Spiderman.”

“Okay! Alright! I promise to look out for him, geez.”

So, a couple weeks later, Hop finds Steve an apartment downtown and Steve tells his parents that he’s moving out.

He’d honestly expected anger, yelling, _dramatics_ of some kind. But, they hadn’t reacted that way at all. His dad was an architect and his mom was an interior designer and they were off all the time anyway.

He wasn’t quite sure why he’d been expecting them to react in disbelief, not when it’s something they’d been edging him toward anyway. Maybe it’d been wishful thinking. Hoping. Whatever.

His dad had looked at him with something akin to pride in his eyes at the suggestion, like for once Steve had made the right move without being prompted. He clapped Steve on the back, and told him he was proud of Steve for being so _responsible._ His responsibility – a job, an apartment, his heroism at the mall – would be rewarded. They’d make sure there was money in his account every month. His dad wanted him in school, wanted him to join the architecture firm, but respected Steve attempting to make his own way with _honest work_ , as Chris Harrington would say.

Steve tried not to roll his eyes too hard.

So, he moved in with Billy.

Well, Steve moved in and three months later, once he was discharged, Billy moved in too.

They hadn’t stopped visiting after the conversation with Hop. Within the three months that Billy was stuck at the government hospital, Steve had taken Max to see Billy more than anyone else.

Hop went as often as he could, he brought El and Max, sometimes Will. Max tried to go every week – she’d go every day if she could. El started going pretty regularly as well. Billy took to her, whatever had happened between them in the mall had solidified that.

But, Steve ended up there pretty often. He rationalized that Max needed someone, but really, he just wanted to see Billy.

He was about to be living with the guy, Steve figured that they should get comfortable with one another. He like to pretend it wasn’t also because he was worried about Billy.

They would talk, Max brought him books, he wasn’t allowed to have his phone in here but Max promised that she had grabbed it from the pool and it was with the rest of his stuff. Stuff, apparently, Neil had tried to get rid of when he thought Billy was dead.

Billy wasn’t dead. Billy’s name had been carefully leaked in the Hawkins Post by the government in the _found alive & hospitalized_ portion of a recent article. There were so many posts going around about Starcourt, it wasn’t hard to slip one in without people noticing and claim it’d been there all along.

Neil thought he was dead and then Max had apparently tossed her iPad down on the kitchen table one morning, the article with Billy’s name among the survivors. Neil had read it, pushed the iPad away, and returned to his paper. That had been the last of it, Max said. He hadn’t tried to throw out anymore of Billy’s things, but hadn’t bothered to find out what hospital he was at or go after him.

Billy seemed fine with that. And that was the last time they spoke about Neil.

So, Steve sat in a government hospital at least twice a week with Billy and Max, listened as they bickered, watched Billy read and read and read, taught Max how to play gin rummy, and sometimes got Billy to insult him like he use to.

It was different now, though. The insults, the barbs thrown back and forth. It was play fighting, bickering at best. Billy didn’t want to hurt Steve anymore, that much was obvious, from the look in his eyes and the way his insults held no heat.

Steve felt something swirl in his chest.

——

Eventually, three months passed, it was mid-September, and Billy was released.

Max had brought Billy clothes and a duffle bag full of shit that Steve didn’t even bother to look through. Dr. Owens was very clear that his back-chest wound was very much still a _wound_ and to not over do it until it was properly healed. He needed to keep it bandaged, keep it clean, and no strenuous activities until he said so.

Steve and Max were both handed instructions on how to properly clean and bandaged Billy, a list of his medications, and appointments that he needed to come back for.

Billy rolled his eyes and griped, standing in a pair of his own fitted joggers and a band tee. He was still having a little trouble lifting his arms over his head, so Steve had to help him into that shirt which caused Billy to grumble and grit his teeth. Overall, it was the most _Billy_ Steve had seen him since the beginning of the summer. It was nice.

They helped Billy into the car and drove the hour and a half back to Hawkins. Max was filling Billy in on everything from the last week from her spot in the middle of the back. Going on and on about Lucas and Mike being _fucking dumb, Billy! God, why are boys so fucking stupid?_ To which Billy replied, _Beats me, shitbird. But you ain’t wrong._

Steve and Billy didn’t really talk, they just let Max fill the silence with her chatter and angry rants and musings. Steve’s Spotify played softly in the background, a mix of Steve’s music and Billy’s. He saw Billy’s brows furrow when one of his songs began, staring at Steve’s phone.

Billy had his own phone in his hands, rescued by Max and placed in the duffel. It was charging in Steve’s car, but it finally turned on and Billy began to sift through all the notifications and alerts. He was quiet as he looked through the last three months worth of shit, Steve couldn’t read the expression on his face.

They pulled downtown and Steve could see Billy sitting maybe a little lower than before. Max noticed it too, they shared a look through the rearview, but said nothing.

They parked and helped Billy up.

The place was nice enough, two bedroom, open concept, above a coffee shop. There were two more apartments on their floor, but he hadn’t run into any neighbors yet. Steve got a job at the coffee shop downstairs since Scoops was no longer. Robin got hired there as well – thank god.

Robin was on shift currently and after Billy was settled with Max, he’d run downstairs to see her and grab something to drink for them. Currently, Billy was standing in the doorway, looking over everything.

Steve looked around too and tried to see what Billy was seeing.

The apartment wasn’t huge but the living room was a cosy and the kitchen had a island counter built into the wall that divided the rooms. There was a small balcony off the back that Steve knew Billy would love for smoking. They had a nice tv and a comfy couch and a whole bookcase full of books that Max kept picking up for Billy at the local church box drives.

“All my stuff is here.” Billy said quietly, but not softly.

“Yeah, uh, Max has been coming to drop stuff off and kind of like, arrange it? For you. So you didn’t have to.” Steve runs a hand through his hair, it’s getting long and out of control again. “You can totally move whatever you want, man. I’ve just been letting her do whatever she wants, but you can also, um, do whatever you want.”

Billy is looking at him with a smirk in the corners of his mouth and his blue eyes look sort of playful, like they had when they weren’t fighting in school, but still needling each other every chance they got.

“Relax, pretty boy. I just assumed I’d have to go get all my shit from Neil’s.”

_Neil’s_ not _home_.

Billy raised his brows, looking between Steve and Max. Apparently they both had the same dark look on their faces as Max said, “You are _not_ going back there.” And Steve very much agreed.

“Alright, drama queens. Fucking unclench.” Billy rolled his eyes, but that small smirk was still lurking in the corners of his mouth, and wandered over to the doors that lead to the bathroom and bedrooms.

He opened the first one, the bathroom, decent sized with a shower tub and a big mirror over the sink and too many hair products lining the counter, before moving on. The next door he opened was Steve’s room.

It was obvious that this room wasn’t Billy’s, that it was very much lived in, but Billy went in anyway and Steve followed.

He leaned against the doorframe as Billy looked around his room. The unmade, messy bed. The clothes strewn around the floor of the open closet door and the desk chair. The little desk with his laptop and the cork-board above it that held his work schedule and calendar and pictures of the kids, and Nancy and Jonathan, of him and Robin. Steve was certain Billy was about to rifle through his bedside drawers when he turned to leave and Steve moved out of his way.

He opened the last door and looked around his room. It was plain, a new bed, a desk and chair, a smaller bookshelf filled to the brim. His stuff was scattered about, placed however Max had thrown it together.

Billy walked further in, set the duffle bag down on the floor and sat slowly on the bed. There were a mountain of pillows, way more than their should be on one bed, Will had made some comment earlier on that Billy would probably need to sleep propped up for a while and Max had taken that on like a legitimate mission. All of the party’s family had donated things to the _Steve & Billy Apartment Charity Drive_, needless to say there were _a lot_ of pillows.

Max pushed her way through Steve and the doorframe, coming to stand in front of Billy’s seated form, arms crossed aggressively over her chest.

“Obviously change whatever you want. I just put all your stuff away like it was at Neil’s.”

Billy looked away from her aggressive posture and worried gaze, eyes flitting around the room. “Thanks, Maxine. Doesn’t look like total shit.”

Max rolled her eyes, but her shoulders sagged from their defensive stance. “Let’s go over these papers.”

She pulled out the folded pages that Owens had handed them, grabbing the rolling chair and sitting at the desk. Steve pulled his out too and Billy rolled his eyes.

“It says here that you have an appointment every Sunday morning but that your next checkup with Dr. Owens isn’t for another two weeks.” She looked up at him with a furrow between her brows and a highlighter in her hand. “What’s that about?”

Billy looked uncomfortable and his eyes weren’t open and relaxed anymore. He had steeled himself back up. He was looking at the Billy Hargrove who had looked at him in the hallways after the night at the Byers – disconnected and angry.

They stared at each other for a moment – Billy’s eyes still dead and Max’s eyebrow getting increasingly higher as the silence went on.

Eventually Billy rolled his eyes and clenched his jaw, but re-met Max’s gaze. “It’s therapy.” He ground out, not looking away from Max and definitely avoiding Steve. “It’s mandatory. That was the only way Owens let me leave.”

Max continued her staring, blue eyes narrowing before she turned and began highlighting her paper. “Alright, Steve, are you taking him on Sundays or do we call Hopper or Joyce?”

Billy seemed annoyed as the words left her mouth, but he still wouldn’t look in Steve’s direction. “Yeah, of course.” Obviously he’d take Billy to the fucking doctors. The guy had been through actual major trauma, he’d been _possessed_ by a goddamn entity, he _died,_ like actually _died_. Of fucking course he’d take Billy to see his therapist. “I’ll make sure I change my schedule at café.”

Billy looked up then, that furrow in his brows, and met Steve’s gaze for the first time since he entered the room. “You work downstairs?”

“Yeah?” Steve shrugged, suddenly self conscious about his shit job. “I mean, the mall basically blew up, I had to find some other job. Robin and I started there after Hop got us this place.”

Billy just looked at him for a moment, too-blue eyes boring into his, considering. Then his gaze dragged from Steve’s face, which had healed in the past three months, to his wild hair, barely tamed with product from the long day, to his oversized pullover sweater, to his fitted jeans. Steve felt his heart race a little, felt like his mouth was too dry and licked his lips. Billy tracked that movement too.

Max’s voice interrupted… whatever the hell that was and brought them both back to earth.

“It says here you can shower now, but that you need to reapply the ointment and the bandages every time. Also, there’s a list of meds and how to take them – do you want me to get you one of those little pill holders that has the days written on them? Dustin seems like a guy who’d have one of those. I’m gonna ask him for one.”

She was talking to them but also herself, making notes on her papers and rolling her eyes whenever Billy contradicted her.

It was the first time that Steve had seen her so grown up. The kids, obviously, were very grown for their age, they’d seen and dealt with more than anyone should have to. But, they were still _kids_ despite that. Steve could see the teenager Max was becoming and the woman she’d be not long after that. It was weird.

Eventually, it got late and they got hungry, so Steve stepped out to order pizza and went downstairs to see Robin. And to give Billy and Max a little privacy to… talk, or whatever.

He walked downstairs, down the side, and to the front of the shop. He could’ve went in through the back entrance, the key-code in his wallet, but that required effort Steve just didn’t have today.

Robin was at the register with Hannah, Bradyn and Tabby making drinks to their right. There were a couple people scattered at the tables, laptops and phones plugged in.

Robin perked up as she saw him enter, looking him over with gentle eyes.

“Hey.” His voice exuded exhaustion and he ran a hand through his hair.

“Hey, dingus. How did everything go?”

Steve nodded, side eyeing Hannah, who was pretending not to listen.

“Alright. Can you make Max’s usual nightmare concoction and something for me? I’m tired.”

Robin punched it in and Steve slid his card to her. It would end up being next to nothing with his employee discount and Robin would’ve just given it to him, but he still liked the normalcy of paying. “Does he want anything?”

Steve appreciated Robin not using Billy’s name. It wasn’t necessarily a secret, but until Billy was ready to leave the apartment, they weren’t going to blast that _Billy Hargrove – Starcourt Mall Massacre_ _Victim_ was living upstairs.

“Uh… I don’t know?”

Was Billy even allowed to have coffee with the medications he was on?

Robin seemed to sense his ensuing panic and just punched in a vanilla bean frap and swiped his card before he could say anything else. Robin was the best, he loved Robin.

Once the order was put in, Robin took her break and moved to stand with him over by the end of the counter while he waited for their drinks.

“So, how is he?” She asked quietly, the sounds of the blender drowning them out.

“Okay, I think.” Steve really had no clue how Billy was. “He seems alright… still withdrawn, but, like, kind of still Billy, you know?”

Robin nodded, even though she probably _didn’t_ know.

She’d known Billy only as everyone else had. She knew he was an asshole, knew he picked fights and played to win. She knew he’d beaten _King Steve_ last year and that he’d come in to bug them at Scoops. But, everything else she knew was based on what Steve had told her post-Starcourt.

Steve talked about Billy a lot the past three months.

“Well, see how he is in the next few weeks.”

Tabby put his drinks down on the counter and Steve smiled as he grabbed them. “Text me.” Robin said meaningfully, grabbing a pastry and shoving it into a bag and then into Steve’s arms.

“I will.” He went back upstairs to wait for the pizza.

Max and Billy were now in the living room, arguing over… something?

It was playful but real. They weren’t about to throw punches, but Max’s face was getting red and Billy had that sharpness in his tone when he said _Maxine_.

They stopped when he entered, arms full. “I have drinks?”

Max stomped over and helped Steve put down the cups. She grabbed her giant, disgustingly sweet frap with way too much whipped cream and Steve saw Billy make a face. Steve grabbed the vanilla bean and handed it out to him gently.

He waited until Billy looked from the outstretched cup to Steve’s eyes. “I, ah, wasn’t sure if you could have coffee or not, so it’s just vanilla.”

Billy took it, eyeing Steve in that inherently suspicious Billy way of his. “Thanks.”

Steve smiled at him, a small and genuine thing, before grabbing his own coffee and tossing Billy the pastry for him and Max to fight over.

Which they did – because they fought about everything.

But Steve could see that it was changing. It was just part of their dynamic to fight, but it wasn’t necessarily out of anger anymore.

The pizza came and they ate, the tv was playing some Netflix show that the kids liked to watch when they were here. Billy took his meds – _a lot_ of them – and fell asleep on the couch. Steve put a blanket over him.

“It’s his medications.” Max said as she lowered the volume of the tv and ate another slice of pizza. “I read it on one of the papers that it’s a side effect.”

“You’re pretty good at this, Max.” He smiled softly at her, as he would any of the kids. “Being in charge, organizing.”

She flushed and her freckles stood out more, she scowled, probably out of habit, before her face relaxed and she looked back up at him. “Thanks.”

They sat like that for a while. Eating pizza and watching tv as Billy slept between them. Eventually Max muttered and Steve had to turn towards her to hear.

“I’m just worried about him.”

It seemed like she hated to admit something so personal, something so small and delicate inside of her. She had hated Billy long before the rest of them did, but somewhere along the way, she loved him too.

Steve leaned forward to place a hand on her knee. The weather was still nice for September, she was wearing jean shorts, her freckled skin was warm. She felt _alive_ and Steve was more than grateful. He looked into her blue eyes, different from Billy’s but just as nice. “Me too.”

She smiled, a real one, the kind she smiled at El, or when Lucas managed to say something that really got her.

Max woke Billy up briefly to say goodbye. She said it aggressively and he rolled his sleepy eyes but grabbed her for a hug just the same.

That was new – Steve could tell.

Max flushed and tentatively wrapped her arms around his shoulders, careful of his back and chest and bad shoulder.

Steve drove her home and tried not to feel the dread in his stomach as they pulled up to the white house. The lights were on.

Max stared at the house for a moment, face set into the angry glare he’d seen on her for two years. Different from how open and soft she was at the apartment, with Billy, with her friends.

Steve placed a hand on her arm as she went to leave. “Just… if you need anything, _ever_ , please call me. I’ll always come get you, no matter what. And if he tries anything, we call Hop immediately.”

Max nodded and Steve let her go. “Thanks, Steve.” She said meaningfully as she closed the door. “See you tomorrow.”

When he got back to the apartment, Billy wasn’t on the couch anymore, nor was the tv playing. Steve locked the door behind him, shucked his shoes, and padded softly down the hall. Billy’s door was closed but open slightly, the bedside lamp on.

Steve peeked in, just to see. Billy was asleep, the mountain of pillows still on the bed and keeping him elevated, as suggested for his back and chest wound. Steve backed away as gently as he could and went to bed.

——

Living with Billy was… fine.

Odd at first, mostly because they had never lived together before, or lived with other people their age before. It was new, having someone else constantly there – Steve especially wasn’t use to that since his parents had often been gone in his teenage years. But, it was nice having that presence consistently in the apartment, odd but definitely nice.

They tiptoed around one another the first couple of days. Little conversations, nothing like when Max was present. She came every day after school, bringing Billy all the assignments he had missed and was continuing to miss while healing.

Dr. Owens said he could return to school once the chest and back wounds closed a bit more. He could go with the broken arm and shoulder – the dislocation healed, but still sore, Billy’s range of motion still a bit limited – and the broken ribs would take longer. It was the fucking _hole_ they were concerned about.

But, Billy did the work Max brought him and gave it back to her daily to send in. He read books and sat on the couch with Steve to watch tv. He could cook a few things with his limited range of motion and sometimes made something for him and Steve to eat without prompting.

Steve had taken off work for the first few days, wanting to keep Billy company and make sure he’d be alright alone. He hadn’t been sure the extent of Billy’s ability prior to bringing him home, and wanted to be safe than sorry.

Billy didn’t seem to mind having Steve there, contrary to what Steve has assumed. He moved around him like he would Max, though with slightly less hostility. Seemed alright in their shared space, seemed okay enough to be left alone.

So, on Thursday, Steve went downstairs at four am to open – which, _ugh_.

He had his schedule pinned on the board in his room, above his laptop. It was highlighted and bolded – thanks, Dustin – so he wouldn’t forget. So, there in big, bold, and hot pink was _4am – 12pm_. He left a note for Billy on the counter to let him know.

Normally he worked shifts with Robin in the afternoon, picking her and the kids up at school and bringing them here do homework on their shift, but he’d taken off the last couple days and fucking Keith had made the schedule and given him _4am_ s for the next couple of days to make up for it.

He’d gotten a text from Elisabeth, the other opener scheduled, that she’d be running a little late and to _please cover for me! Please Steve I’ll sooo make it up to you!!_ So it was currently just him setting everything up to open at five-thirty.

He was busy brewing coffee and setting timers when he heard the door open. He leaned out of the back lazily, thinking it was Elisabeth showing up earlier than she said, but was absolutely shocked to find Billy.

He was still in what he’d fell asleep in last night – black fitted joggers and a t-shirt, which Steve could see sticking out of the bottom of one of _Steve’s_ oversized hoodies.

He felt the flush on his cheeks. Billy in Steve’s clothes shouldn’t be hot. It _wasn’t_ hot. Billy was a thief. And barely his friend. He shouldn’t care. God, why was he caring?

Billy looked around the café with tired eyes, his face set into an annoyed little pout, all sleep ruffled. It shouldn’t make Steve’s heart speed up or his jaw clench, but it did.

“Hey?” Steve came out from the back room as Billy came up to the counter. “Did I wake you up? I tried not to, sorry.”

Billy’s hair was up in a messy bun, he very clearly hadn’t redone it before coming down here. But, he _had_ gone into Steve’s room and stolen a hoodie, so, like… what the fuck? The Billy of yore would never have entered a public space without his hair done – something that old Steve had always very much understood. Yet, here he was; messy and sleepy and annoyed about it, standing before Steve.

“You didn’t wake me up.” He said matter-of-factly, voice a little gruff with sleep.

“Oh?” Steve wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Had Billy already woken up? Did he wake up this early often? “Are you… good?”

He wasn’t sure why he felt so awkward talking to Billy like this when all he did was check in on the people in his life. He wouldn’t have stumbled over asking literally any one of the kids, or Robin, or Nancy or Jonathan. He wanted to be someone Billy could rely on, he wanted to be his friend – as wild as old Steve would’ve found that notion.

Billy rolled his eyes the same way Max did when someone said something stupid. “I’m fine.” He shoved his hands into the pockets of Steve’s hoodie, looking down at the counter, then at the display case, shoulders a bit tense.

Steve just stood there, holding a a bunch of plastic cups ready to be put in the dispenser. Billy finally seemed to want to answer the question and shrugged his good shoulder. “I just… knew you weren’t there and I woke up. I checked your room, saw your calendar then came down here.”

“I left you a note.” Steve said while his brain was already thinking about what Billy had said.

“Oh.” Billy said, brows furrowed, shoulders getting more and more tense.

“What do you mean you _knew_ I wasn’t there?” He lowered his head a little to catch Billy’s gaze, he still looked sleepy and annoyed, which meant that Steve wasn’t pushing too much by asking. He’d be able to tell by Billy’s eyes or shoulders if the question was too much. “Like, you’re a light sleeper? Or are we talking an Eleven-type situation?”

Billy looked away from Steve and shrugged again. “A bit of both, I guess. I’ve always been a light sleeper, but after… everything, I guess it might be a little more than that too.”

Steve nodded, taking it in, but Billy wouldn’t look up at him. “Okay.” He said simply, moving to put the cups in their dispenser, talking and giving Billy a moment, to follow him if he wanted. “Have you spoken to El about it, or Will?”

Billy slowly moseyed down the counter to where Steve was. “A little.”

“That’s good.” He looked up to find Billy’s tired blue eyes boring into him, like he trying to pull something out of Steve, but he had no clue what. “You want something to drink? Can you have coffee?”

“I don’t know, actually.”

“You look tired.” Steve remarked, having such an urge to reach out and run his thumb gently over the bags under Billy’s eyes – but that wasn’t something that would’ve been welcomed before Starcourt and it probably wouldn’t be welcomed now. “Do you want something non-coffee? I could make you a frap?”

Billy shuffled closer, looking like he’d burrow into Steve’s neck and close his eyes if that was something they did. Which, it wasn’t, no matter how much Steve would enjoy that.

“Yeah, alright.”

Steve moved about to finish setting up, then started on making a chocolate chip frap for Billy. Who just stood there, sleepy and warm looking, watching him.

“Are you gonna go back to sleep?”

Billy shrugged his good shoulder. “Probably. I have a couple things to finish for school before Max comes tonight.” He hands Billy the frap and a straw. “Thanks.”

Steve smirked, “Perks of living with a barista.”

Billy rolled his eyes, but a small smile tugged on his lips and Steve couldn’t help but match it.

Then Elisabeth was running in all in a huff, talking animatedly about how she couldn’t get her car to start and Billy just pulled up the hood of Steve’s hoodie and left quickly, shoulders tense.

“Who was the hottie jogger? He had a really nice ass.”

He cleared his throat, “Yeah, he did.”

Steve really couldn’t quell the blush if he tried.

——

Sunday morning Steve got up, showered and wolfed down a bowl of cereal, ready to take Billy back to the government hospital.

He waited in the kitchen to see if Billy wanted to eat before they left. But the minutes ticked on and Billy still hadn’t appeared. Steve knocked on Billy’s ajar door – because, he noticed, Billy’s door was never fully closed.

“Yeah.” Was Billy’s only reply.

Steve pushed the door open a bit wider to find him seated on the bed. Steve had begun to realize that Billy’s outfits consisted solely of sweats – track pants and joggers, long sleeved shirts and sweaters. Mostly Steve’s hoodies. Billy didn’t even ask, he just went into Steve’s room while he wasn’t home and grabbed what he wanted.

Steve wanted to be mad about it, at the very least annoyed, but he wasn’t. He liked seeing Billy in his clothes, as possessive as that made him sound. It also made him a little warm that Billy was somehow comforted by them, by _Steve_.

“You alright?”

Billy was looking at the ground, but nodded. He stood without prompting and walked out of the room, Steve following after him.

“Let’s go, pretty boy.”

There had been a lot of _pretty boys_ since Billy’s return to the living and less _Harringtons_ than expected. Still no _Steves_ , which shouldn’t bother him, seeing as Billy never really called him by his first name unless it was in a mocking way. But… Steve wanted him to. He wanted to hear his name on Billy’s lips.

Okay, he could admit to himself that this was getting ridiculous. Clearly whatever little crush he’d had on Billy Hargrove was officially out of control and the guy had only lived there a week.

Fuck.

They drove the hour and a half, Steve’s _Billy_ playlist on softly in in the background. Billy sat staring out the window for a long time. Steve didn’t know what to say.

His mom called before he could think of something.

He didn’t want to answer it. He didn’t want to talk to his mom, and he really didn’t want to talk to his mom with Billy in the car. He could let it go to voicemail, but then she’d try him again later and he’d have to deal with the guilt trip of not answering the first time.

He sighed and answered the call. “Hi, Mom.”

“Hi, Darling.”

It wasn’t that he didn’t like his mom – he did, infinitely more than he liked his dad. It was just… not easy.

Not like the way it was with Mrs. Henderson, or Joyce, or hell, even Hop or Mrs. Wheeler. His mother loved him a lot, of that Steve was certain, but he always had the distinct impression that his parents didn’t _like_ him very much. He wasn’t what they’d wanted and he knew that.

Billy turned from the window to look at him, a brow raised as he watched Steve struggle through talking to his mom.

“You haven’t stopped by the house in a while, your father was wondering if you’ve heard back from the community college yet?”

Steve couldn’t bare to look over at Billy, instead keeping his eyes on the road as his face flushed in embarrassment.

“Yeah, uh, they said no. I applied too late. Besides, I already told you that I’m not going to college.”

He could hear the sigh in his mother’s voice. “Steven, I know you say that now, but in a year – in five years – you may feel differently.”

“Well, then I’ll try again when I feel that way.”

“I’m not going to fight you about this.” The tone of his mother’s voice was very much already annoyed, like he was the one who brought it up. “I’m speaking at a conference, so I’ll be gone this week. I know your father will be in the city most of the week as well.”

“I know, Mom, I got the google calendar update. Dad’s in Indianapolis, you’re in Boston.”

“I just wanted to let you know, darling, in case you decided to pop by.” He wouldn’t, not that she knew that. “I’ll call you this week from Boston.”

“Okay.”

“Make sure to give your father a call.”

“I will.” Steve held back a sigh.

“Bye, darling, love you.”

“Bye, Mom.”

The call ended and the music started back up through the speakers and Steve refused to look at Billy.

He could feel Billy staring at him, probably knew exactly what face he was making too. But Steve didn’t take his eyes off the road.

He didn’t want to talk about his mom. He didn’t want to talk about either of his parents or the kind-of child abandonment thing they’d had going on for a while now or the way he felt like he was literally drowning, gasping for air in their presence sometimes. Especially not in front of someone like Billy, who’s parent _actually_ abused him. He was dumb, but he wasn’t _that_ socially unaware.

But, because it was something Steve didn’t want Billy to do, that’s exactly what Billy fucking did.

“She sounds nice.”

It had that slightly lascivious tone he always took on when he was attempting to rile someone up. Steve rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, real nice.”

It was obvious from Steve’s tone that he didn’t want to talk about it. Billy was quiet for a moment and Steve thought maybe he’d gotten the memo, that he’d lay off like he’d been doing for the past three months. But no, Billy of yore decided to make an appearance for the first time since early summer. Of course.

“Your parents gone a lot?”

It wasn’t quite what Steve had thought he’d say. He honestly expected Billy to ask about how hot his mom was or if she was looking for a new friend – something skanky and gross that old Billy definitely would’ve said to get Steve to push him in the locker room.

Steve turned to look at him without really thinking about it. One minute he was steadfastly ignoring Billy, eyes on the road, next he was looking at those thunderstorm eyes of his that looked at Steve like he _knew_.

Hell, maybe he did.

Billy hadn’t said much at all about himself post-Mind Flayer. Just little pieces here and there, like what he’d told Steve in the café the other morning about _knowing_ Steve hadn’t been there anymore. Steve legitimately had no idea the extent of Billy’s psyche post-Starcourt, for all he knew Billy could read his fucking mind.

Well, that was a bit unlikely.

Only because he doubted Billy would want to live with him if he could hear all the gushy, inappropriate things he thought about Billy on the daily.

Or, maybe Steve’s sucky home life wasn’t as big of a secret as he had thought. Maybe this wasn’t El related at all, maybe Billy had just heard whatever shit Tommy had decided to spew – Tommy had been his friend growing up, he’d probably know better than anyone the state of Steve’s empty house.

He looked away from Billy’s eyes and back to the road. “Yeah.”

Billy seemed like he was waiting for more, but Steve wasn’t one to really talk about himself or his unfulfilling home life. So he just kept driving.

“Did you actually even apply to that school, or were you just trying to get Mommy off your back?”

It seemed a little bit like what wasn’t at all what Billy was going to say, but had settled on it instead of the root of Steve’s abandonment issues.

Steve threw him a look, and grouchily replied. “No, I applied. Had Robin look over it and everything.”

Which, is like, even worse.

Steve was so sure that Billy was going to make some comment about Steve’s shit essays and why he didn’t have Billy look them over while he’d been stuck in the goddamn hospital. Steve had a rebuttal all ready, queued up to go. And then, that’s not at all what Billy said.

“So, what, are you like, dating now?”

Steve was so shocked that he looked over to Billy, seeing the slight sharpness in his eyes and the way he held his shoulders tight like he was ready to strike. It was jarring from the comfortable, languid way he sat next to Steve on the couch.

“What?”

Billy’s gaze still sharp as he continued on. “Not really what I’d pegged as your type, seeing as Wheeler was about as straight-laced as they come, Buckley seems a bit out there for you.”

“Dude, Robin’s _not_ my girlfriend.”

Steve had to put a stop to this nonsense quickly before it got back to Robin that he was like, telling people they were dating or something. That was not something he needed.

Billy rolled his eyes, “ _Fucking._ Whatever.”

Steve couldn’t help the small chuckle that escaped at the thought. “Definitely not.” Billy’s brows furrowed like he was getting angry, like he thought Steve was _lying_ to him. _Friends don’t lie_. “Billy, Robin’s like, _super_ gay.”

Billy seemed to just stare at him for a moment and Steve had to keep looking between him and the road, brows raised like, _hello, idiot, obviously I wouldn’t lie to you!_

“Not that it’s even my place to tell you that, but she’s pretty open about it. I guess, maybe not that much at school – I definitely didn’t know until she told me. But she has this “thriving” online life, or so she says, and like, all of her internet friends know she’s gay.”

He looked at Billy, who’s shoulders had deflated a bit, his brows still furrowed. “Oh.”

“Yeah.” Steve said, though this time with a shrug and a lot less attitude. “So, definitely not dating her. Or fucking her for that matter.”

And while he might’ve entertained the idea very briefly before she came out to him, now he literally could not even imagine that’ve happening. Like, at all.

“Are you gonna be like, _weird_ about it when she comes over?”

Billy looked up at him so quickly, eyes sharp and annoyed. “Why the fuck would I be weird about it?”

Steve wanted to tell him to chill, but he didn’t want Billy to be possessed by Billy of yore and hit him, so he just shrugged as casually as he could. Like this was a normal conversation. Like these were things they talked about while driving to a hospital run by the government.

“I don’t know? It’s a valid question. Its not like I really know all that much about you when it comes to… shit like that.”

Steve should probably stop talking because Billy looked offended and he really didn’t want to fight with Billy, especially before the guy was suppose to be in fucking _therapy,_ but Steve just kept going, unable to stop himself.

“I know you’re probably not homophobic because you literally punched a guy in the face for calling me a queer in the locker room. But that doesn’t necessarily mean you’re like, _cool_ with it? Y’know? And I don’t want you to be uncomfortable in your own home, but I _definitely_ can’t deal with Robin being uncomfortable because she’s like, my best friend and I’m pretty sure she’s the first actual best friend I’ve ever really had –”

“Steve.” Billy growled out, clearly over his rambling tirade. And, it was the first _Steve_ he’d gotten, of course it was out of annoyance. “I’m not fucking homophobic. I’m not going to be fucking _weird_ about it, alright?”

“Okay.” He looked back at Billy, who was no longer looking at Steve. He was staring straight ahead, arms crossed as best they should with the cast on his arm, jaw tight.

It took a little while of silence, some song playing quietly in the background, before Billy turned his head back to Steve, eyes and posture still clearly pissed.

“I’m not fucking Neil, you know that right?” And that was not ever something Steve had thought? Especially after what Hop had showed them in the hospital. Billy pushed on, not waiting for Steve to even open his mouth. “I get that I’m a fucking asshole and that I’ve given everyone reason to hate me, but I’m _not_ like my dad.”

“I didn’t think you were.” Steve said softly.

His initial instinct was to growl back, push and nudge at whatever vulnerable part of himself Billy was trying to hide. But he wasn’t that guy anymore. Hadn’t been that guy since Jonathan laid him out, since he’d let Tommy spray paint nasty shit about Nancy on the old theatre marquee. He wasn’t that asshole anymore and the new instinct – the one he was trying harder and harder to listen to – was to comfort, to be kind.

Maybe it was from dealing with all the kids and their fragile emotions. Maybe it was from Nancy breaking his heart. Maybe it was from goddamn monsters ruining his life. Whatever it was, Steve was trying.

Billy relaxed minutely into his seat. He looked like he was on the verge of saying something, his jaw tense, his lips pursed, his fingers flexing. But he didn’t. He didn’t say anything.

He hated that he didn’t known what to say to Billy. He wanted to switch topics easily and change the subject to something that would make him smile or laugh. But, even after the Byers’ and the apology, Steve and Billy had never been very good at having any sort of conversation that wasn’t at least a little antagonistic.

So, they sat in silence. Steve turned up the music. Then they were there.

Steve pulled up to the stop, handed over his license and Billy’s to the officer, he checked the board and waved them in. He was pulling into a parking spot when Billy spoke.

“You don’t have to come in.”

“Alright.” Steve parked and looked at him. “Whatever you want me to do. I can wait here.”

Billy gave Steve one of those looks, the ones where Steve had absolutely no clue what they meant and Billy’s too-blue eyes bored into his.

“It usually lasts about an hour or so.”

“Okay.”

Billy gave him one last lingering look before getting out of the car. “Cafeteria’s on the first floor if you get bored.”

He slammed the car door before Steve could reply. He watched Billy walk into the building, not hobbling, but definitely not swaggering like he normally would.

Steve let out a deep breath and leaned back against the seat. _Fucking hell_. Things with Billy shouldn’t be this difficult, but what did he expect? The guy had never been easy to read, not even when he was raged out and punching Steve in the face.

He called Robin – because that seemed like the sensible thing to do.

“Oh my god, why are you calling me this early on a Sunday when I’m not working?”

“It’s like, nine o’clock, stop whining.”

Robin groaned for an excessive amount of time before going silent. Steve took that to mean he could speak now or she’d fallen back asleep.

“You alive?”

“Barely.” She griped, but he could hear her blankets rustling and a loud yawn, so it was safe to say she wouldn’t immediately hang up on him. “Aren’t you suppose to be bringing Billy to the spooky government hospital today?”

“I am currently at said spooky government hospital, waiting for Billy.”

“Uh huh. And how’s that going? I’m going to take you calling me to mean that it’s going really well.”

Steve rolled his eyes at her sarcasm. “It’s fine. He’s inside, I’m in the car.”

“So… what’s the matter?”

“Why does something have to be the matter? I can’t just call you to pass the time while he’s in there?”

He could practically _hear_ the overly dramatic eye roll she was giving him right now. “ _Please_. Spare me the drama and just tell me what’s the matter. It’s too early for this.”

Steve sighed and slumped down in his seat, annoyed that she could read him so well. He’d never had a friend that knew him like this, Nancy came close sometimes, on occasion Dustin, but never as well as Robin. Having a best friend was kind of a drag.

“Come on, dingus. Out with it.”

“Billy and I… sort of got into a fight.”

“A fight? About what? Why are you fighting him – he was just possessed by a monster and _died_.”

“ _I’m_ not fighting him! We just fought – _argued_ – about stupid… it was stupid. Alright?”

“Well, what did you “argue” about, then?”

“Just,” Steve sighed, rubbing at his tired eyes. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know what you argued about?” Robin had that tone where he just _knew_ the face she made with it. The face said he was a dingus. She, as usual, was right.

“My mom called and I answered. It was dumb, just letting me know that both her and my dad would be gone this week. Then she asked me about the school she forced me to apply to.”

“Ouch.”

“Yeah. Which lead Billy to asking me if my parents were gone a lot – which, _yeah_ , but it’s not like I want to unload all of my childhood trauma onto a guy with _actual childhood trauma_ , y’know? So I got pissy and he changed the subject to if I actually even applied to that school –”

“Oof.”

“And I did, so that’s embarrassing because they said no. But I told him the truth, how I had you look over my essay, which then prompted him to ask if _we were dating_?”

“Excuse me, _who_?” Steve could hear the multiple question marks at the end there.

“I told him we were, in fact, not dating. And then he says, and I quote, _Fucking, whatever_. Like that’s a normal thing to say! So, I’m really sorry but I outed you to Billy Hargrove. I figured it was that or let rumor spread that you’re the next Queen Harrington.”

“Smart move. Figured I’d tell him anyway if we’d be hanging out all the time. I literally would _not_ have been able to deal if he hit on me.” He could hear her making coffee in the background. “So, was this the fight?”

“Oh no, there’s more.”

“How could there possibly be more?”

“Because I don’t know when to shut up.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I then asked him if he was gonna be weird about it – because while I’m pretty sure Billy’s not homophobic, I just had to make sure. You’re my best friend, y’know?”

“While I’m touched, truly, I’m going to assume that Billy didn’t take it that well.”

“That would be a no. He basically accused me of calling him his father – which, like, I would _never_. Billy smashed a fucking plate over my head and I would still never say that to him.”

“But he’s not talking about his dad in that context.” She stated like he needed reminding. “He was talking about being homophobic, not abusive. Guess Neil Hargrove’s a bigger trashcan than we thought.”

“Huh?”

And, yeah, Steve knew that when he said things like that, all clueless and dopey, that he was really playing into the stereotype that their classmates liked to perpetrate about him. But he really had no clue what she was talking about, lost in the conversation.

“Duh, dingus. We know Neil Hargrove is a piece of garbage, we probably should’ve just assumed he’d be a homophobic asshole too. Probably why Billy’s so fucking closeted.”

And – what?

Once in a while when they were working at Scoops, Robin would make some comment about Billy. Usually it was about the tightness of his jeans and the casual way he’d have his shirts barely buttoned, and sometimes when they were drunk or high she’d talk about how much Billy stared at Steve and the homoerotic subtext of their exchanges on the basketball court.

But she never once outright said that she thought that Billy was anything less than straight. Implied here or there with a saucy wink or a smirk, but that was it. Never seriously.

He tried not to let that little spark of _hope_ fan too brightly in his stomach.

“Wait, hold on. You think because of one comment he made about his dad that Billy’s like, gay?”

“Or somewhere on that end of the sexuality spectrum.” She replied casually. “And that one comment is everything. Very telling.”

Steve’s brows furrowed in confusion. “How?”

Robin sighed like she had to do all the work for Steve, he rolled his eyes at her dramatics. “Look, your dad is also very much not _PC_ , if you catch my drift, and you’re not out here trying to convince your roommate that you’re _not_ Chris Harrington – you know? But Billy _is_. So, maybe that says something, maybe it doesn’t.”

He shook his head, “You’re so unhelpful sometimes.”

“Want my advice?”

“Yeah, obviously.”

“Stop fighting with Billy.” And that wasn’t really what he thought she’d say. “He was obviously just trying to talk to you about things normal close friends would talk about. You literally would not have reacted that way if it had been any one of those brats or Nancy or me, or hell, even Jonathan. So, like, _relax_ and just be friends with the guy. It’s obviously what he wants.”

“Yeah.” He muttered, thinking it over. “Alright.”

“Great, text me later. I’m hanging up now.”

“Bye.”

Well, okay.

Be friends with Billy. He could do that. He’d been _trying_ to do that.

It was just hard, going from being so antagonistic to this. He wasn’t sure if Billy would be rude about the things he’d say, or pick at the sore spots he tried to keep covered up. Because, Steve was finding, he didn’t really know Billy at all.

He thought a lot about what Robin said while he wasted his data by watching something on Netflix on his phone while he waited for Billy. Time moved quicker once he’d thrown something on and about halfway through what he was watching, Billy emerged from the building.

His hands were shoved deep into the hoodie’s pockets – the cast barely fitting and peeking out – shoulders tense and a bit haunched. His strong jaw was clenched like he was annoyed and as he got closer, Steve could see that also reflected in his eyes.

Steve paused the show on his phone as Billy got into the car, careful even in his anger not to jostle his injuries too much. He looked down at Steve’s phone, brows furrowed in confusion.

“Are you watching a show about tiny houses?”

That seemed to really throw him and Steve could see a little of the annoyance or anger or whatever it was leave him.

“Uh… yeah.” He chuckled, little embarrassed, and ran hand through his hair. “Dustin’s mom is obsessed with _HGTV_ , it’s seriously always on at their house, so, ah, sometimes I just watch it when I’m bored or can’t sleep.”

Billy looked at him like he wanted to say something, but then pulled his eyes back to the phone that Steve was putting back on the dash. Steve didn’t say anything as he left the parking lot, or after they made it through the security checkpoint, not until they were really driving again. Thinking about what Robin said and trying to push down the slightly nauseating feeling that Billy would mock him.

“I, um, I have trouble sleeping. A lot. Which is why I watch so many weird tiny house shows.”

That’s something he’d say to Robin or Nancy. It’s something Dustin _actually_ knows about him. It’s something he’d tell his friends. He probably wouldn’t have waited so long to say it to any of them, but – progress.

He could feel Billy looking at him, so Steve chanced a look over. He didn’t look confused, but that divot between his brows was present, and the look on his face was a little _why are you telling me this_ , but he wasn’t mocking Steve or being mean about it, so Steve counted it as a win.

“Why.” Billy asks, and at first Steve things that’s it. That’s the question. But, then he keeps going. “Why do you have trouble sleeping a lot?”

And it comes out a little gruff – like most things Billy say do – but the end is a little gentle, and… Steve’s not the only one trying.

So he answers it honestly with a dark little chuckle.

“Take your pick. The past three years of my life have been nothing short of fucking terrifying.”

Billy’s brows furrowed and his face went a little dark and it was then that Steve realized that Billy didn’t actually know everything that went down pre-Starcourt. He probably knew some, Steve knew that Max had filled him in when he’d been in the hospital, but it was glaringly obvious now that no one had told him everything. Or, at least the parts with Steve.

He sighed, relaxing his shoulders and settled a little more into his seat. He… didn’t talk about this stuff. Not really that they were allowed to, but he didn’t even talk about to the people that already knew. He tended to keep things bottled up, close to the chest. He had a feeling Billy could relate.

Before he could ask, Steve told him.

“The first year, when… everything started, I had literally no clue it was even going on. None of us really did, except the kids and Joyce. Will was stuck in the Upside Down, the government planted a fake body, no one would listen to the Byers, Nancy and Jonathan were wandering around the woods at night with a damn gun and the goddamn kids were harboring El in Nancy’s basement like she was fucking _E.T._ – and I didn’t know any of it. All I knew was that Nancy’s best friend went missing from my pool and that Jonathan was trying to steal my girlfriend. So. That was fun.”

He looks at Billy with a sarcastic little smile and tried to stop the shaking in his hands that happens whenever he talks about this stuff. Which, is probably why he doesn’t.

“He fucked me up pretty good, I think the two of you could probably swap some pointers.”

That was clearly the wrong thing to say, as Billy’s jaw clenched tight. Steve moved on quickly.

“Um, I went to apologize to Jonathan, because we’d gotten into this fight, and got introduced to the bat in my trunk, got up close and personal with a fucking _demogorgon_. Then, you just pretend for a while that things are normal, because you have to keep going to school and keep acting like you _didn’t_ fight some wild ass monster with a nail bat and watch a kid come back from the dead. And, that was okay for a while – the pretending. I wanted to pretend. I wanted to be normal so badly. But then, Nancy and I kept going to her dead friend’s house for dinner, and her parents didn’t even know she was _dead_ – because Owens made us all sign these crazy NDAs – and that was… emotionally crushing, y’know? To sit in front of them and listen as they talk about their daughter like he’s _alive_ when you _know_ she’s dead. And then, Nancy broke my heart and my house was always empty and Will got possessed by the Mind Flayer, like you did, and Dustin fucking adopted a baby _demodog_ – you know I fought off like five of those shits in the junkyard with only my goddamn bat because those little assholes don’t think things through?”

And now that he started, he kind of couldn’t stop. His hands were shaking where he gripped the wheel too tight and his voice was wavering slightly. Billy just listened, eyes never leaving Steve as he tumbled into some kind of manic breakdown. Fucking hell.

“Do you know how hard protecting them is? I followed them into fucking _monster_ _tunnels_ , all I do is try and keep those shits alive when all they do is put themselves in danger. And, that night…” He sends a little glance Billy’s way, knowing Billy doesn’t like when he brings it up. “That night, I was just trying to keep them safe.”

“I know that, Steve.” He says it so quietly.

Steve feels his eyes begin to burn a little. “And then fucking _Russians_ take over the damn mall and I’m stuck in a bad situation with Robin and Dustin and Lucas’ little sister, stuck in a goddamn underground lab, and then I’m being beaten, _again_ , and fucking drugged and chased and – _you_ were fucking _possessed_ and none of us knew and I hit you with a car and then you _died_.”

“Steve, pull over.”

He’s breathing heavy now and his nose stings, and Billy’s voice is gentle but firm.

“Pull over, Steve. Now.”

So he does, pulls over on the side of the empty county highway they were on. He doesn’t even bother putting his hazards on, just throws the car in park and presses his shaky hands to eyes.

“Sorry.” Steve manages. “I didn’t… I didn’t mean to unload all that on you. I – I, just –”

“I think you’re having an anxiety attack.”

He felt Billy’s hand on his back, it was warm. He was hunched over, his hands still over his eyes. He took a deep breath in and then smaller ones, trying to get his heartbeat under control.

He started laughing and sat up a bit. Billy’s hand stayed on his back.

“I’m sorry, man. Like, literally the last thing you need is me having a fucking breakdown.”

Billy rolled his eyes but moved his hand from Steve’s back up to his shoulder, gripping. “Shut up.”

He didn’t feel shaky anymore, his heart slowing. He didn’t look at Billy.

Fucking Robin, convincing him to _talk_ to Billy. What the fuck. Steve never had a problem keeping his feelings to himself before – maybe it was the El-related powers Steve decided Billy may have? Or, maybe it was just Billy.

_Shared Trauma_ and all that, as Nancy would say.

“Maybe you should be going to damn therapy.” Billy muttered.

Steve snorted, turning to look at him finally. “Maybe I should.”

Billy removed his hand from Steve’s shoulder but didn’t move away. “You can share mine, but I have to warn ya, she’s a real bossy bitch under her gentle tone.”

“I’m pretty used to bossy bitches.” He smiled.

Billy rolled his eyes, a small smile hidden in the corner of his lips. “I’m sure you are.”

Steve put the car back in drive and pulled back into the road. “That’s never happened before.” He catches Billy’s gaze. “I don’t… freak out like that.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t keep shit so bottled up.” Billy shoved his hands back into the hoodie pockets. “Don’t you have like, friends to talk to?”

Steve sighed. “Not really.” Billy raised an eyebrow. “I mean, I do – yes. Now. I have Robin, and I guess Nancy and Jonathan. But… I don’t really talk about this shit. I don’t really talk about a lot of shit.”

“Like how your parents are never home?” Billy said as he leaned back into the seat, that sharpness returning to his eyes.

“Yeah.” Steve exhaled. “Like that.”

“I didn’t talk about any of my shit either.” Billy said quietly. “But, I didn’t have any friends to tell it to.”

And – didn’t that just cut Steve right in the chest.

He’d been right, all those months ago when he thought that he was the closest thing Billy had to a friend. The thought made his stomach hurt, so he did exactly what Billy would do.

“Guess we figured out why you were such an asshole.”

Billy shoved Steve’s shoulder at the jokey comment and it was the most playful gesture they’d ever shared. Steve smiled and when he looked over, he found a small smirk on Billy’s lips.

It was new, this playfulness between them. But also the heaviness too. Maybe they were becoming friends. _Good_ , Steve thought.

——

So it went like that for a while – Billy had appointments and Steve worked and the kids came over and they would sit together and watch tv.

Robin came by a few weeks in, dropped onto the couch next to Billy with no hesitation and started some tirade about whatever book he’d been reading.

The two of them did that often – debate books and theories and characterizations, like the smart people they were. Steve mostly had no idea what they were talking about, but he was content to sit with them while they did it.

Steve and Billy were also becoming… closer?

After his wildly sudden breakdown in the car, Billy had taken to telling Steve things. Most of them were normal – his opinion on whatever they were watching, what he could cook and if Steve was interested in any of that, musings about Steve’s hair which needed to be trimmed soon.

It was nice. Especially since Billy wasn’t cleared for school or much activity so he was always home. Obviously Steve’s home life prior the apartment had been a tad empty, it was just… nice to have someone always around. Billy was there when he got home, when he got up, when Steve had another nightmare and went to sit in the living room at three am.

Billy did that a lot – coming to sit with Steve after a nightmare.

At first, he was afraid that he’d woken Billy up. That he’d been doing something embarrassing like scream or cry out, and that made him uncomfortable. But Billy would just shuffle out and sit on the couch with him as some random house hunting show played quietly around them.

He didn’t address Steve’s discomfort or embarrassment. He just sat down on the couch and would watch whatever was playing with sleepy eyes. Sometimes he’d make snarky comments about the show, sometimes he would sit with his back to the arm of the couch and dig his cold ass feet under Steve’s thigh. It was nice.

Steve wasn’t sure if Billy had nightmares. Billy didn’t really talk about what happened to him.

It was like pre-Starcourt, which implied before summer, and post-Starcourt, which implied the hospital to now. Anything in between was silently off limits. The only time Steve had even addressed it was during his panic spiral in the car, and that had just been stating facts.

But, Billy’s door was never closed all the way and the bedside lamp was always on. He didn’t like to be cold, obviously since he’d stolen almost all of Steve’s hoodies and sweatpants, and he seemed so very hesitant about going outside.

So, they both had shit.

Steve didn’t want to push him into talking if he wasn’t ready. Billy hadn’t once tried to needle Steve about his nightmares, which weren’t frequent but also not once in a while either, or his life plans, or his parents. All sore subjects. Steve wanted to do the same.

But he also wanted to make sure that Billy was _actually_ okay.

“Do you… um, have nightmares?” Steve asked one night when Billy had shuffled out not long after him.

The tv was on low, a quiet murmuring around them that would lull him back to sleep if he was tired enough. Billy was settled beside him, the space between them normal, but now felt so distant after his question.

Billy’s gaze was on the tv, but Steve could see the muscle in his jaw tighten. Normally Steve would find it attractive. This time? It made him a little sick, knowing he was the cause of Billy’s distress or anger.

_Great._ The exact opposite of what he wanted.

Billy took a deep breath in through his nose and held it for a moment before letting it out, eyes never leaving the tv. He was sitting criss-cross on his end of the couch, the fingers of his free hand picking at the pills in his sleep pants.

“Sometimes.”

Steve was staring. He knew he was staring and that he should stop, that he was probably freaking Billy out or like, putting pressure on him to respond. But he couldn’t pull his gaze and he couldn’t stop the exhale of relief at Billy’s words.

“You don’t have to talk about it. I probably shouldn’t have even asked.” He rushed out, hands running through his hair. “It’s just… nice to know that I’m not…”

“The only freak around here?” Billy finally turned away from the tv to look at him. He didn’t look _mad_ , or all that hard, not like Steve had been expecting, but he didn’t look all that soft about it either.

“You’re not a freak, Billy.” He said it as honestly as he could. Hell, it was probably the most sincere he’d ever been.

Billy’s too-blue eyes shone in the light from the tv, reflecting a bit in the dark of the room. “I am.” He admitted. “We don’t need to pretend, Steve. Nothing about this situation has been normal. I’m not fucking normal.” He snorted. “Hell, I don’t think I ever was.”

“I don’t think any of us are.” Steve pulled his gaze away from Billy’s eyes, ending up somewhere around his hands, the cast over his arm. “I meant what I said. You don’t have to talk about anything, I won’t push. Well, I’ll try not to anyway. I’m not the brightest so you may have to remind me –”

Billy cut off Steve’s minor self-depreciation an annoyed sound that was almost growl-like. It was the most he’d sounded like old Billy ever and it’d been just a noise.

“If you don’t cut it with this _I’m fucking dumb_ routine, I will literally kick your ass, Harrington.” His eyes were sharp when Steve looked back up. “Stop talking about yourself like you’re an idiot – you’re not. I’m pretty sure we’re all sick of it.”

Steve looked away, biting the inside of his cheek. He hadn’t been great at school even before the stress and chaos of the Upside Down, he knew that he wasn’t _stupid_ but, after so many people call you dumb…

“You didn’t get into college, who cares? Look, I got into so many fights and shit before all of this went down, I’ll be fucking lucky if I even graduate.”

“You can’t hide the fact that you’re smart, Billy.” Steve turned to look at him, a small smile tucked into the corners of his lips. “Even under all that attitude.”

Billy rolled his eyes and his arm shot out to push playfully at Steve’s shoulder. There was a time that he couldn’t have believed that Billy could be playful, that he could shove without hurting. But here he was.

“You know that you’re not a freak, right?” He looked at Billy sincerely through his lashes. “Bad shit happened to you, but you’re alive and you’re dealing with it. That’s all that matters.”

Billy held his gaze for a long while, just looking at him – Steve’s eyes and face and hair and mouth, his neck and shoulders and chest and legs all sprawled. He wondered what Billy saw when he looked at him. Did he see whatever Nancy saw? Did he see what Robin or the kids did? Could he see all the things that Steve’s parents didn’t like, didn’t think were good enough?

“There’s… a lot that I can’t talk about. That I literally just can’t put into words.” Billy’s eyes were burning, so blue and so guarded. “But I don’t want you to think it’s because I don’t trust you. I do. Or I wouldn’t be here.”

And Steve knew that to be true. If Billy didn’t want to be here – he wouldn’t. He would’ve made different arrangements with Hopper, would’ve walked out and Steve wouldn’t be able to stop him.

But to hear that he had Billy’s trust was… well, it was powerful. It meant something.

“So, yeah. I have nightmares sometimes. I’m not always even asleep when they happen. And I don’t feel comfortable in my own skin, still. I don’t like to be touched, being outside this apartment gives me anxiety, and my hair is too long but I can’t even do anything about it.”

Billy clenched his fist and looked away from Steve. Jaw tight and eyes hard.

“My dad doesn’t even care that I’m alive. Didn’t care that I was dead either. And Max…” He sighed deeply. “She shouldn’t care that I am. I’ve been a dick to her since we moved here and all she does is _care_ about me. And you,” He looked back at Steve, eyes soft and a little sad. “I don’t even know _why_ you fucking agreed to Hopper’s idea, since all I’ve been is an asshole to you.”

“Billy –”

“It’s the damn truth and you know it, Steve. I don’t deserve any of this after all the shit I’ve pulled. But you wanna know the kicker?” He leaned in slightly, covering some of the gap between them, eyes pained like what he was about to say was more than hard for him. “I don’t think I could handle it if you left me. I think I’d break. How fucking selfish and weak is that?”

Steve felt his heart _race_ at Billy’s words. Because, like, _what the fuck_.

“I think you’ve got a better chance at leaving me, nerd.”

And his voice was soft and he was sure his eyes matched, like how they were when he’d been with Nancy and would talk to her all slow and quiet. Which, didn’t bode well for the friendship part of their relationship if that’s now how he was speaking to Billy – like he was Steve’s goddamn girlfriend.

Billy rolled his eyes, but Steve added seriously, “I’m not going to leave you, Billy. The past is the past and it’s a goddamn bitch and I don’t care.”

Billy snorted and shook his head at Steve. “Okay, pretty boy.”

He rearranged his body so that he was sitting with his feet shoved under Steve’s thigh. Steve wanted to lay his hand around the curve of Billy’s ankle, but didn’t.

They kept watching whatever house show Steve had thrown on until one of them fell asleep.

——

After Billy’s appointment with Owens, a couple days before Thanksgiving, he gave Billy the green light to return to school. The black goo was gone and his wounds were closing nicely, Billy could now lift his arms without crying and his dislocation was fully healed. His arm was still in the cast and would be for a while, but Owens said light activity and rehabilitation were now permitted.

Billy could go back to school after Thanksgiving break, but judging by his silence on the drive home, he wasn’t too thrilled about it.

Steve remembered their conversation on the couch a few weeks ago, about Billy saying he had anxiety about leaving the apartment.

“Hey.” Billy dragged his gaze away from the window to Steve. “We haven’t really talked about it, but, I was planning on going to Dustin’s for Thanksgiving and I’d like you to come with me.”

Billy’s brows furrowed in that way they did when Steve said something that he was trying to work out while processing many emotions. Steve pressed on.

“Obviously you don’t have to. I just don’t want you to be alone and Mrs. Henderson makes really good food. And,” He paused, gauging Billy’s reaction. “I was thinking, maybe, they could help you cut your hair.”

Billy’s brows narrowed in confusion. “What?”

“You mentioned a while ago that your hair was getting too long. I’d do it for you, but I don’t really know how to cut curly hair, I know it’s different than straight hair, and Dustin’s mom cuts his hair all the time!”

“Oh, cause that inspires such confidence.” Billy rolled his eyes. “I appreciate the thought, pretty boy, but I’m still not exactly kosher with people touching me, especially strangers.”

“Well,” Steve started, careful to keep his tone very casual. “I could cut it, if you want. I’d just need her to show me how.” He shrugged. “Just a thought. You don’t… you don’t really seem to mind when I touch you.”

Because that was something that was becoming more and more obvious as time went on. Max touched Billy and Billy touched her – simple, casual, sibling like. Max had seemed hesitant only at first, mostly because she hadn’t wanted to hurt him. It was shoves here and tousled hair there, quick squeezes before leaving, and high-fives when she arrived.

But Billy touched Steve _a_ _lot_. Much more frequently than Max. Billy had always touched Steve, even before Starcourt.

It hadn’t started out as much once they’d settled into the apartment – small pushes to his shoulder, toes buried in his thighs, shoulders pressed together. Gradually it’d become more and more, to the point where Steve didn’t really think about it anymore. He hadn’t known the shoves and comforting hands had been noteworthy until Billy said that he didn’t like being touched. Yet, he touched Steve all the time and let Steve touch him.

Steve tried not to, not wanting to overwhelm him or make him uncomfortable. But he’d put his hand on Billy’s shoulder to guide him down the hallway, or sit against one another on the couch sometimes. More often than not, it was Billy who was touching Steve.

That had to mean something, right?

Billy was looking at him with those narrowed eyes, like he was trying to figure something out. What – Steve had no clue. He just stayed casual, like that would dissuade Billy’s anger.

“Okay.”

Steve looked over at him, his arms crossed tightly, best they could with his cast, eyes still narrowed.

“Okay?”

“Okay I’ll go with you to the Hendersons.” Billy responded, a little aggressively. “But we have to be back because Max is coming over after they’re done at Neil’s.”

“Totally!” Steve smiled. “We’ll bring her back pie. Mrs. Henderson makes the best pie.”

Billy smirked, eyes glinting. Steve cut him off before he could say anything.

“Don’t say something gross.”

“Me? I would never.”

So they went to the Hendersons a few days later. Billy had jeans on, which was a little weird only because Steve hadn’t seen him in like, actual clothing since summer. But he was still dressed on top in a hoodie.

He’d thrown his hair up in a bun and pulled the hood of the sweatshirt up. He looked tight and tense when Steve met him at the door.

“We don’t have to go.”

They didn’t. Claudia and Dustin would understand. They could order food, pizza or chinese, watch tv and play video games until Max came.

Billy just rolled his eyes and shoved Steve out the door.

“I have to get use to it eventually.” Billy said once they were in the car. “Gotta go back to school soon, how can I do that if I can’t make it to fucking Hendersons?”

So, Steve dropped it.

Mrs. Henderson was genuinely nice and very welcoming. The tv was replaying the parade, she had holiday music on low in the background, food spread out on every surface. It was just her and Dustin – she was always happy to have his friends over for dinner.

Billy seemed wildly uncomfortable as soon as they’d entered. Steve wasn’t sure what to do. He knew Billy was too proud to leave, but he wasn’t relaxing like Steve did whenever he walked into this house.

They sat at the small dining table, the air around them filled with Dustin and his mother’s natural back and forth. Once in a while they’d pull Steve or Billy into the conversation, but mostly they were content to just talk.

Billy was tense, shoulders tight, body stiff. Steve sort of moved without thinking. He placed his hand slowly on Billy’s thigh, down by knee.

He caught Billy’s gaze and sent him a small, sympathetic smile. Billy seemed to relax a little at that.

They ate, they laughed – well, _Billy_ didn’t laugh, but that was normal for him – they generally had a merry time. And then Steve asked Mrs. Henderson for some tips on cutting curly hair, fully intending to just do it for Billy when they got home, when she offered to trim it for him.

Billy stared at her for a moment with wide eyes and Steve truly had no idea what Billy was going to say. He didn’t want people touching him, but he hadn’t outright refused either.

Steve just stared at the side of Billy’s face, unsure of what to do. “Uh, Mrs. Henderson, maybe you could just how me on Dustin instead –”

“Steve.” Billy had muttered, gruffer and quieter than his voice normally tended to be. “It’s fine. Just watch her do it for next time.”

Steve waited a beat until Billy’s eyes were on him. They were blue and sharp, his shoulders a bit stiff, but he was adamant so Steve moved back.

“Dusty, go grab the mirror and my scissors for me! Billy, you can come sit right here.”

Mrs. Henderson moved into the kitchen, pulling a chair away from the small table in there and patting it gently for Billy to sit. He hesitated and Steve was a moment away from yelling some excuse over his shoulder and pushing Billy out the door, when Billy moved.

He sat gingerly on the chair, jaw tight, fists clenched. Steve wasn’t sure what to do.

“Billy, dear, would you like to take your sweater off so it doesn’t get hair all over it?”

Billy tensed and Steve was prepared for Billy to flee, but Billy just paused for a long time before pulling the hoodie off and holding it out for Steve. He grabbed it, Billy avoiding his gaze.

Steve hadn’t really seen Billy in anything other than a hoodie since the day they took him home from the hospital. He was currently wearing a grey thermal long sleeved shirt that was just slightly loose on his frame, but very much accentuated those wide shoulders and biceps.

Dustin came clamoring back in with the items his mother asked for and a towel. He handed the towel to Billy, telling him to drape it over his shoulders.

Mrs. Henderson continued chattering – asking Billy how much he’d like cut and complimenting his beautiful golden curls. Billy of yore would’ve _preened_ , now Billy just looked uncomfortable.

His hair really was long. It’d grown out of the mullet and into a full mane over the course of last year. Now it was even less of that and more of a girlish length.

Billy told her to his shoulders and they’d figure it out from there.

He was wildly tense and she hadn’t even started yet. Steve turned to Dustin and asked him quietly to go hangout in the other room.

“Seriously, Steve?” He whined.

“Yeah, you little shit. Seriously.” Dustin eyed him and Steve sent him a patented _babysitter_ look, complete with hands on hips. “He’s uncomfortable and you’re not helping.”

“Ugh.” Dustin rolled his eyes. “It was the _worst_ idea having you two live together. Now you’re all… _friendly_ and _like_ each other. It’s disgusting.”

Steve pushed his shoulder and Dustin reluctantly left the room. Billy was looking at him when Steve turned back around.

“Stevie-dear, come stand over here so you can see how I’ll cut the curls.”

He moved to stand right beside Billy, on the other side of the chair of Mrs. Henderson.

“So you’ll want to cut the curls dry, at most a little damp. Billy’s got much more of a loose curl than Dusty, so it won’t be too difficult to cut on the curve.”

She moved to grab a long curl and Billy’s hand shot out and clamped down on Steve’s wrist. He looked down at Billy, his eyes were closed and his jaw wired tight. Steve moved his other hand, the one that would actually fit with Billy’s and pried his hand off of Steve’s wrist, interlocking their fingers instead.

Billy seemed to relax a little at that, gipping Steve’s hand just shy of really painful, but Steve said nothing. Mrs. Henderson just went on like she hadn’t noticed anything, showing Steve how to hold and cut each curl on a curve.

It went on like that, Mrs. Henderson’s kind voice explaining, Steve watching, and Billy silently baring it until most of the length was gone and Billy looked more like himself again.

“And, there you go.” She fluffed the top curls a little, smiling. “Now, Steve, you’re going to want to invest in some good scissors, household ones just won’t do.”

“I’ll make sure to get some. Thanks, Mrs. H!” Billy was still holding his hand – holding, not gripping any longer. Steve didn’t let go. “We should be heading, Max is set to come over soon.”

Max wouldn’t be at the apartment for another two hours, but Steve knew Billy was done. He wouldn’t just be _holding_ Steve’s hand if he was comfortable.

“Oh! Let me just wrap you up some leftovers!”

She busied herself making Tupperwares and Steve handed Billy the little mirror.

Billy hesitated, but took it with his free hand, the one in the cast. He held it a little wonky because of the cast, but turned his head back and forth to look at his hair.

“Want to go wait in the car while I say bye to Dustin?” Steve murmured quietly for only Billy to hear.

“Yeah.” His voice croaked.

Billy stood from the chair, laying down the mirror and shrugging off the towel. He looked down at all of the hair on the kitchen floor, seemed fixated by it. Steve squeezed his hand to get his attention, Billy looked up and met Steve’s gaze.

They were just staring at each other in the Hendersons kitchen, while Mrs. H flitted around packing up food. Billy didn’t seem like he wanted to let go of Steve’s hand and, honestly, neither did Steve.

But, he knew Billy was done and they wouldn’t be able to leave if Steve didn’t go say goodbye to Dustin. So Steve pulled out his keys with his free hand and held them out to Billy.

Billy pulled his gaze away from Steve’s to look at the keys. He grabbed them with his casted hand.

Steve started walking in the direction of the hallway, Billy stayed still. Their hands tugged, Billy obviously not letting go, so Steve turned back around to look at him.

His face looked annoyed, almost mad. It was such a Billy expression that Steve smiled at him.

“Dustin’s in the living room.”

“Okay.” It rolled out of Billy’s mouth like a question.

Steve smiled a bit bigger. “You’re going to have to let me go if we want to leave.”

Billy dropped Steve’s hand like he was burned and Steve’s smile dropped into a confused frown. He wasn’t sure what he’d done, but it’d absolutely been the wrong move. Billy moved quickly down the hall and out the door, Dustin yelling at him from the couch.

What the hell?

Steve sighed, ran a hang through his hair, and moved the way Billy had to say goodbye to Dustin.

“What the hell, Steve? Your boyfriend just ran out of here like he was on fire.”

Steve rolled his eyes and very much ignored the stuttering of his heart at Dustin’s words.

“We have to go, Max is coming over.”

“Bye, dude. Thanks for coming.”

He stood to hug Steve, Dustin gave great hugs. Mrs. H came in with a bag full of food and a warm smile. She also gave great hugs.

Steve waved at them as he shut the door behind him. Billy was in the car, heat blasting. He wasn’t wearing his hoodie.

Fuck. They’d left it in the kitchen.

Steve put the bag of food in the back seat and shucked off his bomber jacket, handing it to Billy as he slid into the car.

Billy eyed it, eyed Steve’s Henley, but took it. Steve pulled out of the driveway and began down the quiet suburban street, putting his hand out between them silently.

He could feel Billy staring at him, at his empty, open palm, but Steve kept his eyes on the road. Eventually, Billy took Steve’s hand and laced their fingers together like they had been.

Steve felt his heart thumb oddly in his chest. It was stupid, they were just holding hands. Casually. As friends impacted by trauma did, y’know? But, he couldn’t stop the slight flush from overtaking him.

They absolutely did not acknowledge it. They just held hands like that was a normal thing they did until they reached the apartment. They walked up separately, Steve holding the bag of leftovers and Billy unlocked the door with Steve’s keys.

Steve puttered about putting the food away, Billy immediately turned on the tv. Max wouldn’t be there for a while yet.

Once Steve was done unpacking what Mrs. H had given them, he noticed that Billy wasn’t in the living room. The bathroom light was on, but the door was very closed, so Steve sat on the couch to wait.

Eventually Billy came out. He’d shed Steve’s jacket at some point and had traded his jeans for joggers, thermal shirt still present. He sat next to Steve on his side of the couch and they were quiet.

Steve didn’t know what to say. Did he address Billy’s big accomplishment and subsequent freak out? Did he tell Billy he thought his hair looked nice and he’d be ready to trim it next time? Did he try and hold out his hand again?

He didn’t want to push too much, get too greedy. He didn’t want Billy to think he was taking advantage of his fragile state. Billy would _hate_ that Steve had just internally described him as fragile.

“Thank you.” Billy muttered.

“For what?” Steve was honestly asking. What did Billy need to thank him for? He’d barely done anything.

“For making me go. For letting me squeeze your hand like a fucking toddler while she cut my hair. For giving me your jacket.” He listed off like these were all things Steve should know mattered. “You’re a good friend.”

Billy was looking at him with those ocean eyes of his, all vast and depthless, swirling with shit Steve would literally never be able to understand. He held out his hand, because it felt right. Because he wanted to hold Billy’s hand more than anything.

The girls had often described him as _soft_ and apparently that wasn’t a bad thing in teen internet lingo? So, yeah, whatever, Steve was a _soft boy_. He could admit it. He wanted to hold people, stroke their hair, make them feel good.

Billy stared at his open palm for what felt like a long time. But he placed his hand in Steve’s eventually and laced their fingers.

“I like your hair.” Steve said instead of acknowledging the nice things that Billy had thanked him for or the fact that holding hands was something they did now.

Billy snorted, “Thanks, pretty boy. At least now I won’t be going back to school looking like I don’t know what scissors are.”

“Are you okay? With going back to school?” He asked gently, not wanting to push Billy away.

Billy inhaled deeply and let it out through his nose, like he had with cigarette smoke. “I guess.” He ran his free hand over his tired face, the natural movement awkward with the cast. “I have… anxiety about it. But. What am I gonna do? Not fucking graduate?”

Steve ran his thumb over Billy’s hand subconsciously when his voice began the descent into angry.

“We could talk to Owens or the school, see if we could homeschool you for a while, until you’re more ready.”

Billy’s mouth lifted at the corners in s small smile as he squeezed Steve’s hand a bit. “You’re sweet, pretty boy. Sweeter than I deserve.” And Steve didn’t like the sound of that shit _at all_. “But I don’t think I’ll ever feel ‘more ready’. I don’t think I’ll ever feel normal again.”

“Look, I won’t lie to you, Will was possessed two years ago and he’s _still_ dealing with it. He probably always will, you too. But you guys are not alone. You have us, all of us. It’s okay if you’re not normal, none of us are.”

“Yeah, but maybe I want to be normal again.” Billy turned to look at him, hands still tightly intwined. “I fucking _hate_ that I’m terrified all the time, that I get anxiety about just leaving the apartment, that I have to have you as my goddamn security blanket so some nice lady can cut my hair. The thought of someone touching me literally makes my teeth ache, and that… that fucking _sucks_.” He looked away, like Steve’s face was too much for him to bare at the moment. “I don’t give a shit if I’m other people’s version of normal, I just wish I could get back to my own.”

Steve didn’t know what to say. How did he respond to something like that? So, he just squeezed Billy’s hand and ran his thumb over the knuckles until Billy relaxed a bit.

“You’ll get there.” Steve muttered gently. “I know you will.”

Billy looked back at him and Steve wondered when they’d gotten so close. Maybe when Billy had turned to him? Maybe they just hadn’t been all that far away to begin with.

Steve could see all the fading freckles from summertime, the very blue of Billy’s eyes and the bruising beneath that spoke of sleeplessness. He noted the blondish color of his eyebrows but the dark thickness of his lashes, the devastating pink of his lips.

He’d never wanted to kiss someone so badly in his life.

But he wouldn’t. He couldn’t do that to Billy, couldn’t make his pain and anxiety about Steve. He wouldn’t take advantage like that.

Besides, Billy was straight and, in the eyes of almost everyone in Hawkins, so was Steve.

He really didn’t think Billy would appreciate his allegedly straight guy friend macking on him in a time of distress. That was just sleazy.

But they were still close and still staring at each other quietly and their hands were still tightly intertwined. Billy’s eyes _were_ flicking to his lips, looking between them and Steve’s plain brown eyes. But, that was just like, normal dude things. Just friends being bros and all that, no matter that Steve’s skin was _tingling_ and his dick was beginning to _throb_ a little.

Max unlocked the door with her key, yelling into the apartment to announce her presence. They both looked over the back of the couch at her approach, but Steve noted that Billy had not removed his hand.

“How was Neil’s?”

Max sent him a face, plopping down in her designated armchair.

“There’s leftovers from Dustin’s if you’re hungry.” Steve mentioned.

Max’s eyes went from the tv, to Steve, to Billy, then their hands. She didn’t react outwardly, just stood and went to rummage through the fridge, yelling about something her, El, and Will were talking about this morning.

Steve moved to get up to help her fix a plate, made it as far as the end of the couch, Billy’s hand still in his and seeming like he wasn’t about to let go.

“What’re you doing?” Billy asked all annoyed, tugging on Steve’s hand to stall him.

Steve turned his head and raised a questioning brow. “Uh… going to help Max?”

Billy rolled his eyes. “The shitbird’s fine.” He tugged Steve’s hand forcefully, indicating the seat beside him with his head.

Steve rolled his eyes, “You’re such a baby. Fine, I’ll – _oof!_ ”

Before Steve could finish his sentence, Billy had tugged his arm forcefully, essentially pulling Steve down onto the couch. He landed half sprawled on top of Billy – which, _okay_ but also _oh no_.

Before Steve could even scramble off him, Billy scooted and pushed Steve until he was between Billy’s warm body and the arm of the couch, his legs thrown over Billy’s lap, their hands still intwined.

“How many times I gotta tell you to plant your feet, pretty boy.”

Steve was sure he was blushing. He was a man of little dignity at this point, he just hoped the slight tent in his pants wasn’t too obvious.

Max came back with a plate of food and a large glass of soda, raised a brow at their new position, but just rolled her eyes and sat down. She grabbed the remote and put on some silly teen drama she loved.

Steve and Billy said nothing, they stayed in their new position and watched bad tv as Max ate. Billy made snarky comments and Max aggressively rolled her eyes, and Steve could feel himself relaxing further into the couch and into Billy.

He woke to the feeling of fingers carding gently through his hair. His eyes were still closed and sound was still vaguely muffled, but he could sort of tell what was going on. He sighed a little and pushed his face further into the warmth it was in and the fingers stopped briefly but started back up again once he stopped burrowing.

“Stop it, Max.” Billy’s voice said sharply, but quietly and Steve must’ve fallen asleep on the couch.

“Oh my god, stop being so dramatic. Like I’m not going to send this to you for your fucking lock screen.”

Steve was sure they were both rolling their eyes.

“Fucking quit it, Maxine. I mean it.”

And Billy’s voice took on that edge that barred no questions. Steve shivered lightly at the tone and he felt a blanket being pulled over his shoulders.

“Mom’s here.” He could hear Max moving around.

“Tell Susan I said Happy Thanksgiving.”

“I will.”

Steve felt another presence lean over and he knew Max was hugging Billy.

“Bye, shitbird.”

“Bye, fuckhead.” Max said with warmth. “Tell Steve I said bye when he wakes up, if you two are done being disgusting.”

“Get the fuck out of here.” Billy growled, but there was no heat behind it.

Max giggled and Steve heard the door close. It was quiet, the tv playing softly, and it was warm, and the fingers in his hair never stopped.

He woke up again for real sometime later. He blinked awake, his body shifting a little.

He’d was laying on Billy’s shoulder and the couch, his face tucked into Billy’s neck. His arm was thrown around Billy’s chest and his legs were curled over his lap.

He had literally fucking fallen asleep on Billy.

Fuck.

But, Billy’s hand was in his hair, and his other arm was thrown over Steve’s thighs, hand dangerously close to his ass. And Billy, Steve realized with swelling clarity, had a goddamn monster erection pressed against Steve’s thighs.

Holy shit.

Steve kind of moved without thinking, sitting up, eyes blinking blearily and squinting down at Billy. Who looked a little jarred that Steve had awoken so suddenly.

“I’m gonna piss my pants.”

Billy just threw his head back and started laughing and Steve untangled himself from the blanket and Billy, practically running to the bathroom.

Pissing with a hard dick was never fun, but he did actually have to pee. It hadn’t only been an excuse to get himself together a little. He adjusted himself afterwards, hoping it wasn’t wildly obvious how hard his dick was. Cons of having a big dick weren’t limited to not fully being able to conceal erections, but that was a major one.

He went back to the couch as casually as he could, rubbing hands over his tired eyes and sitting next to Billy this time, instead of practically _on top_ of him. Trying _so_ hard not to look down at Billy’s lap and trace the outline of his dick with his eyes.

“You good?” Billy smirked.

They were much closer than they normally sat, their shoulders and thighs nearly flush. Steve stifled a yawn and leaned back on the couch in a more comfortable position.

“I’m so tired.” He turned his head while still in recline to look at Billy. “Why’d you let me sleep for so long?”

“Cause you were exhausted, princess. I wasn’t about to disrupt your slumber – isn’t that how you find your prince?” Billy added cheekily.

Steve rolled his eyes.

“Sorry I fell asleep literally on top of you.”

Did he sound awkward? He hoped he didn’t sound awkward. He was aiming for _casual-cool_. It probably didn’t sound like that, knowing him.

“You looked comfortable.” Billy shrugged. “And you were _out_. Like, El, Will and Mike FaceTimed and you didn’t even wake up.”

“What?” He whined. “Aw, man.”

Billy chuckled, “Don’t worry, I’m sure your little dweebs will call again soon.”

Steve was still sleepy and now that he knew Billy wasn’t weird about Steve being all up close and personal, he felt himself relax again. He should probably just go to bed, but it wasn’t super late and his bed didn’t have Billy – which, continued to be a major bummer in his life. So, he shifted his head a little closer to Billy and looked up at him with pleading eyes that had usually worked on Nancy in the early days.

“Any chance you’d play with my hair again?”

Billy looked down at him with a fond smile. Steve tried to tamp down the swelling in his chest. That was certainly not a smile one saw often on the face of Billy Hargrove.

“You’re such a girl.”

Steve rolled his eyes, “Shut up.”

Billy chuckled, moving one of the throw pillows to his lap, patting it. “Come here. This side is my bad hand, so, lay down.”

Steve didn’t hesitate – hesitation led to awkward silences, which led to rescinded offers, which led to _no homo, amigo._ Steve wasn’t about that life. Plus, he _wanted_ Billy to touch him, so if Billy was offering…

He laid himself down along the couch, head on the pillow in Billy’s lap. Billy chuckled again and Steve loved that dark sound.

“Eager, huh?”

Steve closed his eyes as Billy’s fingers sunk into his hair and began to twist and run through and lightly massage. He relaxed fully, breathing slowing.

“I may be a little touch starved.”

“Aren’t we all.” Billy said quietly some time later, almost like he hadn’t meant for Steve to hear.

——

He ended up falling asleep on Billy again. But this time, he slept through the night. He awoke early, with the sun streaming in and the tv dark. He was on his side, his face smushed into Billy’s stomach. Billy was still seated upright, though his body was a bit more reclined.

Steve looked up at his sleeping face. Billy looked more peaceful when he slept, less harsh, definitely younger. Sometimes Steve forgot how young Billy was; his energy had always read so loud, it was easy to mistake him for older. But he wasn’t, Steve needed to remember that.

Steve’s alarm went off loudly, startling them both. He jumped up to grab his phone off the coffee table, noting the missed texts and calls as he turned off the alarm.

“Shit, I forgot you had to work today.” Billy said groggily.

“You should go lay down.” Steve said, turning to look at him while rubbing at his tired eyes. “I’m sure sleeping like that wasn’t super comfortable, sorry dude.”

“I was comfortable.” Billy said while staring into Steve’s eyes.

Steve felt his cock _throb_.

“Okay. Great. I’m just gonna go get ready for work.”

He stood, running a hand through his, frankly, insane bedhead. Billy snorted.

“Might wanna tame that mane, pretty boy.”

Steve rolled his eyes as he moved toward the bathroom. “It’s because you had your fingers in it all night!”

“Didn’t hear you complaining about my _fingers_ being _in it all night_.” Billy said over the back of the couch, his eyes glinting and tone thick with intention.

Steve just gave him an unimpressed _look_ before shutting the bathroom door. He leaned against it, a blush settling over his cheeks at Billy’s words and the innuendo they’d implied. He started the shower, letting it heat up as he got undressed.

His dick hurt from being hard all night. Because while Billy’s hands had a magically soothing quality to them, that certainly hadn’t stopped him from getting hard at the touch.

When was the last time he’d been touched?

Nancy. Which had been, like, literally a year ago.

Fuck, no wonder he was ready to shoot his load the moment Billy laid his hands on him.

Steve jumped in the shower and didn’t even bother washing anything first, he just reached down and fisted his dick.

He leaned his head back against the tile, eyes closing at the feeling. It was easy to just picture last night just a little differently in his mind – Billy on the couch, thick thighs spread wide, cock out, with Steve on his knees. He’d never sucked a dick before, but he was practically gagging for Billy’s.

He felt his balls tighten as his hand moved faster, his other hand coming down to fondle the fat head and the swollen vein beneath it. It wasn’t going to take long, he’d been hard too long. One thought about Billy’s ridiculous fucking mouth on his cock and Steve was done. His hips stuttered and rutted into his hands, balls tight to his body, dick kicking. He came against the tiles, thick globs sliding down the wall, and Steve had to bite his lip to keep from moaning out loud.

That’s the thing he missed most about living alone. Being able to get loud when he fucked himself.

He didn’t want Billy to hear him – not wanting to make him uncomfortable, but also not wanting to be vulnerable like that with someone he wasn’t dating.

God, when had he turned into such a priss? Because before he’d fallen in love – and Nancy had been his first, and so far, only love – he’d had zero problem sleeping around and being a douchebag. King Steve had been the worst, but he hadn’t been King Steve in a long time.

He scrubbed his hair with shampoo and conditioner, cleaned his body, and hopped out of the shower to change for work. Billy was no longer on the couch when Steve walked out of the bathroom in a towel, but his door was open and their eyes met as Steve walked by.

Billy’s gaze went from his eyes to trail down Steve’s wet body to the towel he was practically clutching around his hips. Steve felt his cheeks heat at the attention. He kept walking.

They didn’t talk about their little slumber party when he got home from work. They didn’t talk about it in the days following either.

Steve wasn’t going to bring it up – the softness and the clinginess and the erections. Not that he’d bring that bit up anyway, because for all Steve knew that wasn’t even aimed toward him. A warm body’s a warm body, after all.

But things went on as normal. Billy still sat with Steve, albeit closer than before, touched him frequently, still fought with Max and picked on Dustin whenever he was over.

And then Thanksgiving break was over and it was time for Billy to return to school.

The first day back, Steve wasn’t working until the afternoon, but he was up to make sure Billy was good and to give him a ride. They hadn’t really talked about his car situation, Billy hadn’t even asked about the Camaro once since they came to see him in the hospital. Hop had it on the cabin’s property, it was smashed to shit but no one had felt right getting rid of it.

Steve made Billy a coffee and had taken some muffins from the café for this exact purpose. He sipped at his own coffee, sitting at the little breakfast bar as he waited.

Billy came out eventually. He looked annoyed and grouchy, but dressed for school in regular clothes, as he sat down at the counter next to Steve.

Honestly, Steve wasn’t sure what to do? If he should get up or say something or just stay quiet. He didn’t want to worsen Billy’s bad mood. But Billy just grabbed his coffee and pulled the muffin closer and leaned his shoulder _heavily_ against Steve’s.

He didn’t say anything as Billy tore apart the muffin and ate small bites of it, and he definitely didn’t move from Billy’s weight. He just sipped his coffee and let Billy lean against him for as long as he wanted.

Billy got up once he was done destroying his muffin and his mug was empty. Steve just looked at him as he rounded the island to put his mug in the sink. He caught Billy’s gaze when he turned around, eyes going a little soft as he took in Steve’s sleepy appearance.

“Are you okay?” Steve asked softly, adjusting his glasses and then running a hand through his bedhead, like the nervous tick it was.

Billy sucked in a deep breath through his nose, held it, before letting it out harshly. “Yeah. I’m fine, pretty boy.”

Steve eyed him for a minute before getting up and grabbing his keys. He wasn’t going to push Billy, not today. If he said he was alright, Steve had no choice but to believe him.

“Ready?”

Steve had expected some cheesy line like, _as I’ll ever be_ or for Billy to get annoyed that Steve would have the audacity to check in on him. He did not expect Billy to stop and blatantly stare at him.

“You’re taking me to school?”

Steve looked over at him in confusion. “Uh, obviously?”

Billy’s gaze dragged over him slowly and Steve tried not to get a hard-on in his fucking sweatpants at the sight of Billy looking him up and down the way he was.

“You’re gonna go out like _that?_ ”

“Like what?” Steve asked, a little put out as he looked down at himself.

It was early, he didn’t have any plans besides taking Billy to school and then coming back here to worry about Billy and take a nap. Who cared if he was in joggers and a soft, threadbare t-shirt – that, now while he was looking at it, might actually be Billy’s? Whatever, not the point. They may technically be the clothes he slept in, but his pants were expensive and actually meant to be worn outside. And, so what if his hair was all wild and product free? And that he was in his glasses, which he never really wore?

Billy’s hot gaze dragged over him again as he shook his head. “All soft and sleepy and _cute_.” Billy practically spat out. “You’re gonna cause a damn riot.”

Steve just rolled his eyes at Billy’s words and hoped his flush wasn’t too noticeable. “Shut up.”

Billy just shook his head as be grabbed his bag by the door and made his way downstairs, Steve trailing after him. “Fucking ridiculous.” He mumbled to himself as they made their way to the car.

The ride to the school wasn’t as long as Steve would’ve liked. He was nervous for Billy. Worried that something would happen and Steve wouldn’t be there to help him. It was dumb, Billy was astoundingly capable, he didn’t actually _need_ Steve as much as he thought he did.

Steve parked in his old spot, mostly out of habit. It was early enough that the lot was mostly empty. Billy was tense beside him, staring straight ahead at the building in front of them.

“Guess you were wrong.” Steve said gently and waited for Billy to look at him with furrowed brows before continuing. “Not a riot in sight.”

Billy snorted and shook his head at Steve’s idiocy. A small smile tucked into the corners of his mouth. “That’s just because no one’s alerted the media that _King Steve_ is here.”

He brought his phone up before Steve could process what he was doing. He smirked a little, not like he used to, but similar enough, and opened the door of the car before Steve could even think to say anything.

“Hey.” Steve waited until he looked up from grabbing his bag to speak again. “Let me know if you need anything, alright?”

Billy just eyed him for a moment, almost like he was taking Steve in. Then he got out of the car. “Will do, Stevie.”

_Stevie_.

That was certainly the first time Billy had ever called him _that_. No one called him that. No one ever had except Mrs. Henderson and Tommy, and he was almost positive Tommy had never said it as softly or meaningfully as Billy had just done.

He waited until Billy entered the building, until he couldn’t see him anymore, before he went home. It was weird now, being in the apartment without Billy. He wasn’t used to it anymore.

His phone _pinged_ as he laid back down in bed. Billy had tagged him in a Instagram story. _Of fucking course_. Billy doesn’t post for like, six months and the first thing he decides to grace the world with upon his reacquaintance with social media is _Steve_.

It was the photo he hadn’t realized Billy had taken in the car. Steve had one hand on the wheel, the other around the back of the passenger seat. He was smiling at Billy, hair loose and wild, eyes all soft behind his glasses.

It was a good picture. Made him look attractive and approachable – like how Max and El and Will talked about that one actor they were all obsessed with. But it was _intimate_. There was no hiding that. It looked like the picture you’d take of your _boyfriend_ and post it to make all your friends jealous.

He knew that was very much _not_ what Billy was doing. But, _god_ , did it feel that way.

His phone immediately began blowing up – Nancy, Robin, Dustin, _Max_ – all messaging him about Billy’s post. El just sent him a string of question marks.

Steve ignored them in favor of staring at the photo. Billy had typed – _your babysitter could never @kingsteve –_ and that was fairly innocuous, considering the things Billy used to spew. But that didn’t stop a little thrill from sliding down his spine.

Thought about it the whole time he waited at home. Thought about it as he pulled up to the school.

Robin was out first, strutting over to him like she was on a mission. He was leaning against the driver’s side door as she approached.

“How was he? Did you see him today? I tried not to text him.”

Robin stopped in front of him and rolled her eyes. “We have a couple classes together. He seemed alright, which means I’m sure he wasn’t. Just ask him yourself, dingus.” She opened the back seat and threw her bag in. “Now, what the fuck was that story this morning?”

It was Steve’s turn to roll his eyes. “I didn’t post it, why would I have any idea?”

Robin just stared at him with narrowed eyes, looking like she was _dying_ to say something but very much holding herself back. Billy showed up before she could continue.

He looked exhausted and more than annoyed – shoulders tense and jaw tight. That may have been because people were staring and whispering as he stalked past them. Once he made it to the car, he opened the passenger side and got in without a word. Steve and Robin shared a look before Steve got in as well.

“Hey.” Steve started gently. Billy had his arms crossed tight over his chest, uncaring of the bulky cast, eyes hard. Robin, thankfully, had not gotten in the car yet, giving them a minute.

Before Steve could say anything else, Billy’s hand shot out and grabbed one of Steve’s, lacing it aggressively with his own, even going so far as to tug Steve’s arm so it was pressed against Billy’s ribs, so more of Steve was touching him.

Steve didn’t say anything, just let Billy aggressively hold his hand as he stared out the front window, rubbing his thumb over Billy’s knuckles. He hoped it was soothing, hoped it was helping to calm Billy down.

Eventually Robin slid into the backseat and started chattering at Steve about whatever annoying teacher had grievanced her this time. Steve chattered back, nothing substantial, just noise mostly.

He started the car when it was getting too close for them not to leave, and drove one-handed over to the other lot to grab the kids. Billy didn’t say anything as they pulled up, but he also didn’t let go of Steve’s hand, though he was no longer tugging Steve’s arm to his body.

The kids tumbled out and literally _raced_ over, Max pushing the boys out of the way. She threw open the passenger door and Steve felt his gut tug, wanting to maybe tell her not to prod at Billy, but that wasn’t his place. Max was Billy’s sister, he wasn’t about to put himself between them.

Max looked at Billy’s tense shoulders and his hand tightly gripping Steve’s. She didn’t say anything as the boys caught up and began fighting with each other and Robin on where to sit. She just sat on the edge of Billy’s seat, gently hip checking him until Billy scooted over and they were sharing a seat.

Max leaned her body against Billy’s, lying her head on his shoulder, ignoring the boys yelling in the back. Billy still held Steve’s hand, but slowly his shoulders began to relax.

They drove to the café, parked in their spot in the back, and Robin lead the boys into the café before her shift started. Steve and Max sat in the car with Billy as the rest of them left. Max spoke first.

“How was school?” She was still laying against him, so she wasn’t looking at his face when she asked.

“Fine.” Billy said eventually. “A lot.”

“Do you want to go upstairs? I have a little while before my shift starts.” Steve asked quietly.

Billy nodded and Max got out, Steve waited for Billy to let go of his hand.

“You don’t have to babysit me.” Billy said, not aggressively, but not calmly either, finally meeting Steve’s gaze.

Once again, Steve was struck with responding as Billy would instead of falling into his normal doe-eyed expression. “But I’m your babysitter,” He said with a small smile. “Your instagram told me so.”

Billy rolled his eyes, but smirked a little, squeezing Steve’s hand before letting it go and getting out of the car. Steve followed them up and watched Max forgo her seat on the armchair and sit on Billy’s end of the couch.

Billy didn’t say anything, just sat down in the middle and looked at Steve, waiting for him.

And who was Steve to disappoint him?

He had a little while before he had to be downstairs, he could sit with Billy until then.

So he went to his side of the couch and sat down, closer than farther. He’s on Billy’s bad side, the side with the cast, so he doesn’t reach out to hold Billy’s hand again. He just leans his shoulder into Billy’s as Max chatters about school while turning on weird house hunting shows Billy now also likes.

He sits there with Billy and Max until he literally can’t anymore. Gets up, grabs his apron, and smiles warmly down at the two grumps on his couch.

“I’ll be downstairs if you need anything.”

The synchronized eye roll was kind of neat.

Robin was already behind the counter when get got downstairs, the kids at their designated table playing _D &D_ and doing homework.

Literally all of their parents, apart from Mrs. Wheeler, worked and so very much appreciated Steve picking them up and letting them hang out at the café after school for a while. Eventually someone would come get them, but Steve was fine to keep an eye out while he made coffee and sandwiches.

“Steve!” Dustin shouted, not even having the decency of looking sheepish as he darted over to Steve. “Buddy, what the hell was that in the car? Is Billy like, _okay_?”

Steve was tying on his apron and moved around the counter as Dustin followed him. “He’s fine. Just his first day back at school.”

“Yeah, that’s gotta suck.” Dustin said with enough sincerity as he leaned against the counter that Steve could tell he meant it.

Will appeared next to him, looking so tall. God, they all were getting so tall. “How’s Billy?” He asked gently.

“He’s alright.” Steve said seriously, looking into Will’s eyes – the depth of this kid’s understanding never ceased to amaze him.

“I thought you said he was _fine_.” Dustin perked up from beside him.

Steve rolled his eyes. “Relax, man.” He looked back to Will. “He’s upstairs with Max if you wanna go talk to him. Might be good to hear from someone who’s been there before, y’know?”

_Zombie Boy_ rang out without anyone having to say it.

Will just nodded, turning to go. “Oh!” He looked back at Steve. “Call Jonathan? He’s been bugging me about how much he misses you and I guess you haven’t been texting him back or something?”

Shit. He had been sort of ignoring everyone in favor of Billy. Not that he meant to, Billy just took up a lot space in his life at the moment. It was easy to forget that Jonathan was alone now since Nancy left for school in August.

It had been a big thing when she left – Nancy and Jonathan had planned on New York and they had planned on going together, but then Jonathan had deferred from art school for a year, not ready to leave Will and Joyce so soon after everything, and Nancy went anyway – he’d had both of them calling him separately to rant about the other, it’d been a lot.

He needed to give Jonathan a call, see how he was doing

“I will.” He promised and Will just smiled gently before going upstairs.

Dustin was still leaning against the counter, watching Steve. “He’s okay though?” He asked a bit more lightly than before.

Steve just let out his breath, looking at his kid softly. “Yeah, he’s okay.”

“Good.” Dustin nodded before returning to the group table.

Steve watched him go, smiling at Robin’s playful eye roll, and felt happier than he had in a long time.


	2. one life for yourself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much, your response to this has been nothing short of incredible & lovely! I’m having such a great time with this piece and absolutely love hearing all your thoughts! Because someone asked, the title & chapter titles are from You Only Live Twice by Beulahbelle.

Eventually Billy asked about the Camaro.

They’d kept up their routine for a while – Steve would drive him to school, occasionally one of the kids if they a morning AV Club meeting, then pick everyone up and bring them the café.

Billy usually went upstairs when they got home, but sometimes he’d come in with the kids and bother Steve while he worked.

He wasn’t really back to the Billy of yore, he didn’t _swagger_ about or try to be the loudest in the room. But he did smirk a bit more openly these days and threw out teasing barbs here and there. It was nice, to see Billy feeling better, to see him less withdrawn and quiet.

And right before Christmas Break, he asked about the car.

Steve had been sitting at the breakfast bar, sipping at his coffee and scrolling on his phone while Billy made grilled cheese.

“Whatever happened to the Camaro?”

Steve had looked up from his phone, all doe-eyed like Billy enjoyed teasing him about. Billy wasn’t looking at him though. He was staring at the stove as he flipped the bread, acting all nonchalant.

“Uh, it’s at Hop’s. Last I checked.”

Billy slid the sandwich onto a plate and put it in front of Steve. “It’s been there this whole time?”

“Well, yeah. Hopper had it towed out there after the mall, but I mean, it’s beat to shit.” The _because I t-boned you_ and _Nancy shot out your windshield_ left unsaid. “We’ll have to get it worked on if you’re planning on driving it.”

He tried not to feel sad about the prospect of not driving Billy around anymore. That car had been his escape from Neil’s house, his freedom and lifeline, Steve wasn’t about to keep that from him. But, not picking Billy up might break his heart a little.

“I can fix it.” Billy said determinedly. He took in Steve’s raised brows and amended – “Most of it.”

So, Steve took Billy out to Hopper’s cabin to get a look at his car. It was sitting under a tarp, parked beside the Chief’s jeep. Hop and El met them outside.

El seemed pretty elated to see them. Particularly Billy. Her hair was done up in space-buns and she was definitely wearing a mish-mosh of Max and Mike’s clothes. It should look ridiculous, but somehow nothing El did ever looked ridiculous.

“Steve!” She shouted excitedly. “Billy! Hi!”

“Hey El.” Steve smiled warmly, accepting her hug as soon as they were close enough. Waving at Hop over her body. “Hey Chief.”

“Kid.” Hopper nodded, turning to look at Billy and gentling his tone in a way that didn’t seem patronizing in the slightest. “Hey kid, how you doing?”

Billy nodded, keeping his gaze somewhere in the middle of Hopper’s throat. “Alright. Sir.” He seemed to add at the last minute.

Hop waved him off, “None of that shit, kid. Call me Hop, or Jim, or Chief if you’re feeling particularly respectable.” He shot a look at Steve, who was still holding El to him. “Like that one.”

Billy snorted. “Yeah, he’s real respectable, alright.”

“Hey.” Steve pouted. “I was raised in a country club, I am the pillar of respect.”

Both Billy and Hopper shook their heads at him and then went about ignoring him as Hop pulled back the tarp and showed Billy the damage.

“Come inside with me?” El asked sweetly – and how could he ever refuse her?

They went inside and Steve sat at the kitchen table with her looking over her schoolwork. Hopper was gonna let her start school in September, but she was just _so_ behind. They’d set up homeschooling for a year to see how much she could catch up on.

El talked about Mike and Max and Will. She talked about school work and the book she was attempting to read. She asked about Billy, and the things her and Will spoke about in regards to him.

Eventually Billy and Hopper made their way inside, taking up Hop’s offer to stay for dinner. Billy found himself next to El, looking over her school work, helping her with whatever she was having trouble with. Billy spoke in a low, soothing voice. He never got frustrated by her not understanding or having to reexplain something. And El finished her work for the night as they ate dinner, Billy by her side.

Hop walked them out after, stopped Billy before he could slide into Steve’s car.

“Look, you’re gonna be out here a lot, fixing that thing. I got a proposition, if you’re interested.” He ducked his head a little to catch Billy’s gaze, carefully. “You’re real good with her. With El. She’s been having a real hard go of it and I’ve never been that smart, I’m doing the best I can to help her, but obviously it’s slow going. I’ll tell you what, you help her with school when you come out to fix that thing and I’ll call a buddy of mine at the auto shop to fix the rest of it. Deal?”

Billy looked more than shocked by Hopper’s proposal, but accepted it with a nod of his head and a handshake.

That’s mostly how they spent their Christmas Break.

Steve and Hop and El had made a makeshift workspace for Billy by stringing up tarps in the trees to keep snow from falling on Billy as he worked. Sometimes Steve sat out there with him as he tinkered with the engine, or whatever, sometimes it was El, most of the time it was Max. She seemed the most capable of helping him with the car, anticipated the things he needed before he asked, kept him talking and snarky and chuckling out in the cold.

Max came with them a lot when they drove out to the Hopper’s. Mostly to help Billy, but other times she bypassed her brother completely in favor of El. The girls giggled and chattered and did school work and made bad TikToks, like kids did.

True to his word, Billy helped El with school, was patient and kind as corrected her mistakes or explained something she couldn’t understand.

It was odd to see Billy like this and think of the guy he use to be. The guy who rolled into town over a year ago with a bad attitude and an abundance of self-hatred.

But, when Steve thought of the Billy who sat with him in the middle of the night after Steve’s nightmares or the Billy who held his hand or the one who refused to move if Max fell asleep on him, who let the kids put on whatever tv show they wanted and talk back to him about music – that guy, that guy made sense with the one sitting before him.

That was the guy Steve _liked_.

Because he _liked_ Billy. There was no ‘crush’ anymore. Steve wanted Billy. He wanted to _date_ Billy. He could fall _in love_ with Billy, he was certain of it.

Fuck, maybe he already had?

Well, that… sucked.

Especially since he had to watch Billy be all _helpful_ and _attentive_ and _attractive_. It was rude and obnoxious, is what it was. Unfair.

Christmas Eve his parents always made sure they were home, no matter how old Steve got. Christmas Day was free reign, his parents usually spent it at the country club having dinner with friends.

So, he spent Christmas Eve having dinner with his parents, listening to them talk about work and their friends and whatever great thing their friend’s children had managed to accomplish and _that could be you, Steven, if you applied yourself a little more_. They asked about work and his friends, his mom had met Robin but not Billy, and if he was still babysitting for the police Chief and the Wheelers.

They knew things about his life, a lot of it was just slightly out of date. But he kind of preferred it that way, they couldn’t judge what they didn’t know.

Overall, it wasn’t a horrible affair. He did miss his parents and it was nice to spend some time with them. Nice to be pulled into a hug by his mother and share a glass of the good scotch with his father. He wished so deeply sometimes that he was the man they wanted him to be, that he was capable of living up to their expectations. He wanted them to be proud of him, wanted their support.

But, he’d learned a long time ago to take what he could get from them. They seemed to do the same in return. Just easier that way.

He left that night with a hefty check in his Christmas card and a couple bags of expensive clothes from his mother. A pretty standard Harrington Christmas haul these days.

Billy was waiting up for him. Their dumb little fake tree – courtesy of Robin – lit up in the corner and casting Billy in a warm glow.

“Hey.” Steve sighed, setting his bags under the tree and throwing himself down on the couch next to Billy.

“How was Casa de Harrington?” Billy asked with a smirk.

Steve turned to him with a blank stare that said it all and Billy laughed. And… Billy wasn’t wearing a hoodie?

He wasn’t even wearing one of the long sleeved thermals he was fond of. Or one of his old band t-shirts that Steve may or may not have been pilfering to sleep in.

No, he was sitting on the couch beside Steve in a _tank top_.

Like, a _tight_ one.

And all the silver-ish scars mottled through tan skin on display.

He hadn’t seen Billy’s scars since he’d helped him put the shirt on at the hospital the day they took him home. He’d been mostly bandaged then, the lines all red. Now they looked… soft, barely there.

He wasn’t sure if Billy had been _hiding_ them, or if he’d just genuinely been cold, but Steve hadn’t so much as seen his forearms since September. And here he was, basically on display. For Steve.

“That good, huh?” Billy pulled him out of his ogling.

Steve groaned and laid his head back against the cushion. “No, it was _fine_. It’s always fine. Just…” He sighed. “Y’know?”

“I think I get ya, Stevie.” Billy rumbled softly.

“When do you think Max’ll be over tomorrow?”

Billy shrugged, but Steve could see the tension under that easy gesture. “Probably not until later.”

Steve nodded, then smiled, eyes glinting, and Billy narrowed his own in suspicion. “Since we don’t have be up early tomorrow, wanna get drunk?”

Billy laughed, his smiling lingering as he looked at Steve and Steve’s waggling eyebrows. “You’re fucking ridiculous, you know that?”

“Yeah, but you didn’t answer the question.”

“Obviously I want to get drunk with you, what kind of question even is that?”

So Steve pulled out whatever bottles they had hidden away and the beer from the fridge, laying it out on the coffee table in front of them.

Billy was still on medication, so much less than before, but Steve still had the passing thought that maybe he shouldn’t be drinking. But Billy was his own person, and while Steve wanted to be a good friend, he wasn’t about to dictate what Billy did. Besides, apparently Owens made some comment about how his tolerance may be different now – Billy seemed to take that as the doctor’s okay. It probably wasn’t.

Billy cracked open a beer and handed it to Steve before opening one for himself. They talked while they drank, about Christmas at the Harringtons and Max, about how the Camaro was coming along and how smart El was despite what she may think now.

Billy started pouring them fingers of whatever bottle he grabbed at, and they were laughing at Robin’s current attempt to woo their coworker and how Jonathan was actually really funny when he wasn’t stressed out and the last time Dustin was over and accidentally flipped the fucking couch in his excitement. They howled and slapped each other while they laughed.

The more liquor they drank, the more fuzzy and warm Steve became. It was familiar territory – he’d grown up in a small midwestern town, all there was to do on weekends were get drunk at house parties or bonfires – he just hadn’t done it in a while.

Billy seemed totally at ease, comfortable. He was leaning into Steve, petting his hair, smiling wide with glassy blue eyes. Steve just basked in the attention. Billy was _nice_ , he felt _amazing_.

“Will’s in love with Mike.” Billy said quietly.

Steve turned his head, eyes wide. “ _Shut up_. He _told_ you that?” Billy nodded, taking another sip. “I mean, I’ve had my suspicions that he was, not straight, but I figured it was best to keep that to myself.”

“I mean, he’s kind of obvious. I woulda known even if he hadn’t told me.” Billy shrugged, like it was casual information.

“Why did he tell you?” Steve asked, then realized it sounded a little harsh. “I know you two have gotten close.” He amended.

Billy shrugged, taking another sip. “Will knows that I… uh, that I’ve been in a similar boat, I guess. Just felt comfortable telling me or whatever.”

“That’s important. That they feel comfortable with you.” Steve nodded seriously, before smiling a little wickedly. “You in love with your best friend, Hargrove?” He leaned a little closer, playfully, Billy stopped breathing. “Funny, I seem to remember Max telling me you didn’t have any friends.”

At that, Billy shook himself out of whatever daze he’d been in and rolled his eyes, shoving a laughing Steve out of his space. “Shut up, Harrington. I may not’ve been _King Steve_ , but I did just fine.”

Steve fell back against the arm of the couch, laughing, and feeling a little slow motion. He was drunk and Billy was _funny_ , so he laid back against the arm of the couch, splayed out, and laughed.

“What’s so funny?” Billy asked.

“Y-you!” Steve giggled.

Billy moved into the spot left open between Steve’s legs, leaning down over him. “Is that so?”

“Yeah, man. You’re fucking _funny_. You make me laugh all the time.” Steve smiled up at him, feeling a shiver zip up his spine at the feeling of Billy above him.

“I think you’re fucking drunk, Harrington.”

“No.” Steve pouted, doe-eyes making an appearance as he looked up at Billy. “No _Harrington_. I like when you call me Steve.”

Billy looked down at him, a fond little look that Steve was seeing more and more of. Billy fell closer and Steve couldn’t help up raise his chin a little, breath beginning to speed up.

“Is that right, pretty boy?”

Steve let out a shaky breath, couldn’t pull himself away from the _blue blue blue_ of Billy’s eyes.

“I like when you call me pretty.” Steve all but whispered.

Billy’s hips gave some sort of spasm as he head dropped. “Fuck, Steve.”

When he brought his head back up, they were so much closer than before and Steve couldn’t help the little panting breaths as Billy leaned this close. They stared at one another, and Steve wasn’t sure who leaned when, but suddenly their lips were pressing gently and he was _kissing Billy Hargrove_.

It was so slow and so gentle, a barely there pressure. Billy let his body drop atop Steve’s and his weight felt _amazing_. Billy’s hand was on his jaw, thumb pushing lightly into the bone to angle Steve’s head just so.

Steve _loved_ kissing, always had. Kissing someone was one of his favorite things – surrounded gently by soft lips, slick and warm. And this was _Billy_.

Billy lying on top of him. Billy holding his jaw and licking deep into his mouth. Lips warm and languidly moving over his.

Steve felt strung out. He was drunk and the hazy quality made it feel like a dream. He couldn’t help the way his legs hugged Billy’s hips, the way he could help the slow grind of his own in response. Billy’s hips met his with gentle pressure while he kissed him, and Steve felt like he could honestly come just like this – slow and warm with the only the gentle rocking of their hips to push him over.

He’d never wanted anything more than to come with Billy on top of him, kissing him just as he was right now.

Steve literally had no idea how long they’d been kissing, no idea how long they’d been lying on top of each other. Steve sighed into Billy’s mouth, the most comfortable he’d ever been.

Billy’s hips dipped down into his just a little harder, body shaking slightly as he bit at Steve’s lower lip and let out a shaky breath into Steve’s mouth. Steve felt the warm spread of Billy’s come seeping over his clothed cock and Steve rutted up into his hips a bit harder, whining softly into Billy’s mouth as he came himself.

Billy kissed him through it and kept kissing him after. Steve’s hands unclenched from Billy’s warm shoulders, sliding down his back and dipping under his tank top to grip at Billy’s lower back to keep him there. It was unnecessary, Billy very obviously had no intention of moving.

They kissed for a long while after, just lying and breathing and licking languidly. Billy kissed him slowly and softly, but _deeply_ , like he was trying to consume Steve, like he was trying to swallow him whole.

Eventually, Steve’s eyes became too heavy to keep open longer than a blink, and Billy’s kisses slowed, their hands no longer wandering.

Billy kissed gently the corner of Steve’s lips, his cheek, his jaw, and finally his neck. Steve sighed pleasantly, his eyes closed and neck arched to give Billy more room.

“Steve.” Billy all but whispered. Steve blinked his eyes open to look at him. Fuck, Billy was beautiful. “Time for bed, pretty boy.”

Steve let out a little whine, closing his eyes and wrapping his arms around Billy’s back to keep him there. “No. You feel so good.”

Billy tucked his face into Steve’s neck, just breathing him in, the fingers of his good hand carding gently through Steve’s hair.

They laid like that for a while, and Steve very well may have actually fallen asleep, because Billy was whispering in his ear and Steve really didn’t remember what he was saying.

“– you’re perfect, and _so_ good, Stevie. Don’t ever leave me.”

“Mm. I won’t.” Steve whispered back, eyes still closed.

Billy placed a sweet little kiss on his neck, then moved away from Steve’s body, ignoring Steve’s whine as he lifted up. “Come on, Stevie. Time for bed.”

Steve groaned, but let Billy pull him up off the couch. Steve grabbed him in a hug as soon as he was standing, his arms wrapped around Billy’s ribs and leaned his face down to burrow in Billy’s neck. Billy just smoothed his hand down Steve’s back, holding Steve to him just as tight. They stood there for a moment, wrapped up in one another, simply hugging. Eventually, Billy started walking them down the hall to Steve’s room.

“Come on, Stevie. Lay down.”

Steve let go, reluctantly, and burrowed down into his unmade bed. He unbuttoned his jeans and kicked them off, pulling the polo over his head and tossing it as well. He pulled the blanket around himself and couldn’t even blink his eyes open. He fell asleep quickly and, maybe he wouldn’t feel this way in the morning, but it’s the best he’d felt in a long time.

——

When Steve woke the next morning, hung over and wearing boxers _literally_ sticking to his skin, he was like, _what the fuck_. But almost immediately, last night comes back to him _so_ clearly.

He kissed Billy.

They made out and Steve came in his pants like he was twelve and then Billy put him to bed.

_Holy fuck_.

Steve grabbed some clean sweats, cracked open his door and listened. He could hear Billy clanking around in the kitchen, the living room tv already on and murmuring low. Steve slunk into the bathroom, grabbed some ibuprofen from the cabinet, and jumped in the shower. The cool water felt good on his warm skin and eased the pounding in his head. He scrubbed at the dried come on and around his dick, fucking embarrassing.

Once he was dressed and clean, he stumbled out into the living room, dropping down at the breakfast bar and laying his head on the cool counter.

Billy placed something down by his head and by the smell it was the too strong coffee that Steve always made after a long night. Steve let out a groan and then mumbled a _thanks_ without picking up his head.

He heard Billy snort, then groan. Steve laid there for a moment before slowly picking his head up and taking a sip of the coffee. Steve actually sort of hated black coffee, but when he was hungover having it light or sweet was just too much.

“How many fucking bottles did we go through last night? Fuck.” He looked over at the coffee table, where the mess of last night was still evident.

“I think it was the mixing.” Billy said gruffly, leaning against the sink, sipping his own coffee. “Rookie move.”

He looked just as exhausted as Steve, and the look was terrible, not even someone as attractive as Billy could make hungover a good look.

He wondered if Billy remembered anything from last night, Steve didn’t want to risk ruining things between them because drunk Steve couldn’t keep his fucking hands to himself.

Billy was his best friend, different from the way Robin was his best friend, different from Nance and Jonathan. He was _in love_ with him – Steve could admit that now. Honestly, Steve was surprise he hadn’t _told_ Billy last night.

But, Billy wasn’t acting any different. He didn’t seem mad at Steve for kissing him, and he also didn’t seem like he was about to declare any undying feelings for him either. He’d made Steve coffee, so, that was something.

And, yeah, there were things Steve’s memory was fuzzy on. He very clearly remembered their descent into drunkenness, the way Billy had _kissed_ him and _kept_ kissing him, the way they’d come against each other, and that Billy had helped him get to bed. But it was all washed over in a hazy glaze. He didn’t remember things in between, couldn’t recall how he’d gotten into bed or what he’d said after he came.

Steve knew that they made out for a long time and eventually Billy had helped him to his room. But the _specifics_ of that were blurry.

He wasn’t really sure what he expected Billy’s reaction to be – in either case – but for the most part he just seemed like… Billy. He seemed hungover and exhausted and _normal_.

Steve didn’t really know what to do with that, so he was just going to feel out Billy in this situation.

“And to think,” Steve started. “We used to be the keg kings.”

Billy just let out a small sigh and shook his head. “ _Rip_ to us.”

Steve snorted and sipped the coffee Billy made as he waited for his head to stop throbbing.

They sat around for a while, miserable and groaning, before moving to clean up the living room before Max could come over and judge them. Steve tried not to look at the couch and blush.

Billy laid there while Steve pulled out the fancy clothes his mother had bought him for Christmas, declining to try them on and give Billy a fashion show. Billy swiped a least three of the fancy sweaters and Steve couldn’t wait to see Billy in them.

Max came over later in the day, swirling in like a mini hurricane, ranting about some Neil-related drama as Steve started dinner. She gave them presents while Steve was cooking – some fancy new hydro-flask for when Billy returned to the gym and new silly stickers for Steve’s computer, something all the kids loved to get him. Steve had gotten Max stickers for her skateboard and a special pack of scrunchies she’d been eyeing and Billy had given her some new headphones that she wanted.

They ate, watched some weird Christmas movie that was apparently tradition between Billy and Max, and then Steve drove Max home.

When he got back to the apartment, Billy wasn’t in the living room. He was in bed, door open, light on, but absolutely passed out. Steve slid into his room and did the same.

They didn’t talk about it in the days that followed. So, Steve was resigned to the fact that Billy didn’t remember. Or, worse, he did remember but didn’t want Steve to know that he did.

That had to be a possibility, Steve would be stupid to think it wasn’t. Steve may be in love with Billy, but it was very, very likely that he didn’t feel that way about Steve _at all_. Billy had never really given Steve any indication that he was anything less than straight, or that he even _liked_ Steve in that way.

They were close, that much was obvious. Billy _trusted_ him. He sought out Steve for comfort. Steve was not about to take advantage for that. He wasn’t going to push Billy into something just because Steve was _aching_ for it.

Which was why Steve found himself as _far away_ from Billy as he could make himself on New Years Eve.

They were at the Byers – which, was only a little weird, considering the only time they’d ever been here together was the time Billy fucking _laid him out_. Billy seemed to be thinking of that too, leaning into Steve’s body almost like an apology.

Nancy was home for break and pulled Steve away from Billy and the kids, wanting to spend some quality time with him for a change. He let her drag him over to the couch and tell him everything about school that she’d said when they FaceTimed and everything she hadn’t. Jonathan sat on his other side, leaning into him in a different way than Billy did, but still seeking comfort from Steve’s body in the tactile way they’d all become.

Billy was at the kitchen table with Max and El and Will, Dustin was fighting Mike and Lucas about whatever they were attempting to explain to Robin where they all sat by the tv. Joyce and Hopper were sneaking a cigarette outside the front door.

Steve felt more comfortable here, with these people, than he ever felt in his own home.

He stayed with Nancy and Jonathan as the ball dropped, Robin bouncing over to lay one on him, laughing as she knocked him over and they crashed to the floor in a mess of limbs.

“Ugh, see, that’s what I get when I try to be hetero.”

“Pain and embarrassment.” Billy snarked.

“See, he gets me.” Robin said as she hauled Steve up from the ground.

He hadn’t wanted to be tempted to like, kiss Billy or something during the drop, which was why he’d stayed away. But the deep stare he was giving Steve was almost worse.

But, they didn’t talk about it.

Christmas break ended, and Nancy went back to school, and so did everyone else. Steve and Robin worked, and the kids hung around, and Billy was Billy. Constantly at Steve’s side and looking at him like he wanted to say something, but never did.

——

It was a few weeks into January when Billy got his cast off.

Steve had driven him to the appointment and went in with him for Owens to take it off. He told Billy to start physical therapy and okayed him for more strenuous activity apart from his bad arm.

So Billy did his P.T. and started going to the gym again. He made Steve come with him on runs, either in the early morning or late at night. He worked on the Camaro and continued to help El with school. And Hop – true to his word – had the car towed to his buddy’s garage and introduced Billy to Tim.

Tim took a look around the Camaro, of what Billy had managed to fix on his own – one handed, Hop made sure to add – and offered him a job after school.

It was weird having Billy and Robin in school all day while he worked at the coffee shop, but two o’clock would roll around and Billy’s Camaro would fly downtown and park behind the building. They’d come in, Robin for her shift and Billy for coffee before he went to the garage.

Jonathan also started hanging around a lot more since New Years and Nancy called every couple of days and for mandatory FaceTime sessions.

The kids were still practically living at the coffee shop and had set up camp in their living room. Max was over more often than she wasn’t. Robin started Quesadilla Fridays and had inserted herself into their weekly routine. Steve could see her and Billy growing closer, more than once he’d caught her bringing up something that Billy had texted her, Steve totally out of the loop.

Billy and Steve? Went on like normal.

They maybe kept getting closer, physically and otherwise, but nothing had changed. They were friends. Steve was trying hard to keep it that way.

——

It was mid-February when Steve asked Billy if he was planning on rejoining the basketball team.

He’d been wondering because Billy had started the running and the working out. But, Billy just smirked around a _I’ll go one-on-one with you anytime, pretty boy._ Which, was _not_ something Steve needed a mental image of right now, okay? He didn’t bring it up again.

The week of valentine’s day was dreary and rainy and _cold_. Him and Robin were working the counter, the kids were upstairs playing some new video game Mike had gotten, and Billy was at the garage.

Robin snapped a photo of Steve leaning against the counter on his elbow, propping his head up as he pouted about the shit weather. She sent it to Billy, because _of course she did_.

“Stop sending pictures of me with my ass in the air to Billy!”

“Why, it’s your best feature.” Robin responded while looking at her phone.

Steve turned fully toward her with a shocked expression. “How _dare_ you. My hair is my best feature, everyone knows that. My eyes are my second, mouth third, my _ass_ is _fourth_.”

“Oh, well excuse me.” Robin rolled her eyes, a little bit still ignoring him. “Sorry Billy and I don’t adhere to your self-ascribed list.”

Steve stood up straight. “Billy talks about my ass?”

Robin looked up from her phone and blinked, realizing she may have said something she hadn’t meant to say.

“This feels like maybe something I shouldn’t be a part of.”

Steve glared at her, annoyed that she was such a good friend. But he wanted to know, _needed_ to know. Maybe be could lure her into giving him _just_ a little.

“Does Billy remember that we made out?”

Robin’s eyes went wide, her mouth dropping in literal shock. “Excuse me, _what?_ ”

Oh, so Billy hadn’t told her then. Or he really hadn’t remembered. Either way – _whoops_.

“Um,” Steve let his hand run through his hair. “Yeah. Billy and I kind of got drunk on Christmas Eve and… made out.”

“Why the fuck are you just telling me this now!”

“Because! I just… the next morning was like nothing had changed and I felt _bad_ for like, taking advantage of him like that. So, I just, kind pretended like I didn’t remember either.”

“But you don’t know that he doesn’t remember!” Robin yelled. “He could very much remember but thinks you don’t because you didn’t _say_ anything! Ugh, you are so ridiculous, I’m going to have to fix this mess -”

“No.” Steve shook his head. “We’re not _fixing_ anything. Billy is straight. And, I’m his friend. Basically his only friend. I’m not going to take advantage of the fact that he come to me for comfort. I can’t do that to him, no matter how I feel.”

Robin just looked at him, light in her eyes and pity around the twist of her mouth. They stood in silence for a few moments, letting Steve’s words ring out between them.

“So… you’re not straight?”

Steve snorted. He should’ve expected Robin to grab onto that. He ran a hand through his hair again.

“No. Sorry I didn’t tell you.”

Robin shrugged easily. “To each their own journey, dingus.”

“It’s not because I didn’t trust you. Not at all.” He needed her to know that. “I just… don’t think I’ve ever told anyone. I just only ever dated girls, so, it wasn’t something I ever really felt the need to say out loud about myself.”

“Until Billy.” Robin nodded, allowing the pieces to fall together in her mind.

“Until Billy.” Steve nodded back with a sigh. “I think I’m in love with him.”

Robin snorted, “No shit.”

Steve pushed at her shoulder lightly. “Shut up.”

“Honestly, I should’ve known when we were working at Scoops. Hargrove didn’t like anyone, but he sure as shit liked you.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “He did not.”

“Uh, Steve, you literally are the only one who made it on the _Billy Thotgrove_ instagram. You can’t tell me he wasn’t a little obsessed with you even back then. And now? Forget about it.”

“Give it a rest, Buckley.”

“Steve. My darling dingus.” Robin laid her hands on his shoulders. “Billy Hargrove does not have friends. He doesn’t like anyone. Pre and Post Starcourt. And yet, from day one, what does he do? Wear your clothes. Hold your hand. Post pictures of you on the Instagram no one else is on.”

“You seem to be forgetting that we literally _fought_ and that he actually gave me a concussion. He has not liked me from day one.”

“I’m actually prepared to fight you on this, but instead I’ll just say that no straight is gonna get that up in your grill on the basketball court or call you _pretty boy_ while you’re naked in the showers.” Robin gave him a _look_ and Steve rolled his eyes. “But, I digress. Let’s just say from post the mall massacre. All the things I said are true. And! Straight dudes don’t make out with other dudes, drunk or not.”

“I think that’s not exactly true and that you may be playing into a heteronormative ideal –”

Robin cut him off with a groan. “While I’m really proud of you for saying that – you know what I mean! Billy obviously wanted to kiss you, who cares if he was drunk! Drunk doesn’t change your sexuality, Steven.”

“We don’t know what his sexuality is!” He yelled back. “I have to assume straight until told otherwise.”

Robin was looking at him with narrowed eyes, her jaw wired shut like she wanted to say something but wouldn’t. She just sighed.

“Fine. I’ll drop it. On one condition.”

“What?” Steve sighed.

“We’re doing something for valentine’s day. No arguments.”

Steve groaned. “What’re we gonna do on a dumb holiday about love?”

“I don’t know – be in love as friends? Do something fun and platonic but also festive?”

Steve just dead stared her, “You wanna watch a bunch of romantic comedies and get wine drunk, don’t you.”

“Yeah. And I want Billy to cook me dinner because I’ve been literally dreaming about his homemade pizza since the last time he made it.”

“I’m not getting out of this, am I?”

——

Steve, in fact, did not get out of it.

Valentine’s day was on a Saturday, which would’ve been really nice if Steve had a date or something. But, instead, he was in his living room, drinking pink wine, watching their _fourth_ romantic comedy of the night and Billy wasn’t even done with dinner yet.

Steve wasn’t exactly sure what he’d expected of Billy when he told him about Robin’s plans. But, the casual shrug and _sounds fun_ certainly hadn’t been it.

Steve had his glasses on, and one of Billy’s hoodies. He hadn’t bothered to change out of his basketball shorts, it was just Robin, and Billy saw him dressed like this every day.

Billy was dressed similarly, in joggers and a hoodie, his hair thrown up into a messy bun that Steve _adored_.

Robin was the only one that looked like she planned to be outside and that was really only because she didn’t live here. But she looked comfy in her oversized trousers and sweater.

Chocolate and wine littered the coffee table, _Dirty Dancing_ playing on the tv.

“Ugh, what I would give to Swayze Baby just once.” Robin moaned out. Steve snorted.

“I’m sure it’s not that hard.”

Robin looked at him, then his arms, and Steve felt a little appalled that her gaze was implying things.

“I’m sure Billy could probably Swayze someone, that’s what I’m sure of.” She sipped her wine.

Okay, and _yeah_ , that was a nice image – Billy’s muscles straining as he lifted someone over his head by their hips. A real nice image. But totally not something he needed to be thinking about, _Robin_.

“You’re both fucking ridiculous.” Was Billy’s only reply as he set the pizza down on the breakfast bar.

Robin was up and over to the pizza before Steve could even blink. Steve got up to follow her before she ate it all. He went around the counter to stand beside Billy, leaning in close enough to feel his body heat, but not enough that they were actually touching. Steve wanted to touch Billy so badly, it was getting harder and harder not to just walk up and curl into his chest.

Steve leaned forward against the counter so he wouldn’t do just that, pulling apart the slices Billy had cut.

“My boyfriends made me dinner, guys.” Steve looked up at Robin’s phone and smirked. “Happy V-day from us Single Ladies.” Steve flipped the finger at her and Billy snorted.

They ate Billy’s homemade pizza, they drank the pink wine, they watched silly movies and ate too much chocolate.

Steve felt good. Not drunk, just _loose_. He was comfortable in the middle of the couch, Robin playing with his hair, Billy a long line of heat pressed up beside him.

“Ugh, I miss kissing.” Robin groaned as they watched Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams go at it.

“Yeah.” Steve sighed, because he could _definitely_ relate.

“Kissing is Steve’s favorite.” Robin announced to the room. “He’s like, obsessed with making out.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “I am not.”

“Yes, you are. You literally told me so like, the last time you were high.” She smirked at them. “You said, and I quote, that you _missed it almost more than sex_ and then you decided that was ridiculous and told me that you were horny like _all the time_ and that it was annoying because it’s hard trying to coverup your big dick – _heh_ , hard, get it? And like, I didn’t need to know that about you? Also, _gross_ , because lesbian.”

“ _Oh my god_ , Robin, shut up.” Steve looked at her with wild eyes and flush spreading down his neck.

Robin ignored him and instead looked to Billy with a smirk in her eyes. “What about you, Billy? What do you miss?”

Billy shook his head, the tips of his ears red. “Don’t drag me into your shenanigans.”

Robin narrowed her gaze at him and Billy glared back at her. Steve couldn’t help but feel like they were having a conversation that he wasn’t apart of. It made his stomach hurt a little that his two best friends had a secret without him – it’s how he felt often with Nance and Jonathan last year, except worse because now he was like, in love with Billy.

“Can you two like, stop making eyes at each other. It’s bumming me out.” Steve pouted, eyes on the tv.

Billy’s arm immediately draped over his shoulders, tugging him even more against Billy’s side. “Aw, don’t worry, Stevie.” Billy cooed, hand around his shoulder sliding up into his hair. “No need to be jealous, you know I only got eyes for you.”

Robin snorted into her wine glass and Steve felt himself flush.

“You literally sound _exactly_ like the ghost of Hargrove past.” Robin smiled cheekily, proud of her own joke. “It’s kinda freaky.”

Billy gave a half-assed, “Shut up.” in reply.

Steve and Billy were essentially cuddling. Steve’s shoulders were shifted against Billy’s armpit and chest, one leg on the ground, the other thrown over Robin’s lap, Billy’s hand in his hair. It was nice, more than nice if he was being honest. He wanted to curl up in Billy’s lap and fall asleep burrowed into his neck.

But, they were friends and friends didn’t do that.

So, Steve suffered in silence. At least he was comfortable.

He must’ve fallen asleep at some point – because that was just something he did now, fall asleep on Billy Hargrove. He blinked awake slowly, deeply comfortable and not really planning on moving. Billy and Robin were playing some game on her phone, way more of the wine gone.

He was more than comfortable, eyes sort of open and their voices a gentle hum around him. It was nice; a pleasantness he hadn’t felt really… ever. He felt safe here with them in a way that he always noticed the absence of in his life.

Steve’s phone started ringing, a FaceTime from Nancy breaking his thoughts. He was still a little snoozy and didn’t really think before answering it. “Oh, hello.” He smiled with tired eyes.

“Steve.” Nancy sighed out with a smile. It had a dreamy quality to it, like the heroine in a grand romance. Nancy could be a real tough bitch when she wanted to be, but there was something just so tender at her core. It made Steve’s heart thump a little a-rhythmically, even still after all this time. “Who are you laying on?”

Steve angled the phone up so Nancy could see Billy’s face. “Billy.” Steve smiled.

Billy gave a little wave as Nancy called, “Hi Billy!”

“Nancy!” Robin yelled. “The true love of my life!”

Nancy threw her head back and laughed, Steve turned the phone around so they could see each other. “Robin, I miss your face.”

“Ugh, come home to us, Nancypants!” Robin grabbed Steve’s phone and brought it close to her face. “We miss you! And look who I’m stuck with.”

Robin pressed the button to turn the camera and he heard Nancy catcall-whistle. Steve must look insane, with Billy’s hand in his wild ass hair and glasses a little askew, practically curled up with Billy Hargrove of all people. Steve just send her middle fingers with a dead face.

“I mean, at least they’re handsome?” Nancy chuckled. “You could do worse, I’m sure.”

Robin sighed dramatically, like the drama nerd she was. “Alas, someone must take one for the team.”

“You’re so full of it.” Steve hefted himself from his spot on Billy and grabbed his phone back. “The abuse I put up with when you’re not here, Nance. Seriously.”

Nancy smiled, but he could see the sadness lining the edges of her eyes. And suddenly, he wasn’t smiling anymore.

“You good?”

Nancy shrugged and Steve could immediately tell by the tightness of her lips that she was going to cry. He pushed himself off the couch, stepping over Billy and walking toward his bedroom.

“What’s wrong?”

He closed his bedroom door.

Nancy sighed and looked away. “I just… miss Jonathan.”

Steve nodded, “I know.”

This… should be weirder. They hadn’t been friends before they dated, and their breakup had been _exactly_ what you’d call dramatic. She’d had feelings for Jonathan while they were together, fallen out of love with him, and then broke up with him during a crisis. There had been so much going on around that – with Will and the Upside Down. And Steve had been mad about it for a while and it had hurt to see them together.

But, they had apologized, and they were his friends. They had a _bond_ or whatever. Eventually, it just got easier to sit with them at lunch, to hangout while the kids played _D &D_. Now, he couldn’t imagine his life without them.

So, should it be weird for Steve comfort his ex-girlfriend about missing a he guy she dumped him for? Probably. Was he still going to comfort her? Absolutely.

“Did I make a mistake? Coming here?”

“No, not at all.” Steve soothed. “Nancy, you belong in New York. So does Jonathan. He’ll get there eventually.”

“I just _left_ him, Steve.” A tear trailed down her cheeky and she brushed it away harshly, like she was mad at herself for crying. “We had a plan and the moment he veered away from it I… I just went without him.”

“Listen, Jon made his decision. And that was what _he_ needed to do. But, you did what _you_ had to do. There’s nothing wrong with that. He’s not mad at you, no one is.”

“I miss you so much.” Nancy cried a little harder, wiping at her face.

“I know, Nance. I miss you too.”

“Yeah, but you have Robin and Jon and the kids.” She looked at him meaningfully. “You have Billy.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “That doesn’t mean anything. I have Billy the same way I have all of you.”

Nancy shook her head. “That’s not what everyone’s been saying.”

“Who’s been saying what?” Steve demanded.

“It’s okay to like him, Steve. He’s not the same asshole that beat you up. We all know that.”

“I don’t know what Mike’s been telling you –”

“ _Jonathan_ said that Billy’s changed.” Nancy emphasized. “Will too. And, Jon said that you’ve been looking at him the same way you use to look at me.” Nancy tilted her head in that way that let her gaze bore into his, even over the phone. “I’m gonna have to believe him on that one.”

Steve felt his neck flush. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Nancy laughed and gave a watery smile, “Uh, pretty sure you do. You have all the pictures Jonathan took of us to prove it.”

“This is slander, is what it is.”

“You could tell me, you know.” Nancy said quietly, but so sincerely. “I wouldn’t be weird about it. I love you, Steve. You know that.”

And there it was. _I love you, Steve_. His heart used to break a little when she said that, every time. Not this time. He didn’t feel anything as she said it. Huh.

He nodded back. “I do. I know that, Nance. There’s just… nothing really to tell yet.”

“Okay.” She said, moving on. “Sorry for calling you to basically cry.”

Steve snorted. “What else am I here for? Everyone calls me to cry.”

Nancy smiled, “Check in on Jon for me?”

“Sure.” He nodded. “I’ll talk to you in a couple days.”

“Bye, Steve.”

“Later, Nance.”

He hung up and opened a text from Robin – _Billy’s pouting because you left him to talk to your ex. Come back before his pouting turns into rage._

Steve moved back into the living room and saw Robin aggressively rolling her eyes at Billy, who was sitting with his arms crossed tightly over his chest.

“Sorry,” He said as he flung himself back into his seat between them. “She just needed to cry about Jonathan for a minute.”

“Shouldn’t that be weird?” Robin asked, ripping open a Hershey’s kiss and popping it into her mouth.

Steve shrugged. “Probably. But, what am I gonna do about it now?”

“Uh, maybe don’t run off every time your ex calls?” Billy said with an attitude, eyes fixed on _The Notebook_ , arms still crossed.

Huh, Robin wasn’t kidding. He really was pouting.

Steve just bullied his way back into Billy’s space, pressing up along his side and tugging at his crossed arm. “Play with my hair again?”

“You’re like a fucking cat.”

“Please?” Steve turned up the doe eyes and the pouty lip, practically laying his head on Billy’s shoulder.

Billy looked down at him, eyes running over Steve’s face, lingering on his mouth. Steve tried not to let his stomach _swoop_ at that, tried to keep himself from chubbing up in his shorts. It was easy to remember the way Billy had kissed him, how he’d felt on top of him, especially when he was looking at Steve like _that_.

He needed to stop that line of thought _immediately_ before his clingy shorts showed exactly what he’d been thinking and embarrassed him in front of his friends. He pulled back with a dramatic sigh and exaggerated pout.

“I guess I’ll ask Robin, then.”

He’d barely moved toward her before Billy was pulling Steve to him and arranging him how he wanted. Steve sighed pleasantly as Billy’s fingers sunk into his hair and his body pressed up against Billy’s.

Robin said nothing, but Steve knew she was staring at them, reading into the situation. Steve pushed the thought away, not wanting to feel himself fall into that nervous, over-thinking place. He was comfortable and happy and if Robin wanted to talk to him about it tomorrow, fine, whatever.

They stayed like that for most of the night, watching movies and drinking. Billy wasn’t really letting Steve out of his space – _clingy_ in a way he hadn’t been since Christmas Eve. Steve was more than happy to have Billy’s hands on him, and the more they drank, the more handsy Billy got.

At one point, Steve got up to grab more wine and Billy tugged him down the same way he had on Thanksgiving. Though, instead of landing sprawled in Billy’s lap, he’d pulled Steve down on the couch so his head was on Robin’s thighs and Billy laid himself between Steve’s legs and _cuddled_ up on his chest.

Billy was literally laying on top of Steve with his head on Steve’s chest and acting like that was normal? He was pressed all along Steve’s front, his belly pushing into the cradle of Steve’s hips and his basketball shorts were about to do _nothing_ to hide his erection.

He blinked up at Robin, who was just staring down at them with her eyebrows raised as she took a sip of her wine.

Billy was quiet as he cuddled up on Steve, a flush high on his cheeks. Billy’s tolerance was really for shit these days.

Steve just wrapped his arms around Billy’s shoulders, holding him, toying with the loose curls that had escaped his bun. Billy hummed quietly, his eyes closed. He fell asleep after a little while, his breathing deepening, long dark lashes fanning over his warm cheeks.

Steve looked back up at Robin. “What do I do?” He whispered to her.

Robin just shrugged wildly, drunk herself. “Don’t get a boner? I don’t fucking know.” She whispered back.

“You are useless, you know that _._ ”

She rolled her eyes, “Oh my god, just cuddle him and enjoy it. Maybe when you both wake up, you can jack each other off and confess your undying love for another again.” She ignored Steve’s flush as she got up from the couch. “I’m gonna go pass out in your room.”

Billy was a warm line down his body. He couldn’t really stop the hard on, unfortunately. He was in love with Billy and the guy was a familiar weight on top of him. The last time they’d been in this position, Steve had come in his pants embarrassingly fast.

He sighed as Robin turned off the living room light, the soft glow from the tv the only thing keeping the room from total darkness. Well, it wasn’t the worst way to pass out. Hopefully Billy wouldn’t be like, _weird_ or _mad_ when he woke up to Steve’s dick pressed against him.

——

Billy was, in fact, _not_ weird or mad when Steve woke up.

It wasn’t morning – the room still dark, darker than before since the tv went to sleep. And Steve wasn’t actually convinced that he was awake at all?

Because Billy’s lips were at his neck, kissing gently along the line of his throat, his hips pressed against Steve’s and pushing the _slightest_ bit of pressure against Steve’s aching cock.

He let out a little _gasp_ at the feeling, his hips hitching up into Billy’s without much thought.

“Billy –” He muttered softly.

“Please.” Billy whispered against his throat, hips pressing harder into Steve’s and he could feel the outline of Billy’s dick beside his own. “ _Please_ , Stevie. Please let me. We don’t have to talk about it, I just – I _need_ –” Billy let out a little whine as he ground down into Steve again, panting.

“Hey.” Steve brought his hands up to caress Billy’s face, to hold him up from Steve’s neck. He couldn’t see much in the dark, but Billy was practically panting and his cheeks were warm with a flush. “Are you still drunk?” Billy pulled away from him at that, like Steve had burned him. But Steve followed, leaning up a bit with him, hands back on Billy’s neck and jaw. “Wait, talk to me. What do you need?”

He could see Billy looking him over, searching Steve’s eyes and face, pulling away embarrassed, trying to get up off the couch. He was running away.

Steve watched him go. Watched him duck into his room and close the door. Close it all the way – which, Billy never did.

Steve sighed, running a hand through his hair and leaned back against the couch. He’s still sleepy, but wired now from how Billy had woken him up and run out of the room.

“Fuck.” He muttered to himself.

His phone lit up on the coffee table, Steve grabbed it. It was a text from Billy.

_I think I’m still drunk_

Steve felt his stomach sink a little at those words. _Okay_. He typed back. The ellipses appeared and reappeared a few times before Billy texted again.

_I’m sorry, Steve. I get if you’re uncomfortable. It’s just… I’m still not great with touch, but I’m good with you and that just gets… mixed up sometimes._

Steve sighed. He got it, he really did. He was Billy’s friend, his roommate, his confidant. He was the only person who Billy really touched regularly outside of his sister. The last thing he wanted was to make Billy feel bad about getting his wires crossed, not after everything he’d been through.

Though his heart sank because of it.

_I get it_. He texted back. _Why don’t we talk about it tomorrow?_

It took a while for Billy to response, stoping and starting more than once. Until he finally just never replied.

Steve sighed deeply and texted Robin, asleep in his room, that something not good had happened between them and asked if she could leave when she woke up so him and Billy could talk it out. After that, he rolled so he was facing the back of the couch and went to sleep.

——

The next morning, Steve woke up to the sound of the front door clicking closed. He sat up, ran a hand through his messy hair, and saw he had a text from Robin. _Let me know how everything goes. It’ll be alright, Steve_.

He hauled himself up to piss and brush the sour taste from his mouth. Billy’s door was still closed and he sighed.

He was sitting at the breakfast bar, spooning the remains of his cereal miserably, when Billy walked into the kitchen.

His shoulders were already tense, his eyes straight forward and ignoring Steve where he sat.

“Can we talk?” Steve asked from his spot at the breakfast bar.

Billy’s back went rigid from where he was looking into the fridge. He sighed, closed the door and turned around, leaning against the refrigerator and crossed his arms tightly over his chest. Defensive. Eyes closed off and a little cold. So vastly different from the loose posture and honeyed gaze Steve had gotten used to.

“Look,” He started a bit aggressively. “I’m sorry, alright? I’m sorry for last night, sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

Steve sighed, “Billy, look, I’m not mad.” He said honestly, staring into Billy’s eyes. “I get it. I really do. Literally nothing about last night made me uncomfortable.”

He watched Billy’s shoulders deflate a little. “Why didn’t you say that, then.”

“Because I didn’t want to have this conversation drunk? Over text? And you actually ran away from me last night?”

“Yeah, well.” He ran a hand through his messy hair.

Steve looked at Billy. Saw the embarrassment lining his features. The tightness around his mouth and eyes. He felt the words on the tip of his tongue, _aching_ to slid past his throat. _I love you_. _I want you_. _Please, I’m yours_.

“I’m gonna go smoke.” Billy muttered, tying his hair up with a practiced ease, as he moved from the kitchen to the little balcony off the living room.

Steve watched him go, feeling the words get heavier and heavier on his tongue. Billy still seemed embarrassed about last night, even though Steve assured him that he understood. Steve just watched him open the thin french doors to the small balcony, pulling out the cigarettes and lighter he kept out there. Billy didn’t smoke much anymore, mostly because he’d been in a hospital for three months and then recovering from a chest wound. But, once in a while now, he’d wander out and have a cigarette or two.

Steve moved to his bedroom, quietly closing the door and calling Robin.

“Hey!” She answered. “What the fuck is going on?”

Steve sighed, running a hand through his limp hair. “Sorry about kicking you out.”

“It’s fine, just, what happened?”

So Steve told her. About how Billy woke him up in the middle of the night, the things he’d said, what he’d texted, how he acted this morning.

“Jesus.” She murmured. “You two are fucking morons.”

Steve just sighed. “I don’t know what to do, Robin. I want to tell him, I feel like I _need_ to tell him. But the other part of me is literally screaming _danger_ , so I just, don’t know.”

“I think you should tell him.” Robin said.

“Yeah?” Steve deflated a little. “But what if its full on worst case scenario? What if I tell him and he punches me, or asked me to leave? What if he doesn’t want to be my friend anymore?” He tugged on his hair. “I can’t tell him.”

“Steve.” Robin said sternly, pulling his attention from downward spiraling. “Please listen to me. I am _telling_ you, none of those things will happen. I know they won’t. Please tell him.”

Steve let out a deep sigh.

“You can’t keep going on like this.”

“I know.” Steve chewed on the inside of his cheek as he thought. “Alright, I’m gonna tell him.”

“Thank god.” Robin groaned. “Call me if you need me.”

Steve hung up, and gave himself a minute to freak out, before leaving his room to find Billy. He was still smoking on the little balcony, leaning on it and looking out over the back.

“Billy.”

He turned, leaning his lower back against the railing, snubbing out the cigarette and looking at Steve. Neither of them said anything for a moment, both of them just sort of staring around each other. Billy finally crossed his arms over his chest.

“What’s up, Steve?”

Steve just looked at him, framed by the bright midday light, hair catching in it, gleaming almost. He looked exhausted and a little wrung out. He looked just as beautiful as he always did.

But, his eyes were getting harder and his mouth twisting as his jaw clenched. Every moment the silence went on, Billy retreated more and more. He was still embarrassed, he still thought Steve was mad at him. Steve was worried about the same thing.

“Fucking out with it. I can’t just sit here with you staring at me, I’m gonna come outta my skin.” He crossed his arms tight over his chest. “You said you weren’t mad. I get it, if you are. But can you just _say_ it so we can move on.”

Steve shook his head, “I already told you that I’m not mad.”

“Then what the fuck is it?” Billy spread his arms out with the words, voice climbing as he went on. “You’re just standing here, _staring_ at me, looking like you’re about to break up with me. Just fucking _say_ it, whatever it is. I can handle it, Steve. I’m not fucking fragile.”

“I have fucking _feelings_ for you, alright?” Steve yelled back, eyes a little wild. “So I can’t do shit like that with you and have it not mean something. _Okay_?”

Billy blinked, the anger deflating. “You – “

“Yeah.” Steve breathed out shakily. “I’m sorry if that makes _you_ uncomfortable. And like, I totally get if you need me to like, fuck off for a few days or something.”

“You – _like_ me?”

Steve looked up and Billy’s arms weren’t across his chest anymore, they were loose at his sides, shock sort of scattered across his features.

“Yeah.” He breathed out again. “For kind of an embarrassingly long time, if I’m being honest.” He tore his gaze away from Billy’s. “You don’t have to like, _say_ anything or whatever. You’re my friend, I have every intention of keeping you that way. I promise not to make it weird or anything.”

Billy was quiet for a while, staring at Steve as he looked at anything but Billy. Eventually he said quietly – “What if I don’t want to be your friend?”

Steve’s head shot up, his eyes sort of stinging. Fuck, this is _exactly_ what he’d been afraid of, what Robin said _wouldn’t_ happen. He felt like he couldn’t _breathe_.

Billy pushed forward from the railing in an instant, grabbing Steve’s hand. “I didn’t mean it like that.” He muttered. “I – I meant,” He sighed, bit at the inside of his cheek, stared into Steve’s eyes. “I _meant_ , what if I liked you too?”

“Huh?” Steve went all dopey and doe-eyed and Billy snorted, lips curving into that fond little smile he only sent Steve.

Billy’s other hand came up, cradling Steve’s jaw so gently. “You heard me, Bambi.”

“You – I –” Steve’a eyes darted between the _blue blue blue_ of Billy’s. “I thought you were straight?”

Billy snorted loudly, pressing in closer to Steve. “Join the fucking club – you gave practically zero indication that you might lean in any other direction.” The thumb on his jaw moved slowly to his lips, Billy’s voice dropped as he moved so they were flush against each other. “I don’t know how you coulda thought I was straight. Fuck, pretty boy – how many times I gotta kiss you till you get the message.”

Steve’s heart was pounding off rhythm so hard it _hurt_. “Maybe one more.”

Billy smiled slowly and shook his head as he leaned in to capture Steve’s lips with his own.

The hand still holding his jaw angled him how Billy wanted, the hand on his wrist moved to his hip. Steve’s hands came up to bury themselves in Billy’s hair, pulling him in and kissing him _deep_ and _slow_.

Steve backed him up a little so Billy’s back rested against the door jam, his hands slipping to hold Billy’s face. The hand on his jaw slid to his shoulder, then to the back of his neck.

He licked deep into Billy’s mouth, pulling a moan from Billy’s throat. Steve’s hips jerked at the sound, nestling a little firmer into Billy’s. Another moan rang out between them and Billy’s hands trailed down his back, smoothing over the thin t-shirt until he reached Steve’s hips and gripped them tightly. Billy spread his legs as he leaned back against the door jam, pulling Steve even tighter into the cradle of his hips.

Steve pushed forward sinking into Billy’s warmth as he licked into his mouth. Billy bit at his lower lip, scraping his teeth over it gently. Steve’s hips spasmed as he _whined_ into Billy’s mouth.

His cock was _throbbing_ , hard and leaking as he slowly rutted into Billy’s hips. He could feel Billy just as hard against him and Steve wanted nothing more than to get his hands on it.

Billy seemed to have a similar idea, he pushed off from the door and began walking Steve back toward the bedrooms. Steve pulled his lips away, breathing harshly as he kissed over Billy’s sharp jaw and down his throat. The skin was _burning_ , Billy’s breath coming out in pants.

“There’s a perfectly good couch right there.” He murmured in Billy’s ear, nipping at the lobe.

Billy grunted a little, still wrapped up in Steve as he walked him his bedroom. “I’m fucking sick of that couch.”

Steve snorted against Billy’s skin, letting Billy lay him out on his bed. He hadn’t been in Billy’s room since he was helping Max set it up. Billy hadn’t said he couldn’t, hadn’t kept him out, but Steve wanted Billy’s room to be a safe space, hadn’t wanted to intrude.

Billy looked at him laid out over the messy sheets of his bed, eyes soft but blown out with heat and arousal. His hand came up to cup Steve’s jaw, thumb running over his swollen lips again. “Fuck, you’re pretty.”

Steve rolled his eyes at Billy’s words, but couldn’t stop the small smile or the flush falling over him. “Shut up.”

Billy smirked playfully, leaning down over him. “Why don’t you make me, pretty boy?”

Steve just shook his head with a smile as he grabbed at Billy, pulling him atop fully and bringing their lips together again. Billy went easily, crawling further over Steve’s body so he could lay between Steve’s splayed thighs and rut gently into Steve’s heavy cock.

A groan ripped out of Steve’s throat at the feeling, his head tossing back and Billy nipped and sucked at his pale throat. “ _Fuck_.”

Billy continued to grind down against Steve’s cock, pulling little choked off whines and heavy breaths from him. Billy sunk his teeth a little sharply into the tendons of Steve’s neck and Steve’s hips _spasmed_ , legs wrapping tightly around Billy’s hips of their own accord, pinning him there. Billy groaned roughly into Steve’s neck at the feeling, pushing his hips harshly into Steve’s, cock dragging in a way that had Steve’s toes _curling_.

“ _Billy_.” He whined, tugging at the hair falling out of Billy’s bun and pulling his face up to meet Steve’s. “If you keep doing that, I will come in my pants.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time.” Billy muttered in between kisses.

“Wait,” Steve said, pulling back. “You _remember_ that?”

Billy looked at him with a furrow between his brows. “Yeah? Do you?”

Steve closed his eyes and smiled to himself. “We’re _such_ idiots.”

Billy pouted a little, eyebrows angry. “ _You_ are not an idiot.” He kissed Steve as though that would prove his point.

Steve melted a little.

“I just meant, that I thought you didn’t remember either. I didn’t want to make it weird between us, so I just, didn’t say anything.”

Billy’s shoulders relaxed, “You were so out of it that night, I was sure you wouldn’t remember. I felt like I’d taken advantage,” Billy muttered, kissing gently over Steve’s cheek and jaw, almost like an apology. “Like what’d happened was a mistake. You didn’t seem like anything had changed in the morning, so I just… moved on.”

Steve pulled Billy’s face up to his and kissed him hard. When he pulled away, he looked into Billy’s dazed eyes. “Honestly, I felt the same. If I had known…”

He moved to Billy’s neck, kissing and nipping down all the way down, slipping his hands under Billy’s shirt to grip at his back.

“Wait –” He said, panting heavily. “Is this okay?”

Billy looked down a him, confusion bleeding into the arousal shading his features. “What?”

“ _This_.” Steve slid his hands up Billy’s bare back, hips shifting a little causing both of them to groan.

“Why wouldn’t it be okay?”

“Because,” Steve sighed as Billy’s lips returned to his skin. “Because you don’t like to be touched.”

“Yeah, but I like _your_ touch.” He said like that was more than obvious.

“I just don’t want to do anything to make you uncomfortable. You have to tell me if you’re not okay with something.”

Billy snorted into his neck, where he’d stretched the collar of Steve’s t-shirt to lick over his collarbone. “Not a lot I wouldn’t be okay with when it comes to you, pretty boy.”

“I mean it, Billy.” He said, looking down to catch Billy’s eyes.

“Alright, Steve. I promise to let you know.”

“Good.” Steve sighed out, telegraphing each movement before he made them, and flipped them gently. “Now, how do you want me to make you come?”

Billy _groaned_ , reaching down to grip harshly at his dick, deliciously outlined in his joggers. “ _Fuck_ , Steve, you can’t just say shit like that.”

“Why not?” He playfully pouted, rounding out his eyes and plumping his lips in a way he knew Billy would like.

Billy groaned again, still gripping his cock through his pants. “Because, _asshole_ , I’ve been thinking about this since I got to this shithole town. You, like _this,_ it’s like a wet dream.”

“Oh,” Steve couldn’t help but smirk, his heart pounding at Billy’s words. “I’ve had plenty of those about you.”

Billy tossed his head back and groaned. Steve leaned forward, laying one light kiss against the arch of Billy’s throat and whispered, “What do you want, Billy?”

“Fuck,” He looked up as Steve pulled back, sitting on Billy’s thighs. “I wanna see you.”

Steve reached forward and pulled his basketball shorts down as far as they’d go. His cock sprung forward, curving up with how desperately _hard_ he was. He felt precome pearl at the tip, wetting the head as it dripped.

Steve watched as Billy’s dick _kicked_ within his hold, felt another drop of precome pearl at the way Billy practically _whined_ , eyes solely on Steve’s aching cock.

“Jesus _fuck_ , Steve.” He watched with clouded eyes as Steve brought a hand up to grip the base. “I wanna touch you.”

“ _Please_.” Steve breathed out.

Billy shoved his joggers down, getting his dick out. It was _thick_ , wide and heavy. _Fat_. Steve’s hands twitched in the effort not just grab at it. Billy sat up, pulling Steve to him, and wrapped a big hand around Steve’s cock.

Steve sighed, head dropping back, eyes closed tightly, as Billy pumped his length. He felt hot, tingly and ready to burst out of his skin, and Billy had done little more than put a hand on him. It should be embarrassing, but Steve was past caring.

He felt like Nancy, weirdly enough. He could see her perfectly in his memory, riding him in the same position he was in now – head thrown back, tits out, hips moving in those _tight_ little circles that had made her thighs shake. Fuck, he wanted to ride Billy like that.

Billy was fisting him slowly with one hand and was pushing up his shirt with the other. Steve got the memo pretty quickly after Billy growled, causing his dick to jerk at the noise. He pulled off the shirt, tossing it somewhere behind him and moved forward to grab at Billy’s weeping cock.

The noise Billy made when Steve touched him was… well, Steve _literally_ almost came. His balls drew up and his stomach jolted, cock drooling. It was _not_ something he’d ever expected to hear from Billy Hargrove and Steve wanted to hear it again.

Billy pushed his face into Steve’s throat, breathing harshly, making punched-out little noises as Steve gripped him firmly and stroked with _intent_.

The hand on Steve’s cock was basically just a firm hold, Billy offline as Steve worked him. It was alright, Steve wanted this just as bad. He changed his grip and twisted his wrist at the head, _squeezing_ , Billy groaning at his throat.

After a particularly good jerk, Billy’s hand tightened around Steve’s cock and he couldn’t help the deep moan it pulled out of him. “ _Billy_.”

Billy’s cock jumped, his stomach muscles tightening, and came all over Steve’s hand. Shooting up his chest, even hitting Steve’s chin. He was panting harshly, eyes half closed.

Steve’s cock kicked in Billy’s grip and that seemed to push him into action. He pushed Steve onto his back, quickly but gently, leaning over him to lick at his chest, hand moving furiously over Steve’s weeping cock.

Steve’s back just arched, his head thrown back, breaths barely passing his lips. He was whining, which was embarrassing, but Billy seemed more than turned on by it, so whatever. Billy’s grip was firm and perfect, squeezing the head and thumbing the underside and alternating between jacking him so fast it must hurt his arm and so slow Steve thought he’d _die_.

“Please,” He just kept muttering as Billy sucked bruises into his skin, licking up his own come from Steve’s chest. “ _Please_ , Billy.”

“You close, Stevie.”

“ _So close_.” He whined.

Billy licked at Steve’s collarbone and bit down this side of _just_ too hard and Steve was done. He shot between them, coming on his own stomach and Billy’s shirt, breathing so heavily he thought he may pass out.

Steve just laid there, trying to catch his breath from a fucking _hand job_ , while Billy kissed gently up his throat.

“Holy shit.” He breathed out, hand coming up to rake through his own hair.

“Hmm.” Billy hummed into his skin.

They laid like that for a few moments, sticky and sweaty and disgusting. Steve catching his breath, Billy kissing every inch of Steve’s chest.

“You mean to tell me, we coulda been doing that since you rolled into Hawkins?”

Billy chuckled against his skin. “Probably not. My old man wasn’t real keen on me having a thing for pretty boys.”

Steve brought his hand up to tuck some loose honeyed curls behind Billy’s ear. “That’s shitty. I’m sorry.” He said gently. “That why you guys moved here?”

It occurred to him that he’d never asked.

“Not really.” Billy said. “I’m sure it didn’t hurt. The real reason was Max’s dad. Hard to play house when you got a junkie hanging around. So, Neil asked for a transfer and the company sent him here.”

“I know everything’s mostly kind of sucked since you’ve been there, but I honestly couldn’t imagine being here without you.” Steve leaned in to press a soft kiss to Billy’s lips.

“Me too, Stevie.” He uttered. “Coulda done without the _dying_ , but I’m glad I met you.” And Steve could see the sincerity in his eyes. “You’re my best friend, you know that, right?”

“Yeah,” Steve smiled. “I know.”

——

They laid like that for a while more before Billy hauled Steve up and shoved him in the direction of the bathroom.

After their showers, Steve ordered pizza and they sat on the couch and ate it while resuming whatever show they were currently trying to get through. Billy would hold his hand, or lean over to kiss him, almost testing to see if he could.

Steve practically draped himself across Billy as soon as they were done eating, so that put an end to that.

Robin texted him sometime before bed to see if he was alright and Billy was sucking an impressive hickey onto his neck so Steve just replied with, _Fine_.

It was late, Billy had school in the morning, so they went to bed like responsible adults. But not before making out against every wall between the couch and Steve’s bedroom. And then against his door. And finally on Steve’s bed.

“It’s late.” Billy mumbled against Steve’s lips. “I should go to bed.”

“Mmhmm.” Steve nodded, licking into Billy’s mouth.

Billy groaned and pushed Steve into the bed a little harder. “I might pass out on you.”

“Okay.” Steve said, wrapping his arms tightly around Billy. “That’s fine.”

Billy snorted and kissed over the bruises lining Steve’s throat and chest. That was gonna be real fun trying to cover up tomorrow. Steve thumbed a good one he’d given Billy in retaliation. “You’re ridiculous, you know that?”

Steve just shrugged, “First thing you need to know about dating me – I’m a really clingy boyfriend. So, sorry in advance.”

“Oh, we’re dating now?” Billy asked playfully with a smirk.

“Yeah.” Steve said sweetly, pressing a kiss to his lips. “We are.”

Billy smiled softly. A fond little thing that tore Steve up inside. “Okay.”

Steve kissed him gently again, “Go to bed.”

Billy pulled himself out of Steve’s arms and pushed himself off the bed, running a hand through his still damp hair. “Ugh, I do not want to go to school tomorrow.”

“Blow it off.” Steve shrugged.

Billy rolled his eyes. “I missed like, the first half of the year, I’m not skipping. I’m gonna go, I’m just gonna complain about it.”

“Okay.” Steve chuckled. “Wake me up before you leave.”

Billy leaned down for one more kiss. “Will do, pretty boy.”

Steve slept well that night, slept hard. Woke up to Billy pressing soft kisses to his cheeks and eyes, murmuring quietly and stroking a hand through his hair. It was honestly the best way he’d ever been woken up.

He sent Billy off to school with a kiss and a promise of _later_ , falling back asleep once Billy was gone. He woke up sometime later to texts from Robin and Max, both asking why Billy had a big ass hickey he was trying to hide, but it already seemed like they both knew the answer – or what they wanted it to be. That must’ve been a fun car ride this morning.

He scrolled through Instagram and Twitter, realizing very quickly that Billy and his hickey were the only thing anyone at Hawkins High seemed to care about.

Everyone seemed to be speculating, beyond curious – especially because since his return he was so different from the Billy Hargrove of last year. Gone was the boisterous, snarling, keg king and in his stead was the quietly angry Billy who’d withdrawn into himself after surviving a nightmare.

It was made abundantly clear since his return to school that Billy didn’t want to be engaged. He didn’t want to touch, he didn’t want to talk, he just wanted to go to class and get out. Robin was a constant at school, the only one he allowed into his space. People were quick to insinuate that Robin was the owner of that hickey. Others shot that down instantly.

One or two of the girls he remembered having hooked up with at parties and liked to watch basketball practice threw his name into the mix.

_My money’s on Steve Harrington_ a reply to one of the original tweets had said. _Who remembers that tension on the court??_

And, she wasn’t wrong? But so far only like two or three people had mentioned him. Mostly people thought it was Robin, or like, someone’s _mom_ , or a factious mystery lover.

Eventually it was time for him to get ready for work. He missed not picking up the kids every day. Some days, when Billy’s shift at the garage was scheduled right after school, Steve would go. He saw the kids like literally every day regardless, but he still missed them sometimes.

He got dressed, trying to decide if it’d be better or worse to wear a turtle neck as he looked at the marks mottling his skin. Billy had really left a string of mouth shaped bruises all along his neck and chest. His collarbones looked _obscene_.

He shook his head as he looked at them and threw on the thin turtle neck anyway, hoping it wouldn’t draw too much attention, but it was either that or look like a total slut at work, so.

The door opened just as Steve finished putting his shoes on, Billy sighing dramatically as he entered. He threw his stuff down and walked right into Steve’s space, burrowing into his neck.

Steve just wrapped his arms around Billy’s shoulders, keeping him there. Billy sighed happily, arms going tight around Steve’s waist. “I wanna do that all the time.”

Steve ran a soothing hand up and down his back. “You can. That’s a privilege boyfriends receive.”

Billy snorted into Steve’s neck. “Good to know.”

“How was school?”

“You’re asking like you already know.” Billy mumbled into his skin.

Steve shrugged a little, “I may have read some things on Twitter. Saw some interesting stories on Snap.”

Billy groaned, pressing harder into Steve. “It was very annoying. Robin literally wouldn’t shut up about it all day. Max has just been aggressively texting me question marks since this morning.”

“Sorry.” Steve tugged gently on a curl. “But since I’m about to experience the same fate, I actually may not be that sorry.”

Billy snorted and pulled back, pressing a soft kiss to Steve’s lips. “Let’s see the damage.” He pulled down the collar of Steve’s turtleneck and Steve watched Billy’s eyes literally darken. “Yeah, I’m not sorry about that.”

Steve pushed him away playfully. “Asshole.” Steve smiled. “You’re totally getting off on this.”

Billy smiled sharply and Steve felt his stomach _swoop_. “Absolutely, pretty boy.”

Steve just rolled his eyes and grabbed his apron. “Are you coming down later?”

“Yeah, I just need a minute.”

Steve just leaned in and kissed him, leaving him to decompress as Steve made his way downstairs. He went in through the back, not wanting to immediately be accosted by the kids.

Tabby was at the counter, Robin making drinks, the kids at their usual table whispering dramatically to each other. He was attempting to decide what would be the easiest option when Tabby turned and saw him.

“Hey, Steve.”

Robin whipped around from where she was making a coffee and zeroed in on his sweater. “Come over here right now.”

Steve just sighed, waved at Tabby as he passed, and grabbed one of the coffees in Robin’s order that had yet to be made.

“Is there a hickey under that sweater?”

Steve just rolled his eyes as he moved to fill the order. “You seem to think there is.”

“Well seeing as how you confessed your love to him yesterday and then he shows up this morning with big ass hickey, it’s almost the only explanation.”

“Who knows, he could’ve left me last night and hooked up with someone.”

Robin aggressively rolled her eyes and shot him a look, “ _Yeah_ , okay. In no universe would I believe that to be true, at all, since you are literally the only person he let’s that close.”

Steve felt warm at her comment but tried to push away the smile. “I’m not the only person –”

“Max doesn’t count. And no one else touches him. Not the kids, not Hopper, not me or Jonathan. Just you, pal.” She placed the finished drinks at the end of the counter for Tabby to call out. “So, I’m gonna take the matching hickeys and the gooey eyes to mean that it went well?”

“Uh, yeah.” Steve smiled and Robin gagged.

“I fucking told you.”

“Did you know?” He asked. “That he liked me? Did he tell you?”

Robin shrugged a little as she leaned back against the counter. “He may or may not have.” She said vaguely. “I mean, I sorta just asked him about it around Christmas, to feel out the vibes. He didn’t tell me that you two had made out on Christmas Eve.”

Steve squinted at her. “I feel like there’s a lot you’re leaving out.”

Robin raised a brow and shrugged a shoulder casually. “I don’t spill secrets, dingus. I’m not gonna tell you his shit, just like I didn’t tell Billy that you’ve wanted him to sit on your cock for over a year.”

“ _Shut up_!” He pushed at her shoulder and looked around to see Dustin gagging and Will completely red faced and Max staring horrified, while Mike and Lucas just looked on in shocked.

He just sort of stared back at them with wide eyes, the kids looking just as horrified, while Robin laughed. Tabby looked confused from her spot at the register.

Max was the first to pull herself out of their stupor and rush over to the end counter where Steve and Robin were. “Are you kidding?” She asked with big eyes. “Are you and Billy together? Seriously?”

“Uh,” Steve looked between her and Robin, unsure what he should say, wondering if Billy wanted to tell her himself. “…yes?”

She stared him down with that stern gaze she was so fond of before leaning over the counter and pulling him into a quick hug. She pulled back, punched him in the arm, and then left in a flurry of red hair to run upstairs. The boys immediately took her place, clamoring up to the counter, yelling all at once.

“ _You’re_ the one who mauled Billy?”

“Wait, so are you guys like, _boyfriends_ now?”

“Does this officially mean Billy’s in the party now? I kinda already started making him a character sheet…”

“Do you really want Billy to sit on your –”

“Okay!” Steve cut them off, coming around the counter to shuffle the boys back to their table in the corner. Thankfully the café was empty or else this could’ve been wildly more embarrassing. “Sit, go on.”

They sat back in their seats, looking sheepishly up at him. Steve looked down at them with narrowed eyes, hands naturally finding his hips in the way that made him look like a disgruntled mom. “Look, you little shits, you can’t just go around screaming my business in public.”

“But, you and Billy?” Dustin asked.

Steve sighed, “Yes, Billy and I are together. That doesn’t mean you all get act insane.”

“We won’t.” Will nodded sincerely. He was the only one Steve trusted when he made a promise.

Steve nodded, “Alright. Good.”

He went back behind the counter, Robin shaking her head as she smirked. “Billy says good luck.”

“Huh?”

She gestured to her phone, showing Steve the photo she’d sent to Billy of Steve with his hands on his hips, the boys all looking up at him with wide eyes, and the response – _tell pretty boy good luck with that_.

Steve just pouted and Robin sent Billy a picture of that too.

——

Steve was finding that not a lot had changed.

The kids still hung around, Steve still worked, Billy still went to school and appointments, Max still sauntered in whenever she felt like it, Nancy still called, El still needed help with schoolwork.

It was normal. Nothing had changed.

Except, everything had changed. Because Billy was his boyfriend now.

More often than not, they were wrapped up around each other. Not so much in front of the kids, but they seemed pretty use to Billy crowding up next to Steve anyway, only throwing out a _yuck_ here or there when Billy and Steve got too close for their liking.

Hop had just looked at them when they were over to help El with school, sighed, and handed El five dollars. She preened, smiling brightly as she said, “I called it, so he owes me money.”

Jonathan also didn’t seem all that surprised when he came to hang out, which Steve knew from Nancy that he’d suspected something for some time. He just gave Steve a little smile and said, “Oh, so you’re not going to drape yourself all over me when you’re drunk anymore? Cool.” Steve had thrown a pillow at him, ignoring his laugh, and kissed Billy sweetly when be pouted at Jonathan’s words.

Billy was the most comfortable around Robin, Steve found. Which, wasn’t all that shocking considering they were friends and she apparently kept Billy’s secrets. He would let Steve hold his hand or cuddle up to him when the others were around. But, when it was just Robin, he didn’t care if Steve kissed him, or draped himself bodily across Billy, or joked about intimate things.

Steve asked Billy about it, about why he seemed more comfortable being a couple around Robin but not the others. Billy had just shrugged, “She’s gay. She gets it.”

“Are you?” He couldn’t help but ask. “Gay?”

Billy took a moment to answer, eyes trained on the tv in front of them. Steve felt like he’d asked the wrong question, wanted to go back and erase it. But, then Billy was shrugging and didn’t seem mad as he answered.

“I mean, I don’t hate having sex with girls. I just… always liked it with guys better.” He turned to look at Steve, those _blue blue blue_ eyes looking pointedly into his own. “I’ve never been in love with a girl before. I don’t know if that makes me gay or not.”

Steve was nodding along, his heart beating off rhythm at the implication of Billy’s words. “Yeah. I get that. I’m definitely Bi.”

Billy smirked as he leaned forward into Steve’s space. “But you’ve also definitely been in love with a girl.”

“Have been.” Steve pressed. “Past tense.”

The air was heavy with that they weren’t saying, with what was being implied, with what they both knew but didn’t say.

Billy leaned the rest of the way into Steve’s space, kissing him slowly. Steve felt himself fall into Billy, wrapped up around him like nothing else mattered.

“I’m not afraid, if that’s what you were thinking.” Billy muttered quietly between them, kissing lightly over Steve’s jaw and making him shiver. “It’s just hard to shake it off sometimes, the stuff with my dad. But I’m not afraid to be with you.”

Steve ran a hand through Billy’s hair, petting it back from his face. “You don’t have to. Shake it off, I mean. I can understand that it’s uncomfortable, that it might take some time.” He kissed Billy’s temple. “I’m not in any rush.”

Billy let out a harsh breath into Steve’s neck. “I trust you. It’s important to me that you know that.”

“I know.” Steve whispered.

“I just… it’s hard sometimes, with other people. Some of that’s from dealing with my old man for so long, some of that’s from the Shadow.” He paused and Steve shivered in a different way at the mention of the Mind Flayer. “… some of its from my mom leaving.”

Billy didn’t talk about his mom. Steve was positive he didn’t really know anything about her. El hadn’t divulged what she’d learned between Billy’s death and the call from Owens, but Steve remembered whispers from the mall – _she was really pretty_.

“My parents don’t like me either.” Steve whispered, wrapping his arms tighter around Billy’s shoulders. “I could never quite figure out how to be what they wanted. I came close, for a little while. Was _King Steve_. Threw parties and played sports and pretended like nothing mattered, like it didn’t bother me they were gone all the time. But, even at the height of that, I still wasn’t good enough. My grades were shit, my attitude disrespectful. Then all the shit with the kids went down and I just… stopped caring for real. My parents only noticed because I told them.”

Steve pulled Billy’s head up from his neck, looking down into his eyes, tucking curls behind his silly ears.

“The kids, Robin, Nance and Jonathan, Joyce, and Hopper. You. Those are the only people who’s opinions matter, who I care about. That’s my family.”

Billy’s eyes watered a little as he gazed at Steve.

“I think… I think they may be my family too.”

“Oh, they definitely are.” Steve nodded with a smile. “I’m pretty sure Joyce and Hop would adopt you, if you let them. And Will? You’re literally the only one he’s that relaxed around outside of Jonathan. Don’t even get me started on Max. I honestly believe she would kill for you. Like, _actual_ murder, Billy.”

Billy snorted and shook his head at Steve. “And what about you, pretty boy?”

Steve thought about it for a moment, his hands absentmindedly running over over Billy’s shoulders. “There’s not a lot I wouldn’t do for you, honestly.”

Billy ran a hand through Steve’s hair, looking seriously into his eyes. “Steve…” He uttered gently. “I couldn’t even begin to describe the lengths I would go to for you.”

And, maybe it was too soon to be talking like this. Maybe they hadn’t been together long enough to warrant this type of devotion. But Steve’s heart pounded off rhythm so hard in his chest at the words, he felt _warm_ and _seen_ in a way he never had before. Because, Nancy had loved him once, but not like this.

Steve has _never_ been loved like this. Not by anyone.

He pushed into Billy’s mouth, hands grabby, as he laid Billy back against the couch, reversing their positions. He cradled Billy’s face, kissed him tenderly, tried to show Billy what they hadn’t exactly said out loud yet.

Billy was rutting up into him – slow and syrupy, no rush. Taking what Steve was giving him and giving the same in return. Steve left Billy’s swollen lips and kissed down his cheek, over his jaw, beneath the bolt that always made Steve flush a little, to his throat.

“Steve,” Billy whispered breathily.

He pressed his hips down, rocking slowly into Billy. “What do you want, Billy?” Steve whispered against his throat.

They’d gotten into the habit of asking. Mostly because while Steve believed Billy when he said he didn’t mind Steve’s unexpected touch, Steve always wanted to make his intentions very clear anyway. The other reason, one he hadn’t quite known how to phrase to Billy, was that Steve had never been with a guy and he wasn’t always exactly sure how to vocalize what he wanted. Sometime it was just easier to have Billy tell him what to do.

“Fuck.” He moaned as Steve nipped at the smooth skin of his neck, the skin unblemished, the hickeys faded. “Just touch me.”

Steve pulled back just slightly, enough to pull Billy’s shirt off, enough to pull off his own. He kissed over Billy’s skin. Licking at his collarbones, lips dragging over the smooth silver scars over his chest. He let his tongue linger on a nipple, pulling a small gasp from Billy’s throat. He kissed down his stomach, over the fine blonde hairs beneath his navel, all the way to where he was obviously tenting his sweats. Steve paused for a moment, locking eyes with Billy from down his body, and letting his lips press over Billy’s cock through the fabric.

Billy groaned loudly, throwing his head back, a hand coming to grip tightly in Steve’s hair. He could feel Billy’s cock straining beneath the thin fabric, feel his hips shifting.

Steve lifted his head just enough to help Billy push down his sweats, heavy cock springing forward to lay against his stomach. Steve gripped it in his hand, pumping from root to tip once, twice, watching as Billy squirmed. He leaned down, brought it to his lips and let the fat head rest there for a moment.

Billy groaned so low in his throat that Steve was sure his neck was vibrating. Steve had never sucked a cock before, but he’d thought about blowing Billy enough times to know what he wanted to do.

Steve licked across the head and the breath in Billy’s chest seized, the hand in his hair tightening. Steve let the fat head push past his lips and linger on his tongue. Billy was close to hyperventilating and Steve had barely started.

He could taste precome in the back of his throat, bitter and sharp but not unpleasant. He gripped the base of Billy’s cock and slid his lips lower, just a bit, licking about the head. Billy’s chest was rapidly rising and falling, the muscles of his forearm straining, abs tensing to keep from bucking up into Steve’s mouth.

Steve ground his own hips into the couch, the sight of Billy fighting to maintain control was really _doing_ something to him.

He slid further down Billy’s length, slowly, seeing how much he could take. He choked, pulled back, running his hand up and down Billy’s cock as an apology. He sucked on the head, swirling his tongue around it like he would candy, earning another deep groan from Billy, before pushing down again. He didn’t go as far as before, but he moved his hand quickly over the exposed shaft while bobbing his head to make up for it.

Billy was moaning as Steve sucked, his hand in Steve’s hair just this side of painful, muscles tensing. It wasn’t going to take much more, Steve realized. He reached down with his free hand and began tugging on Billy’s balls, rolling them gently. And, the only warning Steve had was the shaking of Billy’s thighs before he came. Steve sputtered a little, pulling back. He swallowed a little and the rest landed across his lips and chin and neck.

Billy was flushed, his chest rising rapidly as he attempted to catch his breath. He stared at Steve, at his come covering Steve’s lips, at the hand still tangled tight in Steve’s hair. Steve wondered what Billy was seeing, what kind of picture he painted between Billy’s thighs.

Steve rose when Billy did, pulling Steve to him and licking the come from his lips. Kissing him deeply. Steve’s hips shifting, desperately hard from watching Billy.

“Please.” Steve groaned against Billy’s mouth.

“I got you.” Billy whispered. “Come here.”

Billy pushed Steve back so he was leaning against the arm of the couch, tugging his sweats down and pulling out Steve’s aching cock.

He was flushed from his neck to his dick, his chest rising and falling rapidly with his harsh breathing. Billy gripped him with a firm hand, pulling a groan from Steve’s lips, and jerked him hard and fast. He bent down to lick at the swollen head as he fisted the shaft and Steve was loosing it a little.

Billy eased the motion of his hand, sliding his lips further down Steve’s cock, taking him in. Steve’s mouth was open, panting as he watched Billy take his cock.

Steve was big, a lot of the girls he’d been with would rather just sit on his cock than try to fit it down their throat. Billy, hopefully, seemed like he wanted to do both.

“ _Fuck_ , Billy.” He whined between pants as Billy took more of him in his mouth.

Billy squeezed the base in response, sliding back up only to bob back down. He wasn’t going to last, not this time, not with Billy’s lips wrapped around his cock, his hands on Steve’s skin.

He whined again and Billy seemed to realize Steve was close. He brought his lips down, down, _down_ , until they were so far down his cock that Steve could feel the back of Billy’s throat. Steve’s hips _spasmed_ , his fingers tightening in the couch cushions, and came _hard_.

Billy sputtered only a little, swallowing around Steve’s cock, causing more to spirt. Steve felt winded and over-sensitive. Billy slowly slid off Steve’s cock and he shivered at the sensation.

“Holy fuck.”

Billy kissed up Steve’s body, nipping briefly beneath the curve of his jaw, causing Steve to hum, before finding his lips. He kissed the taste of himself off Billy’s lips, wondering if this was how Nancy felt after he would go down on her. He felt warm and _so_ comfortable with Billy’s weight atop him. He wrapped his arms around Billy, anchoring him there as they made out lazily.

“We should get cleaned up.” Billy said softly, running a gentle hand through Steve’s hair. “We’ll be late for dinner.”

They had “Family Dinner” tonight at the Byers. Joyce had started it a couple weeks ago, arguing that El needed to eat more than waffles and frozen pizza, and that Steve and Billy needed to be more social. Steve honestly thought it was just an excuse for Joyce and Hop to check in on Billy regularly without making him feel uncomfortable.

Billy seemed to enjoy the dinners, actually. It was just Joyce, Jonathan and Will, Hopper and El, and Steve and Billy. Sometimes Max would come if she could get away from Neil’s. Billy seemed relaxed there – a different relaxed from how he was with Robin, obviously different from how he was with Steve – but definitely comfortable.

Steve thought that was just Joyce’s effect. She was the type of mom that just… tried her best. She was warm in her own way, would give you the shirt off her back if she thought it would help. They didn’t have a lot of money, but they never turned away anyone that walked into that house.

Billy seemed to connect with the Byers’ vibe, and Steve wondered, not for the first time, what growing up in California had been like for him. He would never be comfortable in the Harrington’s large house the way he was at the Byers, that was certain.

Steve sighed, hugging Billy a little closer to him. Billy was right, they did need to get up. They still had to run to the store and get there early to help cook – Steve insisted, Joyce didn’t mind. But, he really didn’t want to move. Billy was a comforting weight and warmth that Steve was just dying to sink into.

Billy kissed beneath Steve’s jaw. “I mean it, Stevie. We gotta get up or we won’t make it to help Joyce.” Billy knew Steve hated leaving Joyce to do all the work. Billy never played fair.

He groaned, but unwrapped his arms from around Billy. “Fine.”

Billy snorted, leaving a final kiss against Steve’s throat and hauling himself up, pulling Steve with him to the bathroom.

They made it to the Byers’ only a little late, definitely more than enough time for Steve to help Joyce in the kitchen.

He watched Billy sit on the couch, Will and El immediately curling up next to him and vying for his attention. Jonathan looked on with a little smirky-smile from his spot in the armchair, laptop open. Hop leaned against the counter in the kitchen, distracting Joyce as she cooked with Steve.

Steve wondered if this was what it would’ve been like to grow up in a real family. The kind in tv shows, the kind where things may not be perfect, but at least they loved each other.

He had been so lonely for so long, that Steve hadn’t even realized that he wasn’t actually lonely anymore. He could remember the feeling acutely, but found that it didn’t linger in his chest like it use to.

The other kids started FaceTimeing, laughter and yelling coming from the living room. Billy and Jonathan groaning. Hop and Joyce playfully bickering. This phone pinging from Robin and Nancy texting in their little group chat.

And – Steve was _happy_.

When had that happened?

——

The kids had taken over the apartment.

School was closed for Easter break and because they lived in Indiana, it was cold and raining. So, the kids had taken it upon themselves to spend their break at Steve and Billy’s.

Which, Steve was being only a little bit of a sourpuss about – not enough to kick them out, but enough to pout. He wanted to have sex with Billy. He couldn’t do that with preteens running about.

“They’re not preteens.” Billy smirked into Steve’s neck, pressing him into the kitchen counter by the fridge, the kids screaming at the tv and whatever video game they were playing. “They’re all like, fourteen now.”

“Ugh.” Steve groaned. “Don’t remind me that my kids are getting so old.”

Billy just chuckled as he pulled away from Steve, going into the living room and stealing the controller out of Max’s hand to play against Lucas. All the kids crowded around him, El moving to casually drape herself over his shoulders while he played.

Steve felt himself warm at the image. At the kids comfortable enough to crowd up against him, and Billy comfortable enough to allow it. He whipped out his phone and took a picture before turning back to the dishes he’d been washing.

Will appeared next to him. He was getting so tall – they all were. He was chewing on his bottom lip, looking nervous.

“Hey.” Steve said carefully. “You alright?”

“Can I talk to you about something?” Will asked, turning his big eyes up to Steve.

“Of course. What’s up?”

Will looked between Steve and the living room. He leaned against the counter beside Steve and lowered his voice.

“Can I… can I ask you about your sexuality?” He asked timidly. “Is that okay?”

“Sure.” Steve replied evenly, also leaning against the counter, turning a little toward Will. “What do you wanna know?”

Will looked a little panicked again, eyeing the living room, a slight slump in his shoulders that Steve didn’t like.

“You dated girls.” He started. “You dated Nancy.”

Steve nodded, “I did. I was in love with her.”

Will looked up at Steve, something swirling in his big hazel eyes that Steve couldn’t name. He wondered if maybe this was more of a Billy conversation, but didn’t move from his spot.

“But you love Billy now?”

“I do.” Steve smiled.

They hadn’t said that yet. Not with words anyway. But Steve had known a long time ago how he felt about Billy. And, he knew how Billy felt about him.

“You’re Bi.” Will said confidently and Steve nodded.

“I am.”

“So it’s like, possible for someone to only date girls, but also, maybe, like boys too, but just not know it yet?”

Steve had a suspicion this was about what Billy told him that night when they got drunk for the first time – _Will’s in love with Mike_. He’d hadn’t really remembered that until right now.

“Sure, it’s possible.” Steve ran a hand through his hair. “But I’m pretty sure we’re not talking about you? And, we can’t really speculate about our friends. It’s not fair to push labels onto them, y’know?”

Will’s shoulders slumped again, his eyes falling to the floor. “Yeah.”

“Hey,” Steve placed his hand on Will’s neck, thumb brushing his cheek, bringing his gaze back up. “I know it sucks. Maybe you should tell him? He’s your best friend, the worst he’s gonna say is no.”

Will nodded, but his eyes welled. Steve sighed a little sadly, heart sort of breaking for Will. He’d been through so much the last couple years, Steve just wanted to shield him from the pains of growing up, however impossible that may be.

Steve brushed the first tear away with his thumb. Billy, somehow sensing the distress in the kitchen, handed off the controller to Max who hopped into his empty spot and took over, the others yelling at the tv in encouragement. He slid into the kitchen, placing a hand on Will’s shoulder, looking between him and Steve.

_Mike_ – Steve mouthed above Will. Billy nodded, pulling Will quickly out of the kitchen and herding him down the hall into the bathroom. Steve followed behind them, slower, watching as Dustin and Mike looked around.

“Billy.” Steve said to them. “Just a Billy thing.”

It seemed to appease them, returning back to the game and hollering at the screen. Will and Billy talked a lot about the Mind Flayer and being possessed, it wasn’t uncommon for them to just go off and talk quietly together.

Steve followed down the hallway, stopping at the partially closed bathroom door. He leaned against the wall, peering in silently.

Will was seated on the edge of the tub, crying quietly. Billy knelt below him, hands on Will’s knees, looking at him with such _soft_ eyes that it made Steve’s chest tighten a little.

“I…” He cried. “I just…”

“I know.” Billy whispered.

“I don’t know what to do.”

Billy nodded, “I know.”

Will wiped at his face. “He’s my best friend. But, I love him. And sometimes it just feels so _big_ like, how could I possibly keep it inside? Why can’t he just like boys? Why can’t he just like me back?”

“Look,” Billy gently grabbed his wrists. “Things were not easy for me growing up, with my dad…” He shook his head. “I had been with people I’d really liked before, but I’d never had a best friend, and I’d never been in love. And then I moved here. I met Steve. I was so pissed off and I assumed Steve was straight, and I made _a lot_ of horrible decisions because I was angry at my dad and thought a pretty boy didn’t like me back.”

Steve leaned further against the wall, placing his cheek against the plaster as he listened.

“Steve is my best friend. And I love him so much that it physically _hurts_.” Will’s face crumpled, nodding as tears slid down his cheeks. Billy brought his hands up to gently wipe them away, cupping Will’s face. “I know that it fucking sucks. I’ve been in love with him since I rolled into this shit town, I know exactly what it’s like to want someone you’re confident doesn’t want you back. But the thing is, you don’t actually _know_ that he doesn’t want you.”

“Steve said I should tell him.” Will muttered.

Billy shrugged a shoulder. “You won’t know unless you do. But it doesn’t have to be now. It doesn’t have to be until you’re ready, bud.”

Will was quiet for a moment, sniffling and staring down at his twisted fingers, leaning into the hands on his face. “I just see you and Steve and I just… I want that _so_ badly.”

“You’ll have that, I promise that you will. You just have to give it time. I waited for Steve – for a long time – and look how that turned out.” Will nodded, taking a deep breath and Billy moved one of his hands to card through Will’s hair. “It’s gonna suck for a while, I won’t lie to you. It makes everything hurt worse. But, eventually, it won’t be as bad. You’ll learn to live through it. You’re _so_ young, Will. There’s so much you don’t know.” Billy muttered. “But you can _always_ come to me and Steve. Always. I mean it. You know Steve will always answer.”

Will smiled a little at that. “I know. Steve’s the best.”

“Yeah,” Billy muttered fondly. “He is.”

“Can I…” Will shifted forward a little. “Can I hug you?”

“Of course you can, bud.” Billy shifted his arms open and Will slid into them

He wrapped himself around Billy, forcing him back into a sitting position on the floor, Will in his lap. Billy just held Will to him.

“You’re the best too, you know.” Will said gently. “Thank you.”

“Anytime, pal.”

Steve pulled away from the wall and wandered back to his other kids.

They stayed for a long time, playing games and eating pizza. Will rejoining them eventually, Billy coming up behind Steve and wrapping himself around him.

Eventually parents came one by one, Hopper offering to take Max home since they had essentially babysat El all day and would again until break was over.

They had the apartment to themselves once again and Steve barely waited until the Chief was gone before grabbing Billy and hauling him into Steve’s room.

He kissed Billy harshly and deeply, like he was trying to climb inside him. Billy gripped Steve tightly, pressing back just as much.

They got to Steve’s bed and he pulled back from Billy, panting and tugging his shirt over his head. Billy’s eyes traced over Steve’s torso, lingering over the little moles and dark freckles that stood out on his pale skin.

Billy pulled his own shirt over his head. Whatever hesitation he seemed to have earlier in the year about his scars didn’t seem to be that powerful anymore. He was starting to show his scars like a dare, like he wasn’t afraid to tell you what they cost. Steve found the little inkling of confidence wildly hot, reminded him that Billy could be a cocky asshole when he wanted to. Just like Steve.

Steve was pulling at Billy’s pants, tugging them down, eyeing the thick line of Billy’s dick. He only looked up when Billy’s hands gripped at Steve’s ass, grabbing his attention.

“I heard you talking to Will.” Steve said to the unasked question in Billy’s eyes. He pressed forward, unbuttoning his jeans and letting Billy push them down. “Fuck, you’re just so… good with him.”

Billy smirked a little as be stepped closer, skin pressing against skin. “That do it for you, Stevie?” He gripped Steve’s bare ass harder, pushing their cocks together. “Got a kink for me being nice?”

Steve rolled his eyes, “You’re an asshole.” He kissed Billy again until they were both out of breath. “But maybe.”

Billy snorted, smiling a little fondly at Steve. “You’re ridiculous.” He muttered, kissing Steve’s pouty lips and then his cheek, kissing all the way to his ear. “I wanna open you up. Can I, Stevie? You’ll like it, I promise.”

Steve just groaned loudly, his cock twitching against Billy’s. He pulled back to look at Billy. “You gonna fuck me?”

Billy’s pupils dilated fully, Steve watched the blue fade out almost completely. “If that’s what you want.” Billy said carefully. “Though, I’d also really like it if you fucked _me_. I’ve been thinking about this big fucking dick splitting me open since my first week of basketball.”

Steve was practically panting, staring at Billy, dick throbbing a little at the image. “I fucking knew you were looking at my dick.”

Billy rolled his eyes and maneuvered Steve onto the bed. “Of course I was looking at your dick, Steve.” Steve was on his back and Billy settled himself between Steve’s splayed thighs. “So, can I open you up?”

Steve was nodding so hard that Billy laughed a little, rummaging through Steve’s nightstand and grabbing his lube. He poured some over his fingers, leaning down to kiss along Steve’s stomach and hips.

“Ever done this to yourself, pretty boy?” Billy asked as a slick finger circled his hole.

“No.” Steve said a little shakily, his dick so fucking hard and Billy skipping over it in favor of sucking on his other hipbone. “I just – no.”

Billy’s smile felt good against his skin. He looked up at Steve from where his cheek laid against Steve’s hip. _Fuck_ , what a sight. “I promise to make it good for you. But pay attention, I want you to do it to me.”

Steve was nodded absently, mouth open and panting as Billy pushed the tip of a finger into him. Billy’s lips found his cock, weeping and already a little flushed. He licked over the head, pushing his finger in further until it reached his palm. He slid it in and out easily, tongue still kitten-licking. It felt fine, teasing and light.

Billy pulled out, added more lube and pushed in again, a second finger nudging at his hole. It just felt like pressure, but it didn’t hurt when Billy began pushing his fingers in and out. Once he thought Steve’s rim was loose enough, he began actually thrusting his fingers and that – _that_ felt good.

He moaned a little, hips twitching as Billy picked up the pace, crooking his fingers and feeling for something inside him. Steve had watched enough porn to know what he was looking for but was not at all prepared for Billy to find it. The pads of his fingers pressed against his prostate and Steve _literally_ jolted.

“Oh, _fuck_.”

Billy smirked above him – a shit-eating grin that Steve hadn’t seen since early Summer.

He thrusted his fingers a little faster, swiping against that spot. “You like that, pretty boy?”

Steve just nodded absently, eyes closed, mouth open, cock drooling.

“If I keep going like this, you’ll come. So the question is – this how you wanna come, Stevie?”

Billy leaned over him, pressing light kisses against his neck that did not at all match the _deep_ thrust of his fingers, whispering in that low voice of his.

“You wanna come like just like this, around my fingers?”

He fucked his fingers a little faster, a little _rougher_ , causing Steve’s eyes to squeeze shut as pleasure rippled up his spine.

“Do you wanna come on my cock?”

Steve’s breath _hitched_.

“Or, do you wanna come _inside_ me?”

Steve’s hips literally _spasmed_ and Billy snickered. “Looks like we have a winner.”

Billy rubbed _hard_ against Steve’s prostate, pulling a actual whine from his throat, before removing his fingers and tossing Steve the lube.

Steve caught it, barely, against his heaving chest and sat up to kneel in front of Billy. “Holy shit.” Steve muttered, cock leaking, still not over the feeling of Billy pressed inside him.

“I know, pretty boy.” Billy ran a hand through Steve’s wild hair. “I said you’d like it.”

“I did.” He nodded, leaning in to kiss Billy. “Almost blew my load right there.”

Billy groaned and Steve slicked up his fingers as Billy had. He reached down, touching the small pucker. Billy’s chest was already heaving, his blue eyes nearly black as he watched Steve from his propped elbows.

Steve pushed in, groaning a little at the tight heat. Fuck, this was going to feel amazing. He had to reach down and fist his dick, squeezing the base as he pushed all the way into Billy’s body.

He began thrusting his finger in and out, pressing harder and harder until Billy slapped at his shoulder and told him to add another. Steve added more lube, used to it being wetter, and pushed back in with two fingers, just as Billy had. Billy was moaning and shifting his hips, Steve was finger fucking him like he would a girl, but searching for his prostate at the same time.

“A-another one.” Billy said around a gasp.

So, Steve slicked up again and pushed in a third finger. It was tighter than the other two, but after thrusting his wiggling fingers in and out repeatedly, Billy’s hole became _loose_ and _wet_ and _fuck_ Steve wanted his cock in there.

He hooked his fingers on a thrust and Billy’s leg kicked out, a sharp gasp pulling from his chest. Steve smirked and prodded at that spot until Billy’s hips were grinding down against his palm and was moaning loudly with his head thrown back.

Billy’s cock was red and drooling against his stomach, abs tensing. He was panting as he pushed at Steve’s shoulder. “Good, it’s good.”

Steve pulled back, letting his fingers drag as he removed them. He couldn’t help but stare at Billy’s hole.

Billy bullied him back until Steve was leaning against the wall, Billy crawling into his lap. Steve gripped Billy’s thighs, watching as he slicked up Steve’s cock, then lifted up to guide himself down on it.

Steve’s head thunked back against the wall, his mouth open as his swollen cockhead pushed past Billy’s rim, a whine ripping out of him at the feeling of being enveloped in all that slick heat. Billy was panting, working himself down Steve’s length until Billy’s ass was firmly planted against Steve’s hips.

“Holy _shit_.” Billy moaned, body curling inward, hand planted on Steve’s shoulder.

Steve hands gripped painfully at Billy’s hips, trying not to come the moment he moved. It was a near thing – Billy shifting just slightly and Steve, already _so_ keyed up, leaned forward to stop him. Resting his head against Billy’s shoulder, face at his throat, arms wrapped tight around his back. Steve was breathing harshly into Billy’s collarbone, his cock _throbbing_ inside him.

Billy just waited, wrapping his arms around Steve’s shoulders, breathing into his ear, hand twisted in the back of his hair, dick hard and hot against Steve’s abs.

“ _Fuck_ , Billy.” Steve whined into his skin.

He felt strung out and Billy hadn’t even moved yet.

“ _Jesus_.” Billy groaned into his ear, shifting his hips just slightly, testing, teasing. “I feel so fucking _full_.”

Steve groaned at Billy’s words, the fucked out quality of his voice, the way he gripped at Steve just as tightly as Steve gripped at him.

He pushed his hips a little, letting Billy know he could move more if he wanted. Billy seemed to take that as a sign to go and pulled up his hips and slamming back down. They both groaned at the feeling and Billy did it again and again and _again_.

Steve was panting, vibrating out of his skin, as Billy began to fuck himself on Steve’s cock, big hands gripping at him. He made these punched-out little noises whenever he dropped down and would grind himself down with a little swivel of his hips that had Steve seeing stars.

He slid down so his back was against the bed, Billy above him, hands on Steve’s chest. He gripped Billy’s hips, planted his feet, and fucked up into Billy _hard_.

Billy’s head dropped forward with a moan that sounded almost painful. Honeyed curls hanging into his face, cheeks so red those sweet little freckles becoming much more prominent. Steve didn’t stop, he picked up the pace, pounded into Billy fast and needy. Billy’s eyes were screwed shut, his mouth dropped open as he took gasping breaths around moans that Steve _literally_ fucked out of him.

Steve was sweating and Billy was heavy on top of him – so much more solid than a girl had ever been. But Steve reveled in the feel of him, the way his cock bounced along with Steve’s thrusts, thick and drooling and red, the way Billy’s muscles flexed and the way that it hurt when he gripped Steve’s shoulders too tight.

There was no mistaking Billy for a girl – no matter how _pretty_ he was with his long eyelashes and his red mouth and his honeyed curls.

Steve was so close, _so close_. He was trembling, gasping, dying to come. He shifted slightly, readjusting his grip when Billy’s eyes shot open and he _whined_. Steve paused only for a second, brain catching up that Billy wasn’t in pain, before fucking up into that spot, pounding against it mercilessly.

Billy’s hand _flew_ to his cock, stripping it so quickly as Steve fucked him, thighs shaking. Noises that Steve would get off to for the rest of his _life_ falling out of Billy’s mouth as he stared down at Steve.

“ _Fuck._ Steve! Right there, fuck, right there.”

And then Billy was coming over Steve’s belly and chest, over and over again. He slumped, hand still on his cock, the other holding himself up on Steve’s chest. His breathing was labored and his eyes closed.

Steve sat up, wrapping his arms around Billy like he had before, causing Billy to sink all the way down on his cock. Billy let out a gasp at the feeling and Steve whined low in his throat, face tucked against Billy’s neck as he ground his hips into Billy’s ass.

Billy was probably oversensitive, kept making little grunts as he shifted against Steve’s cock. But, he just ground down, circling his hips, pushing against Steve until he squeezed Billy tight and came.

He was breathing harshly against Billy’s throat, hand coming down to grip Billy’s ass, clenched around his cock. Billy groaned, running his hands through Steve’s hair.

They stayed like that for a little while, until Steve’s breathing had slowed some. Steve let go of Billy and collapsed back against the bed. Billy rolled himself off of Steve to lay next to him, both of them hissing when Steve’s dick slid from Billy’s hole.

“Holy shit.” Steve breathed out, hand finding Billy’s beside him, tangling their fingers together.

“You’re telling me, pretty boy.” Billy huffed.

They laid there, breathing heavily, holding hands. Billy a warm line next to him, a comforting pressure against his side.

“Guess I should be nicer to the kids, huh?” He said after a while.

Steve just smacked his shoulder and Billy started laughing.

“And you call me ridiculous.”

“Oh, you are, princess. There’s no doubt about that.”

Steve rolled so he was curled up next to Billy. He tugged a loose curl between his fingers. “And yet, here we are.” He smiled.

Billy smiled back softly. “Yeah. Here we are.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, come shout at me over on tumblr! @ellieohno


	3. and one for your dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I decided to split the last chapter in two because I was having so much fun writing this & really didn't want it to end! I know my chapters tend to be pretty lengthy, so hopefully this is a bit more manageable for those who asked for shorter chapters. 
> 
> Thank you all so much for your continued support & kind words! This fandom is really sweet and I'm so happy to be a part of it even in a small way!! 
> 
> As always, feel free to come yell at me over on tumblr!

Steve leaned over to grab another beer, cracking it open and taking a sip. It was warmish out, April defrosting the fields and and the lakes in preparation for spring. 

They were at the Quarry – a place, Billy had realized, he’d never been with Steve.

It was a school night, late enough that no one’d be out, but early enough for them to take some time. Billy had all but shoved him into the Camaro, placed the six pack on his lap, and turned up the music as they drove.

“I dreamed about being out here with you.” He said to Steve when they pulled up and slipped out to sit in the cool night air, confusion in Steve’s eyes. “When we weren’t friends. Before that night, after. I use to think about rolling up after getting into it with Neil and finding you out here.”

He slid closer to Billy on the trunk, pressing his shoulder into Billy’s. “Oh yeah? And what would we do?”

Billy shrugged, playing with the tab on the can. “Talk.” He said simply. “Sometimes I’d imagine that I’d get you to kiss me.”

Steve didn’t like the sadness lining Billy’s voice at the thought. He leaned forward and gently pressed a kiss to Billy’s lips. “You can kiss me now.” He whispered.

Billy huffed around a small smile, leaning his forehead against Steve’s. “Yeah, I can.”

They sat on Billy’s car and talked quietly as they drank their beer. It was soothing, sitting in the dark, crisp air settling over them. Held a certain secret quality to it that made Billy’s tongue a little loose.

He talked a lot about Steve. About his feelings. About how he felt the first time he saw Steve,  spoke to him, played against him on the court. About how he’d felt consumed by his affection and how angry it made him to see Steve with Nancy, and then Robin.

“I literally never thought you’d go for me.” He murmured around  his  one allotted cigarette . “Aside from the fact that you were wildly straight, it just seemed like you’d always be hung up on Wheeler.”

Steve shook his head, “I haven’t loved Nancy in a long time.”

Billy looked at him for a long moment, it was something Billy of yore used to do frequently. “When did that change?” He asked evenly.

Steve shrugged. “I don’t know, exactly. It hurt to see her and Jonathan together for a while, but… they were the only ones I had at the time. I just noticed that it started bothering me less and less, and by summer… I don’t think I cared much at all.”

“What happened between you and Hagan?” Billy asked, bypassing his answer completely.

“Tommy?” Steve asked incredulously. “Why?”

Billy shrugged, took a hit, took a sip. “Always wondered. He whined about you constantly. Seemed like there was unresolved history there.”

Steve smirked, leaned close. “You askin’ if I ever made out with Tommy?”

“No.” Billy’s eyes narrowed. “Should I?”

Steve snorted, lips stretching wide into a silly smile. “Nah. We were best friends growing up.” The smile faded. “He didn’t like Nancy. Didn’t get why I wanted to go out with her. Pushed me to be an asshole and do shit that made me uncomfortable because that’s what was  _ expected _ , or whatever. We stopped being friends the year before you moved here.”

“Gave up your crown and your lackeys followed?”

“Something like that.” Steve smiled ruefully. “Between his attitude about Nancy and all the shit going on with the Upside Down… it was easy to walk away, to just not care.”

Billy took another sip of beer, shoulder pushed into Steve’s. It felt real, tethered him to the now instead of the then. “He talked about you all the time.”

“Tommy?”

“Yeah.” Billy nodded, flicking the bud of the cigarette away. “A lot of it was just bullshit, about how you’d turned bitch or whatever, mean shit. But he was a well of information when it came to you and I gobbled that shit right up.”

“Because you were in love with me.” Steve smiled cheekily, lying his head on Billy’s shoulder and looked up at him.

“Shut up.” Billy blushed and smiled a little back. 

“You could’ve just talked to me, y’know.”

Billy raised a brow, “Would you’ve wanted me to?”

Steve thought about it for a moment, tried to go back and sit in the feelings he’d had for Billy when he had first arrived. “Well, in the beginning I would have. If you hadn’t been all aggressive and pushy I might’ve even wanted to be your friend.”

A hand made its way up to Steve’s hair, petting it gently. Billy sighed, “Yeah, I know. I fucked that up.”

“Why?” Steve asked softly.

He’d been dying to know since Billy first rolled in and locked eyes with Steve. Billy had mentioned briefly that Neil hadn’t liked that  _ he had a thing for pretty boys _ and Steve now knew that Neil also roughed Billy up. But he didn’t know  _ why _ Billy had targeted Steve when he first moved here, not really.

Billy played with the can between his thighs and Steve’s hair, looked out over the water. “Neil always knew. About me. Was always suspicious of who I was hanging with and why. But when you’re too rough and bully your way to the top, everyone’s looking. If everyone’s looking, there’s nothing for Neil to see.”

“I guess that makes sense.”

“The first day I saw you, I knew I was in trouble.” Billy let his thumb drag along the shell of Steve’s ear, brush along his jaw. “You were with Nancy and you didn’t take my shit and I just wanted your eyes on me.”

“They were.” Steve admitted.

“That so?” He could hear the slight smile in Billy’s voice.

“Yeah.” Steve sighed. “You were kind of hard to miss.”

Billy snorted, hand cupping Steve’s neck and jaw. “I don’t think I would have let this happen before. No matter how much I wanted it.”

“Because of your dad?”

“I just…” He took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. “Was so used to hiding. Making myself small. And I know that sounds crazy, because I’m nothing if not  _ too much _ , but… I’m not good at… being myself. Or, I wasn’t.”

Steve curled an arm around Billy’s waist, head still on his shoulder. “How about now?”

“I think I’m getting there.” He nodded. “I think coming back, living with you, talkin’ to Dr. Laura and Owens, it changed something. I’ve felt… freer. Like I don’t need everyone watching. Like I don’t have to hide.”

He squeezed Billy tight with the arm around him. “I’m glad. I… I probably wouldn’t have let it happen either. I was heartbroken and angry, I wouldn’t have been nice to you in the way you needed. Not then.” He kissed Billy’s neck sweetly. “But I thought about it. Even when I didn’t like you, I wanted you.”

Billy snorted, pulled Steve’s head up from his shoulder to give him a kiss. “Well, you got me now.”

“Yeah I fucking do.” He smiled, Billy laughed.

Billy pulled Steve in for another kiss. Slow and deep, hands cradling his face like he was something precious. Steve felt his chest swell and his ears burn, he gripped Billy’s wrists to keep his hands in place.

Kisses left his lips and trailed over his cheeks, and nose, eyes, and forehead. Billy murmured gently into his skin, “I’m sorry, Steve. I’m sorry that I ever hit you. I’m sorry that I made you hate me.”

Steve wrapped his arms around Billy’s back, hugging him to Steve’s body. “I know, Billy. It’s over, we’ve moved on.”

“I’ll never hurt you again.” He whispered.

“I know.” Steve whispered back. “I won’t hurt you either, I promise.”

Billy rested his forehead against Steve’s, eyes closed, thumbs running gently over his jaw. “I love you.” He said so softly that Steve almost didn’t hear him.

His heart thumped off-rhythm, his breathing shaky. He knew already, that Billy loved him. Could feel it in every smile and every unspoken word. But  _ hearing _ it was something else entirely.

“I love you more.” Steve said quietly against Billy’s skin.

“That couldn’t possibly be true.”

Steve’s chest felt too heavy, like it would burst. The honest conviction in the way Billy said it was too much. Like there was no other possibility – Billy loved Steve more and that was fact.

It hadn’t felt like this with Nancy. He hadn’t felt like he couldn’t breath, like she was consuming him. Being with Nancy had felt easy and right, comfortable. That wasn’t to say he didn’t feel those things with Billy – he did. But, he felt  _ more _ too. There was a  _ want _ and a  _ need _ , a desire to curl up inside him and never leave. Nancy hadn’t liked his clinginess, Billy seemed to crave it.

He would never dismiss his relationship with Nancy or what they shared. She was his first love, and he knew that she had loved him in her own way. But Steve wasn’t her big love, and he was finding, she might not have been his.

“It’s late, you have school in the morning.”

Billy kissed him gently on the lips. “Let’s go home.”

_ Home _ .

Billy’s  _ home _ was the apartment, with Steve.

He couldn’t wipe the smile off his face if he tried.

——

The days filtered in and out. Billy went to school, Billy went to work, Billy came home to be with Steve.

Steve worked with Robin, worked without her, took the kids places, curled up with Billy. 

April faded into May, graduation looming closer. Robin talked about schools, Billy didn’t. The kids talked about summer and all the things they wanted to do.

Steve let himself linger in it. Grounded himself in the present – in Billy’s soft smiles and Robin’s rolled eyes and Jonathan’s quiet laughs and the kids’ enthusiasm. 

Let himself live in the moment of happiness, without worry, without doubt.

Things would change eventually, and that made his chest heavy, but right now everything was tinted rose gold. He was  _ happy _ . Actually happy.

And it was… nice.

Nice to wake up next to Billy, to have his warm body wrapped around his own. To count the sweet freckles over his nose and the dark lashes that fanned out over his cheeks. To watch the way his too-blue eyes changed colors depending on his mood and the way his lips would quirk when Steve or the kids said something charming.

How he was becoming more and more comfortable, becoming more and more himself. 

Steve was taking it one day at a time and for the first time enjoying it.

——

He was bent over the back of the couch, hands fisting the cushions, mouth dropped low as Billy  _ licked  _ into him. 

Steve’s cock twitched when Billy tugged on the rim with his tongue, moaned at the way it felt to have Billy’s hands spreading him open.

He’d been at it for a while. Steve’s hole felt wet and sloppy, but so,  _ so _ , good. Billy wanted to see how long it took for Steve to start begging.

Billy pulled his mouth away, breathing a little labored, like Steve’s. “How you doing, pretty boy?”

“ _ Fucking _ _ hell _ , Billy.”

A hand gripped firmly at one of his cheeks, he could hear the smile in Billy’s voice. “Told ya it’d feel good.”

“Yeah.” Steve sighed, hips moving a little. “Wanna do it to you.”

“You can.” Billy said with a calmness Steve did not feel with how hard his dick currently was. “But, I still haven’t heard you beg yet.”

Steve felt slick fingers prod his messy hole and groaned when Billy slid in with little resistance. Breath catching when Billy fucked back into him with two.

He held onto the back of the couch tightly as Billy fucked him, hips pushing back onto his fingers. He jolted when Billy pressed against his prostate, breath high in his throat as he ground his hips back against Billy’s fingers.

“Please.” He moaned, eyes shut.

“One more finger, Stevie, and I’ll give you what you want.” Billy said gently.

Steve nodded frantically, forehead pressed against the top of the couch. Billy pushed back in with three fingers and  _ dragged _ them as he fucked in and out quickly, ripping a moan from Steve’s throat.

“Fuck, pretty boy, you look so good like this.”

Billy sounded strained, like he was holding back. Steve felt his cock drag against the couch as Billy fingered him hard. He couldn’t even respond to the praise because he was going to  _ come _ .

He was whining a little, hips pushing back to meet Billy’s thrusts, fingers dragging relentlessly over that fucking spot. Steve’s hand immediately dropped to grip at his aching cock, fisting himself hard and fast as he fucked back onto Billy’s fingers. His breath caught in his throat at a particularly well-timed thrust, he seized up and came ridiculously hard, thighs shaking. 

Billy seemed desperate at the sight of Steve’s cock, red and swollen and hanging between his spread thighs, coming from just fingers. He pulled them out of Steve and kissed up Steve’s back to his neck, cock so hard and hot against Steve’s cheeks.

“Fucking hell, Steve.” He groaned softly in Steve’s ear, making him shiver. “You need a minute?”

Steve nodded, breathing heavy, and Billy just kept himself draped over Steve’s back, pressing lips to his skin.

Once Steve caught his breath and didn’t feel so wrung out, he pressed his shoulders back into Billy’s chest. “Okay, I’m ready.”

Billy kissed him, gently, sweetly. Pulling back just enough to slip his hands down to grab more lube. Steve felt like he was  _ dripping _ , but Billy just slicked himself up and pressed his cockhead against Steve’s rim.

Billy was  _ thick _ . Girthy and wide and  _ fat _ . Fuck, even the head was bulbous. It pushed in and Steve gasped, cock fully hard so soon again that he felt a little dizzy.

Billy pushed in slowly, making these little punched-out noises that made Steve throb. It felt like forever before Billy bottomed out, hips flush with the meat of Steve’s ass. They both groaned loudly at the feeling, Steve felt Billy shaking.

Steve was already stripping his cock  _ hard _ , couldn’t hold back, eyes shut as he panted. Billy was holding onto his hips like he was going somewhere. And then he slowly slid out and  _ thrust _ back in.

A noise Steve did not know he was capable of making ripped out of him at the feeling. Billy seemed obsessed with it and kept trying to pull it out of Steve again and again.

Getting fucked was not what Steve thought it’d be. Objectively, he knew it’d feel good – girls liked it, Billy  _ really _ seemed to like it. Steve had just assumed he too would like it. He was absolutely unprepared for  _ how _ much he’d like it.

He felt so  _ full _ . Stretched and needy and strung out. Every shift and pull and snap of Billy’s hips sent a little  _ zing _ of pleasure rippling up his spine. It felt like Billy playing with his prostate and deep throating his cock at the same time – a lot of ridiculously incredible sensations.

Billy gripped his cheeks, spread them wide and fucked harshly into him. Steve moaned loudly, holding the back of the couch tightly with the hand that wasn’t flying over his aching cock. He probably looked obscene – mouth open, eyes shut, flushed down to his dick, moans and slick slapping flesh loud around them.

Steve pushed back on Billy’s cock and groaned low in his throat at how good it felt, grinding back as Billy fucked in.

“Harder.” He whined.

Billy was panting, but just gripped at Steve’s skin and began  _ pounding  _ into him. Steve made that sound again, hand flying over his dick, twisting around the sensitive head and shaking with the sensation. Billy was actually whining as he fucked into Steve.

And that was how Max and Mike and Will found them.

The apartment door flew open, as it always did when Max showed up, and suddenly the kids were in the doorway, staring at them. They’d stopped immediately in their tracks, words dying in their throats, and Steve, horrified, slapped Billy’s thigh to get him to stop.

“ _ Billy _ .” He hissed.

Billy was still hard inside him, Steve could feel him  _ throbbing _ . Fuck.

They were both out of breath, staring at the kids, who stared back in varying levels of shock.

Max looked absolutely horrified and disgusted at seeing her brother in such a way. Will was completely red faced, eyes downcast in embarrassment. And Mike, well, Mike was looking at them with his jaw dropped, his eyes glazed over as they roamed over all the naked skin on display. At least the couch covered all the really inappropriate bits – that was something, right?

“What the fuck, Maxine.” Billy growled. “Don’t you know how to fucking  _ knock _ .”

That seemed to kickstart Max and her face twisted quickly to anger. “What the fuck yourself!” She turned around so she was no longer facing them, the boys still staring. “This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me! I  _ did not _ need to know these things about you!”

“Hey, pipsqueaks.” Billy snapped at Mike and Will, who looked up to him a the command. “Turn the fuck around.”

Will immediately turned on his heel, throwing hands over his eyes for good measure. Mike let his gaze sweep over them once more before slowly turning around.

“Did you shits need something?” Billy asked, tone annoyed, hands gripping Steve’s hips tightly, still hard inside him. Steve tried not to gasp at the feeling.

Max had her arms crossed tightly over her chest, shoulders tense. “We wanted to go to the movies.”

“Call Robin, or Jon.” Billy said tersely. “Get out, we’ll check in later.”

Max gave a little growl and shoved the boys out the door, slamming it loudly behind her. Steve sagged, face pressed against the couch. 

“Ugh.” Steve groaned. “That was  _ so  _ embarrassing.”

Steve was about to turn to look over at Billy when he just started slamming back into Steve without any preamble. A long moan left Steve’s lips as Billy began the brutal pace back up and nailed his slightly sensitive prostate over and over. 

He couldn't help but laugh around the moan because that really had been ridiculous and mortifying.

Billy pouted as he fucked into Steve, “Don’t laugh. I was  _ so  _ fucking close.” He whined.

Steve was fucking himself back on Billy’s cock, meeting his thrusts. “I’m sorry, baby.” He shivered at how good it felt.

Billy pulled out quickly and Steve gasped at the sensation of his hole empty and fucked out. Billy hauled him off the couch and quickly moved them to his bed. Steve was barely on his back before Billy was on him.

When he slid back in, they both groaned loudly. Billy gripped Steve’s thighs and pushed his hips up, slamming into him. Hips driving down over and over again, pace almost punishing. 

Steve was panting around a moan, Billy fucking down into him and swiveling his hips. Steve’s knees pressed into Billy’s ribs, squeezing as Billy pounded into him.

“Come on, come  _ on _ .” He gripped too hard at Billy’s shoulders, back arching as he bore down on Billy’s cock.

He was close,  _ so _ close. The slapping sounds of Billy’s hips hitting Steve’s ass on every hard thrust were loud around them, Billy’s groans piercing through.

Billy slid his grip up Steve’s thighs, pushing his knees back, back,  _ back _ , tilting his hips and changing the angle completely. Steve arched at a particularly hard thrust that took his breath away, hand immediately coming down to harshly strip his leaking cock. Billy was leaning over him,  _ drilling _ into his loose hole, whining and moaning, staring down at where he was fucking so thoroughly into Steve.

His orgasm came as a surprise and darkened his vision. He came hard and fast, head tossed back, a sound he couldn’t hear ripped from his throat. 

Billy seemed wild because of it, fucked deeper into him as Steve clenched tightly around him, coming hard enough to wind him. He held himself above Steve, still pushing thighs into his chest, breathing too heavily. They stayed like that for a moment, Billy coming back to himself and slowly sliding out of Steve, easing his legs down.

“Jesus Christ.” Steve croaked, feeling heavy and exhausted and too warm.

Billy still knelt between his thighs, breathing still a little labored, chest rosy, though nothing compared to the beet-red of Steve’s, eyes trained on Steve’s hole. He watched, transfixed, as his come slowly leaked out of Steve, which Steve knew from fucking Billy was  _ hot _ , but also possessive and a little gross.

When he saw Billy’s dick give a little twitch, Steve kicked Billy in the rib, grabbing his attention.

“Absolutely not. I’m literally too exhausted to move.”

He sent Steve his own puppy-eyed look and Steve wondered if this is what he looked like when Billy called him  _ Bambi _ . 

“What?” He asked innocently.

Steve shook his head. “Don’t puppy-eye me. You  _ literally  _ just finished fucking me, it cannot be possible to go again so soon.”

Billy smiled slowly and widely, like a damn Cheshire cat, crawling over Steve and gently laying atop him so every part of them were touching. He dropped the lightest kiss on Steve’s neck.

“I mean… it’s not  _ impossible _ .”

“You’re ridiculous.”

“You’re sexy as hell.”

Steve snorted, wrapping his hands around Billy’s back, reveling in the weight of him. “Yeah, I fucking know.”

Billy laughed against Steve’s neck, burrowing in. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Think the little shits will ever be able to look us in the eye.”

Steve shrugged, “I'd say no, but they’re resilient. So, who knows.”

——

Steve had been out with the kids all day. Dustin needed to go to some store in the mall which meant all the kids needed something from the mall, apparently. 

And, since their mall had basically blown up, Steve had to drive them to the next closest mall which was two towns over.

But, he was the best babysitter, so he did it. He let them all pile into his car and fuck with the radio and the aux cable, let them yell and laugh and sing really loud the whole way there.

Max, Will, and Mike still weren’t looking at him.

Well, Max would. Mostly to glare. But the boys literally wouldn’t make eye contact. He noticed they also weren’t sitting together, like, at all. He made a note to text Will later and see if he was alright. 

They all split up immediately as soon as they got to the mall. The girls running in some direction, Dustin dragged Will to the game store, and Mike pushed Lucas to the food court.

Steve had let them do their thing, grabbed some hot pretzels and meandered around Target for an hour, leaving with some grocery items and a bunch of shit he hadn’t needed. He went back to the car and called Nancy, making her keep him company while he waited for the kids.

He also sort of wanted to see if Mike had mentioned anything about walking in on him and Billy. Nancy probably would’ve texted him if Mike had, but, you never know.

“Where’s Billy?” She asked, writing out flashcards on her bed.

“Uh…” Steve thought about it. “I think he’s home? Maybe he’s at the gym, but he’s not working today.”

She nodded, looking between her index cards and her notebook. “He didn’t come with you?”

“We’re not attached at the hip.” Steve rolled his eyes before scratching the back of his hair, he needed a trim soon. “I also kind of didn’t invite him.”

Nancy looked up at him, brows furrowed, eyes concerned. “I thought things were going well?”

“They are!” He said quickly, realizing how that  may have  sounded. “Things are great. Billy’s great. I just didn’t think Billy and the mall would be a good idea.”

Nancy nodded, face relaxing. “Yeah, probably a good call. I don’t know how, but I keep forgetting that he like, actually  _ died _ .”

Steve felt his chest  _ tighten _ at her words. “Yeah, I know what you mean.” He muttered. “He died in a fucking mall of all places, so I figured he’d probably never want to go back to one.”

Nancy looked at him for a moment, fingers fiddling with the marker in her hand. “How’s he doing? Really.”

Steve ran a hand through his hair and sighed. “Pretty good. He still goes to therapy every week, but his checkups are down to only once a month. Owens all but cleared him. I think he’s… better. Or, he’s trying, anyway.”

“That’s all you can  hope for.” Nancy nodded.

“Yeah.” Steve trailed off. 

Nancy knew they were together, because everyone sort of knew they were together after Robin had practically announced it in the café. But, she didn’t  _ know _ and he realized that he wanted to tell her.

“I’m in love with him.”

Nancy just looked at him for a long time. She didn’t seem upset, she didn’t even seem all that surprised. She just …  looked at him. Let her eyes sweep over his face and his hair and the look in his eyes.

“I know.” She said finally. And then, “I’m happy for you.”

Steve deflated, exactly like Nancy had when he’d said the same thing about her and Jonathan.

“Thanks.”

“Has he thought about college?” She asked instead, moving on from the moment between them.

“I actually don’t know.” Steve cleared his throat. “I haven’t asked. I’m sure he’ll let me know what he wants to do.”

“Think he’ll go back to California ?” She asked lightly, going back to her flashcards, pretending the question didn’t hold weight.

“Maybe.” He shrugged.

“Think you’ll go with him?”

“Maybe.” He tried not to let the sincerity in his voice pitch too high.

The kids eventually piled back into the car, shouting about their hauls and showing Steve everything in their bags. He dropped them off one by one.

Steve pushed into the apartment to find Jonathan sitting next to Billy on the couch, music blaring from the stereo.

It was something loud, though not what Billy normally listened to. He was bopping along, gesturing to Jonathan when a particular riff hit him just right and Jonathan would smile back all wide like,  _ I know, man! _

Music was kind of Jonathan’s thing, only second to Photography. He’d been sending Billy playlists since he got out of the hospital – his way of reaching out.

Billy also liked music, and had seemed oddly touched that some kid he hardly knew would take the time to curate music for him. That was the start of their friendship, Steve realized.

They would text each other about music, send recommendations and soundcloud links. Talk about books and bands and venues they’d always wanted to visit.

Jonathan and Billy were two people that, on the surface, shouldn’t go together. Like Billy and Steve, like Nancy and Jonathan. But, Billy seemed to enjoy Jonathan’s quiet nature and sleepy eyes, liked his soft voice and gentle presence.

“Hey.” Steve said, voice tired.

They both looked up at him as he fully entered the space. Smiling as he came and sat on the couch, leaning heavily into Billy’s side.

“How was the mall?” Jonathan asked with a smirky little smile.

He felt Billy tense a little and pushed harder against him in return. “Ugh.” He groaned. “It was fine. They’re just a lot when they’re all together, you know?”

“You have the patience of a saint, Steve.”

“That’s why I have a mug that says  _ World’s Best Babysitter _ .” Steve shrugged.

“Didn’t you buy that for yourself?”

Steve threw a pillow at Jonathan’s head, causing him to  do that breathy  laugh him and Will were known for .

“Jonny was telling me some interesting stories while you were gone.” Billy’s got that damn smirk tucked into the corners of his lips, eyes a little sharp and predatory. 

Steve groan ed . “What now.”

“Oh, you know.” Billy sa id innocently. “Just some old war stories about  _ King Steve _ and some from after. Like how you two kissed, apparently.”

Steve glared at a smirking Jonathan. “One time! It was one time! And on a dare.”

“ _ Nancy _ dared us to, so I wouldn’t really say that was actually a  _ dare _ -dare.”

Billy’s smirked widened. “Damn, Wheeler’s a little perv, huh?” Neither Steve or Jonathan said anything, which  _ said _ everything, which caused Billy to bark out a laugh.

“Shut up.” Steve leaned up to smother Billy with a pillow, only intensifying his cackling. He glared at Jonathan while holding Billy down. “What else you’ve been slandering me about?”

Jonathan was laughing quietly, smile wide as he watched the two of them. No one was under any delusion that Steve was stronger than Billy, but he played along and let Steve hold him down on the couch like the good boyfriend he was.

“Honestly, not much. Billy asked about some old King Steve shit Tommy had told him and we kind of ended up post-Stancy.”

“Yuck. Hate that.” Steve made at face at the  _ ship-name _ and released Billy from his hold. “What’d you wanna know about King Steve? I would’ve told you.” He pouted.

Billy leaned up and gently kissed the pout – which, Steve had not been expecting in front of Jonathan. But was presently surprised, nonetheless.

“Jonny’s a watcher, he sees all the things. I wanted an untainted perspective of the absolute slut you use to be.”

Billy started cackling when Steve jabbed him in the side. “You’re one to talk, asshole. How many moms did you fuck again?”

“Actually none.” He raised a brow at Steve, smirk confident. “All rumors, sweetness. Now, that’s not to say they didn’t want me to.”

Billy gave them a saucy wink and it was the most Billy of yore he’d ever been, Steve honestly felt transported. If it weren’t for the shorter hair and the scars and the way Billy’s fingers were gently caressing the bare skin of his hip, Steve would’ve totally believed he’d been  _ Back To to the Future _ -ed.

“You’re disgusting.” Steve said sweetly, kissing Billy quickly.

Jonathan just watched them from his side of the couch with a smile.

“I’m really happy you guys are together.” He said softly, but meaningfully, in that way of his. “I don’t think I’ve told you that, so, I just wanted you to know.” He smiled down at his hands picking at the faded fabric of his jeans. “And I’m really glad we’re friends.”

Steve felt his chest swell. There was a time that he hated Jonathan, was  _ cruel _ to him. Now he couldn’t imagine his life without him. How they’d gotten to this place of best friendship, Steve wasn’t sure, but he was really glad they did.

“Love you too, Jonathan.” He turned to Billy. “There’s not anything I actually don’t want you to know. You can ask whoever you want.”

Billy gripped Steve’s hip in acknowledgment. “I mean, I’m not about to call Nancy and start comparing notes,” Steve flushed and rolled his eyes, Jonathan just blushed like he did whenever anyone brought up  _ Stancy _ . “But thanks for the permission, pretty boy.”

“Did Jonathan at least tell you about the time Tommy and I did synchronized gainers into my pool while simultaneously shotgunning beers?”

Billy just looked a him a little wide-eyed, like he hadn’t imagined Steve could ever be so cool. “Seriously?”

Steve rolled his eyes toward Jonathan. “Dude, come on! You’re gonna tell all my messy hoe shit but none of cool shit that actually made me popular?”

Jonathan rolled his eyes good-naturedly. “I’m sorry, Steve, I hadn’t realized letting Tommy talk you into almost killing yourself  w as  _ cool shit _ . My bad.”

Steve threw another pillow at him. When did they get so many throw pillows? Just another sign that the kids and Robin held way too much power in Steve’s life.

“Jonathan once hotboxed my car so much that we literally couldn’t see out the  windows  and then his mom knocked  to  ask if we wanted sandwiches. He was so high that he actually cried when Joyce walked away.” Steve laughed at the memory of Jonathan weeping in Steve’s arms, afraid his mom wouldn’t give him the sandwich as punishment.

“You guys are fucking idiots.” Billy laughed around a smile.

“We’re from a small town, man.” Jonathan shrugged. “You know there’s like, nothing to do here.”

They sit around and talk for a while. It’s comfortable with Jonathan, who’s got an easy presence and a quiet nature. Him and Billy seem to vibe with each other in a way Steve was positive they wouldn’t have before. Billy is loose and easy on the couch, with Steve tucked beside him.

It’s a good night. A nice way to end the day Steve had running the kids around – which both Billy and Jonathan like to tease him for. He misses hanging out with Jonathan and promises himself that they’ll see him more. It would probably be good for Billy to have other friends too. Maybe Steve can get Billy to take Jonathan on his runs or force them to go see a movie or something.

Eventually Jonathan leaves and Billy demands Steve’s full attention now that he’s gone. Steve lets Billy arrange him how he’d like, drape himself across Steve’s body, and force Steve to play with his hair while some tv show played.

Steve liked when Billy got all bossy and growly and a bit demanding. Billy liked when Steve was a little bit of a brat. 

They laid like that for a while, stayed like that when El FaceTimed to say hi, and when Robin called to bitch about homework. They laid like that until bedtime, until Billy hauled Steve up and fireman-carried him to Steve’s room, smiling at Steve’s loud laughter.

——

It’s late, a school night. Steve’s eyes won’t open totally and everything sounds a little muffled, but he’s waking up when Billy sits up next to him. He’s grabbing his phone from the little bedside table, answering with a groggy whisper.

“Max?”

Steve rolls over, rubbing his eyes to see Billy more clearly. He can hear her on the phone, because the room is silent otherwise. She’s crying, big gulping breaths and shaking vibrato.

“B-Billy.” She cries and Billy looks pained as he clutches the phone to his ear.

“Maxine, what’s wrong?”

“Come get me.”

Billy is out of the bed in an instant, pulling on clothes, muttering softly to Max as he did. Steve moves too, pulling on a shirt and slipping into shoes, grabbing his glasses and following Billy out the door.

Max cries the whole way there. Deep, childlike sobs that have Steve’s heart breaking. He doesn’t know why she’s crying, but it must be bad if she is. Max doesn’t show weakness like that often – unlike Billy who’s tough exterior can easily crack for tears.

The Camaro flies across town in a way Hawkins hadn’t seen since early summer, almost a year ago now. It’s May, its not cold out exactly but a little chilly at night. 

Billy’s hands are tight on the steering wheel, Max on speaker phone as he whispered soothing things to her. They get closer to Cherry Lane and Steve realized that this is the first time Billy would be back there since his return. 

The street is dimly lit, the house dark, Billy tells Max they’re here and suddenly she’s running from the side of the house where her window is. Billy is out of the car quickly, coming to meet her on the lawn. Max is still crying, her face beet-red, hair stuck to her cheeks. 

She literally runs into Billy’s arms, wrapping her own around his neck, legs instantly coming up to wrap around his waist. She’s too big for this, but Billy grips her tightly, arms around her back, holding her to him. He looks shocked, eyes wide as he looks at Steve – still in the car and unsure of what to do.

Billy just holds her for a moment, let’s her cry into his neck. Eventually he walks back over to the car. Steve has the window down, hanging out of it with his concerned doe-eyes on full display.

Billy brings a hand up to cradle Max’s head, he’s close enough now that Steve can hear him whisper to her. 

“What’s the matter, Max? Are you hurt?”

“N-no.” 

Steve gets out of the car and herds the Billy-Max shaped thing down so Billy is sitting with her in his lap, feet on the curb. Steve kneels by them in the dewy grass, leaning against the open car door. He smooths a hand up her back, Billy just holding her tightly, eyes wide and unsure of what to do.

“You’re okay.” He whispers into her hair, just holding her to him.

And it’s heartbreaking to watch. Max is fourteen and definitely not small or young enough to be wrapped around Billy like she is. But, Steve’s been there. He knows the weight of a kid  _ clinging _ to you, knows the feeling of your heart sinking as they won’t let you go. She’s too old for this and that’s why it’s distressing.

“I-I… had a dream, that you were dead again.” She took shuttering breaths around sobs. “You were dead and I was alone and I couldn’t remember what was real.”

Steve felt his own eyes water at the way she choked around the words, at the way they mirrored his own fears.

Billy was crying into Max’s hair, cradling her in his arms. Steve knelt below, hands on both of them, soothing the best he could.

Max eventually stopped crying, stopped clinging quite so hard. Her breathing slowing from the rabbit-fast pace it’d been, her nose clogged.

“Steve.” Her voice was tired. “Can you scratch my back?”

Steve was still gently rubbing a hand up and down. He knew what she wanted, had watched her and El and Will do it every time they were together, seen Billy do it at the apartment. A familial comfort thing, he tried not to feel too touched that she was asking him.

“Of course.”

He caught Billy’s eye, seeing how now that Max was calm, he was too. Steve slid his hand up the back of her sleep shirt and ran his short nails over her too warm skin. She burrowed into Billy like a cat.

Steve kept his other hand on Billy, twisting their fingers together and rubbing his thumb over Billy’s knuckles.

They all sat like that for a while, the dash read  _ three twenty-four _ . Max wasn’t asleep, but she was quiet, Billy just leaning his cheek against the crown of her head, Steve scratching her back and holding Billy’s hand.

Billy eventually pulled back a little to look at her. Tucked the hair sticking to her cheeks behind her ears. Thumb gently wiping under her eyes. 

“You alright?” He asked softly.

She nodded.

“We’ve got school in the morning. Think you’ll be okay for a couple hours?”

She nodded again, pulling a deep breath into her lungs. “I’m okay.”

Billy just stared at her for a moment, hands still holding her face. Steve wondered what he saw when he looked at her, what he was thinking.

“Let me braid your hair before you go to bed.”

“Okay.” She said quietly and began to slip off his lap.

Steve went to move but Max just plopped down into his lap, her back to Billy. Steve was sideways, his back against the open car door, he looked up at Billy.

Billy just looked at them, at Max in his lap and Steve staring up at him. Did he see something as he looked at them together? Did it make him feel anything that Max trusted Steve like this? Steve desperately wanted it to.

Billy seemed to shake out of whatever had a hold on him, grabbing a brush out of the glove compartment and gently starting on Max’s hair. It was quick work – practiced, easy. Took no time at all for Billy to tightly French braid it.

Max looked tired by the end of it, sleepy in Steve’s lap. She stood once Billy was finished, waited for them to stand as well, and dragged them all into a hug.

It felt a little like a huddle, Max between them, arms around both of their waists. She burrowed in, took a few deep breaths, then she pulled away and asked if Billy would pick her up in the morning.

Billy didn’t normally pick her up or drop her off. He hadn’t been back to this house since before Starcourt. Neil certainly didn’t want him here. But Billy nodded, said  _ of course _ , and watched as Max went back to sneak into her window.

Steve kept his gaze on Billy, saw how drained he looked watching her go. He gently pushed Billy into the car once Max was out of view and went around to the drivers side to get them home.

Billy was silent on the drive back, not even one snarky comment about his driving or the Camaro. He just stared out the window distantly, eyes a bit blank. Steve held out his hand, Billy took it without hesitation, twining their fingers together.

He didn’t ask Billy if he was alright until they were back at the apartment, shucking off their shoes. Steve didn’t even know if he was really expecting an answer.

“Are you okay?”

Billy just strode past him, ignoring the question entirely. He went straight to the little deck and lit up a cigarette as he stared out into the night.

Steve wasn’t sure what to do. It was obvious Billy needed a minute, needed to be alone for a moment to collect his thought, but Steve didn’t want to leave him. Couldn’t leave him.

He stood by the door, right where Billy left him, thinking it over. He watched Billy’s fingers clench around the railing, the angry line of his mouth and jaw, the hardness in his eyes.

Billy of yore would’ve shouted, and pushed, and spit petty, vile things until he was left utterly alone. Steve couldn’t let that happen anymore, wouldn’t let it happen. Billy deserved softness and love, he could try to push Steve away, but he had a feeling Billy didn’t really want that at all.

He moved toward the open balcony doors slowly. Billy sucked down the cigarette to the filter, tossing it, but still gripping tightly to the railing. Steve came to stand beside him, shoulder to shoulder. They stood like that for a while, the cool night air fluttering the trees and their hair.

Billy’s face was stony and closed off, but his eyes were alight with sadness. Steve couldn’t help but lift a comforting hand to run across his back and shoulders. He rubbed down along Billy’s bicep, soothing and light. Billy just stepped into Steve’s space after a while, wrapping Steve up in his arms. Billy tucked his face into Steve’s neck, arms tight around him, and breathed in deep.

“I was dead.” Billy whispered.

Steve’s chest hurt  _ so _ badly at the words. “Yeah.”

Billy clutched at him harder. “I was  _ dead _ . And Max… Max  _ dreams _ about that.”

“We all do.” Steve whispered back.

He felt Billy shudder at the words, Steve tightened his arms. They stood like that for a little while, Billy’s hot tears sliding down his neck. Eventually Steve tugged them to his room and back down into bed like they’d been before Max called.

Steve pulled off the hoodie he was wearing and his shorts, grabbing Billy and doing the same before tugging them into bed. Steve wrapped himself around Billy, face smashed into the crook of Billy’s neck, arms wrapped tight, a leg thrown over his hip, pinning Billy to him.

Billy’s hand wound through his hair, his other hand going around Steve’s shoulders and hugging Steve tighter to him. The blanket was pulled over them, the room was dark, it was late, but Steve knew Billy wouldn’t go back to sleep. Not after what Max said.

“Are you alright?” He whispered against Billy’s skin.

Because, Steve Harrington wasn’t good at a lot of things, but he  _ was  _ good at fighting monsters. Even the ones in Billy’s mind.

“I don’t know.” Billy said after a long time.

Steve gently kissed up Billy’s neck, his jaw, his cheek, even his forehead. He kissed over Billy’s warm skin and wet eyes until Billy grabbed him and hauled him down to his lips. He kissed Steve like he needed to be reminded that this was real, like he was trying to wake himself up.

Steve let Billy roll them, settled on top of Billy, between his thighs. He let Billy grip him too tight, kiss deep and intense, let him buck up into the firm pressure of Steve’s hips.

He let Billy do what he wanted. Steve ran his fingers gently over Billy’s face as they kissed, tucked stray curls behind his ears, slowly pressed his hips down.

He was gentle with Billy because he needed it. Because this was about reminding him that he was alive and loved and  _ here _ with Steve.

Billy pressed bruising kisses to his mouth, biting his lips and licking deep, contrasting from the gentle movements of Steve’s hands and body. Billy tore at Steve’s boxers and then his own, kicking them off and pulling Steve between his spread thighs. Hands gripped and traced and kneaded the skin of Steve’s back and ass and thighs, pulling and pushing against Steve’s slow grind and soft touches.

Steve kissed down Billy’s throat, soothing hands tucking loose curls behind his ears. Billy whined, eyes wet, chest heaving. “Please, Steve.”

Steve pulled back just enough to grab the lube, Billy’s hands never leaving his skin. Like he was afraid that if he let go, even an inch, Steve would float away. Steve wasn’t going anywhere, he’d show Billy that.

He slicked his fingers, kissing Billy slowly and gently as he pressed in. Billy gasped into his mouth, hips shifting, attempting to take  _ more _ , to make it  _ harsh _ and  _ real _ . Steve just kept on, fingering Billy slowly and thoroughly. One finger became two, two became three, his strokes deep and long. 

Billy’s eyes were open, staring at Steve through wet eyes as Steve took him apart gently. He was quiet, apart from the gasps and moans he couldn’t suppress, looking up at Steve and gripping at him tightly.

Steve pressed in and Billy’s head tipped back, exposing the long line of his throat. Steve pressed a kiss there as he bottomed out. He stayed like that for a moment, throbbing inside Billy, pressing him gently into the bed, lips kissing from his neck to his cheek. Billy let out a stuttering breath, tears falling across his cheeks and into his hair, holding Steve tightly to him.

Billy sighed when Steve began thrusting slowly, but deeply. Knees pressing into Steve’s sides, arms winding around Steve’s shoulders, clinging to him. Steve sat back, bringing Billy up with him, settling Billy on his lap and embraced all around him.

They both let out a groan at the change in position, Billy sinking further down on Steve’s cock. It was the opposite of frantic, though Billy’s energy still seemed to radiate that type of need. Steve fucked up into Billy as he ground down against Steve, arms wrapped tightly around Steve’s shoulders, Steve’s arms holding Billy’s body flush against him. They were both panting into each other’s mouths, eyes open and staring.

“I’m here.” Steve whispered through a harsh breath. “You’re alive.” Billy whined at a sharp thrust. “I love you so much.”

Billy began to cry in earnest at the words, gripping the back of Steve’s neck and shoulders so hard it hurt. Big, deep sobs racked his chest as he pushed his hips down harder against Steve’s, dick leaking against their stomachs.

“I love you.” Steve whisperer against his skin.

Billy ground down on Steve’s cock and came between them, holding Steve to him, breathing harshly into his hair. Billy stayed like that, curled tightly around him, as Steve fucked up into Billy, sighing out comforting things. 

Steve curled his hand in Billy’s hair, rocking into the tight heat of him as he burrowed into Steve, seeking comfort and clinging to it. Steve whispered in his ear and held him tight until Billy started angling his hips and pressing back on Steve’s heavy cock. 

He let out a ragged breath when Billy pressed a gentle kiss to his neck and came. Shuddering in Billy’s arms, exhaling into his skin. 

Billy pulled them down after a moment so they were lying down. They were still entwined, arms and legs and hands. Steve had a thigh between Billy’s and could feel his come slowly sliding out of Billy and onto him. He should get up to clean Billy, he’ll be cranky about the flaky residue left on his skin when he gets up in a few hours, Steve knows this from experience. But, he doesn’t move. He stays in Billy’s hold, stays exactly where Billy has put him.

They don’t talk. Steve doesn’t know what time it is, only that the sun will rise in a handful of hours, that Billy will get up and pick up Max, that he’ll drive them to school and be away from Steve.

He wishes, not for the first time, that he could see inside Billy’s head. Get a glimpse at what he was thinking, what he saw when he looked at Steve. Billy was quiet. For all his bluster and shit talk and attitude, he was quiet. Steve just so desperately wanted to know.

Billy’s fingers traced over Steve’s skin. A barely there press of fingertips that left goosebumps in their wake. He made constellations out of the freckles and moles that lined Steve’s body, brushed the curve of his collarbone, then his jaw, along his brows and the line of his nose, the shape of his lips.

Those hands had wrecked him once. Made him suffer, brought him pain. Those hands had tried to brutalize him. 

They also are what saved them. Gripped the maw of a monster to protect a little girl.

Those hands had caused so much damage, and yet, traced so softly across his skin. Those hands touched him reverently, like he was precious, like he was valuable.

Steve felt  _ loved _ by their touch. Felt seen.

He closed his eyes as Billy traced his image, committing it to memory. He let himself sink into the feel of those hands on him, gentle and welcome.

“Sometimes,” Billy whispered, jarring Steve from the quiet stillness surrounding them. “I don’t think this is real at all.”

Steve opened his eyes. Billy’s were  _ so _ blue. Blue and bright, even in the darkness.

“Like, maybe they didn’t find me. Maybe I really did die in the mall. And, that was it. This is just… what came after.”

“Why would you think that?” Steve whispered back, brow furrowed at the words.

Billy’s fingers stopped their tracing, palm coming up to cup Steve’s jaw, thumb slowly running over his cheek. “Because…  _ this _ is all I’ve ever wanted. And, I knew I’d never have it, even back in California.” He pulled his hand away to rub at his eyes. “I fucking  _ died _ , Steve. I died a total asshole. I fucked everything up in my life, made everyone hate me. Doing one good thing at the end shouldn’t make up for all that, y’know? I just feel like it’s too good to be true, sometimes.”

Steve felt the stinging in his nose and pressure behind his eyes at Billy’s words. Billy was crying again, but trying desperately to stop it by pressing the heel of his palms into his eyes. Steve gripped Billy’s back a little harder and felt a few tears leak hotly down his own cheeks.

“I don’t know how to convince you that this is real.” He whispered. “I don’t even know if I can. But I fucking  _ love _ you, probably more than I can ever say. I’ve never felt like this before, not about anyone. No one’s ever loved me like you do.”

And then Steve was actually crying – because, wasn’t that the truth? No one had ever loved him like this. Not Nancy, or any of the girls he’d slept with before her, or his so-called friends, and most certainly not his parents. Robin loved him. The kids – they loved him. That was maybe the closest. But, Billy?

Billy  _ loved _ him.

Billy made him feel real, and seen, and known. Billy made him feel more like himself than he’d ever been. 

He hadn’t known that’s what love was supposed to do. Until now.

Billy wrapped his arm around Steve’s shoulders and pulled him flush against his chest, wet cheeks and ragged breath to his neck. Billy gripped the back of his hair and shook as he cried with Steve.

“Please don’t leave me, Steve.”

It was barely even a whisper, so quiet Steve almost didn’t hear it at all. 

“I won’t.”

They laid like that until the sun pushed against the curtains and Billy’s phone alarm went off. Steve laid in the bed, watching Billy grab clothes and head to the shower, listened to him get dressed and do his hair. Steve kissed him goodbye, watching him leave with tired eyes, dressed in Steve’s clothes, like that would bring comfort.

Steve tried to sleep after that. Tossed and struggled until he finally got up and got into Billy’s bed. It was cold and un-slept in, but it smelled like Billy. Steve hugged a pillow and closed his eyes.

——

Billy started going to therapy a bit more frequently after the night Max called crying.

They didn’t really talk about it. About that night or what was said. But for a few weeks after, Billy was a bit more withdrawn while also much more tactile.

He was always where Steve was, if he could help it, and always touching him. A hand at his back, an arm around his shoulder, their fingers entwined. He was seated next to him on the couch, at the diner, at the movie with the kids, the full length of his side pressed against Steve’s own.

Steve wasn’t really bothered by it. Mostly because he was clingy, everyone knew that, so having Billy cling back was… welcome. 

If he was being honest, Steve needed it too after that night. 

Max, for her part, seemed embarrassed by her behavior. She didn’t come around as often as Steve would’ve expected, though Billy had begun picking her up regularly for school, so maybe she was getting her fill of Billy just without Steve.

He thought maybe she had a lot of things that needed to be resolved as well. It was easy to ignore when Billy was the one in the hospital – broken and freshly revived – but they all had trauma from that summer. Maybe Max needed help working through it, same as the rest of them.

The kids notice something’s up though – because of course they do, the little shits.

Dustin takes to pestering Steve about it. Pulls him aside and gives him looks, texts him long rambling paragraphs about how they’re family and Steve should know better than to hide things from them. When that doesn’t work, they send Will.

Will is uncomfortable, but genuine, when he asks Steve if everything’s alright with him and Billy and Max. Dustin appears beside him with pleading eyes and it’s about all that Steve can take of these two.

He promises them that everything is fine, to stop worrying. Of course they don’t, but they’re his kids and refuse to let a good mystery drop no matter how much Steve wishes they might. 

He tells Billy that night that the kids are asking after him and Max, noticing some shift between them. Billy rolls his eyes and complains that they’re too smart for their own good. He’s right, they are, but it’s nothing they didn’t already know.

Billy cooks the kids a big meal as a way to “control the chaos” as he likes to call it. 

He’s doing a bit better since he upped his therapy. He’s still clinging to Steve, just not as hard. He seems clearer, more focused. Max seems a little better too since she started going with Billy once a week to talk through his death. Neil and Susan don’t know, they think she’s at the Wheeler’s for D&D, and Steve makes sure to pick her up and drop her off exactly on time, every time, so they don’t find out.

So Billy makes dinner and has all the kids come. Joyce, Jonathan, and Hopper too, because they’re at Joyce’s house. Billy and Steve just didn’t have the space in the apartment to cook or host much, and Joyce really doesn’t mind as she reminds them more than  once .

Billy lets the kids help him in the kitchen, teaching them how to make lemon pasta and chicken because it was delicious and easy, according to Billy. They helped and watched and chattered, Billy let them without complaint.

Joyce complimented him on the food, smiling at him as she ate, and Hop went so far as to demand Billy come cook for him and El once a week after this. Billy seemed more relaxed here, surrounded by the kids, in the Byers’ modest kitchen. Steve felt himself settle a little at the sight of Billy’s loose shoulders and gentle eyes as he let Lucas and Mike explain some nerdy thing to him that had been totally lost on Steve.

Max was beside him, El beside her. He felt the pressure as she slowly leaned against his side. Steve was leaned back in his chair, his arm around the back of her’s. He didn’t move as she leaned against him, didn’t stiffen or look down or say anything. He just let her get comfortable and moved his arm from the back of her chair to curl over her shoulders, holding her to him. She exhaled, sinking further into his casual embrace.

He looked up from where he’d been listening to Dustin rant about his recent Math test, to see Billy’s eyes on his. 

Billy’s too-blue gaze was warm as it slid over Steve and Max. It was soft. Ooey-gooey like a fresh baked chocolate chip cookie. Steve felt his heart thump oddly in his chest at the sight. Made him think about… things. 

Future things.

Things for when they were older. That maybe, years from now, they’d be at another gathering like this, everyone a bit more grown up, and instead of Max tucked under his arm, maybe it was their own kid. 

He’d never really thought about kids before. Maybe once or twice in an abstract sort of way while growing up or toward the end there with Nancy he had, but not like this. Not like now, sitting here imagining a little girl with Billy’s hair and eyes and sweetness, tucked to him, surrounded by family.

It was very much too early to be thinking like that, Billy was still in  _ high school _ , Steve was just barely out of school himself, they were young. But, one day, maybe. 

For now, he was content with his kids, with Billy looking at him warmly from across the table. With Jonathan laughing with El and Will. With Joyce and Hop speaking softly to one another as they watched over them.

He hugged Max a little tighter to him and smiled at Billy, heart thumping when Billy smiled back.


	4. you drift through the years

Time was ticking by, moving faster than Steve had even realized.

It was the end of May.

Senior Prom was literally next week. Not long after would be Graduation and then school would be out for summer.

When the fuck had that happened?

Steve hadn’t gone to Prom last year. Well, he’d went to Junior Prom with Nancy, they were very much still in the “pretending” phase of their relationship at that point. But, Senior year everything went to shit and by the end of that year he’d just been so focused on trying to get into college and not crying over Nancy and Jonathan, that he hadn’t gone.

He had no idea if Billy had gone last year to Junior Prom – he must’ve, though. He was Billy Hargrove, who wouldn’t’ve literally begged to go with him?

Steve doubted that he wanted to go this year. Especially since he hadn’t even mentioned it and the date was fast approaching. All those people, dressed up and staring – Steve wasn’t holding his breath, was all.

Billy was curled up in the armchair, fancy leather bound notebook gifted from his therapist open as he scribbled in it. He looked up as Steve entered and shucked off his apron.

“Hey.”

Steve sighed dramatically in return and practically draped himself over Billy in the armchair. Billy, for his part, just rolled his eyes and moved his journal, pulling Steve more snugly against him.

They shouldn’t have fit all that well in the chair considering their heights and wide shoulders, but Steve was clingy and Billy liked to indulge him. So, he sat sideways across Billy’s lap a little like a child, face tucked up into Billy’s neck, arms wrapped around him. Billy just hugged Steve tighter to him, relaxing into Steve’s embrace.

“Long day?”

“Yeah.” Steve groaned.

He opened this morning, which was always his least favorite anyway, but then he’d been scheduled with fucking Bryan – who was kind of the worst. None of the girls liked working with him – well, _no one_ liked working with him, period, but he was gross to the girls. Steve got that, so Keith had put Bryan on shift with Steve because apparently Steve was _nice_ and maybe that’d deter Bryan from being an asshole or something. Spoiler alert: that had very much not been the case.

Because _Bryan_ was an equal opportunity fuckhead, apparently, and heard that Steve was less than straight, which meant that he felt just as comfortable harassing Steve as he did the girls.

Steve honestly had no idea how he’d even found out that he had a boyfriend in the first place? Bryan was older than them, didn’t really know Steve and definitely didn’t know Billy. It wasn’t like the other coworkers talked to him and Steve only really talked about Billy at work when Robin was there or in passing with some of the other’s when they asked about his plans for the weekend or whatever. But, somehow Bryan found out and now he wouldn’t stop flirting with Steve and asking him wildly inappropriate questions for both a workplace and morning – even after Steve had started talking loudly about Billy.

Billy’s hand sunk into Steve’s hair and he let out a soft groan, shifting a little in Billy’s lap to give him a better angle.

“Wanna tell me about it?” Billy asked softly.

He was trying this new thing his therapist had suggested where he asked Steve about his feelings and then shared his own in return. Trying to open up more, and all that. Apparently her goal was to get Billy to talk about Starcourt, about the Mind Flayer, about what had happened to him, to talk to _Steve_ about it specifically.

Because Steve was his _boyfriend_ , his significant other, his support system. Because he hadn’t really said much about it since they moved in together. Steve was fine with whatever Billy wanted, to tell him or not; but he couldn’t say he wasn’t curious to know Billy’s experiences.

“Morning shifts are trash and I hate them.” Billy snorted. “And Keith put me on shift with fucking Bryan.”

“Is that the guy none of the girls wanna work with?”

“Ugh, yeah. Keith should just fire him and be done with it, but he won’t. So I got stuck with him.” Steve shifted so his head rested against the arm of the chair and his knees over the other side. Billy’s hand still stroked softly through his hair. “Surprise, he’s apparently just as gross to anyone who wants to suck dick, not just girls.”

Billy’s eyes narrowed, “In a bullying way or in a sexual harassment kind of way.”

“Harassment, definitely.” Steve shrugged, brushing it off. “I’ve never actually been hit on by a dude before. Too bad Bryan sucks.”

Billy’s face immediately looked offended and a little pissed. “What are you talking about – I used to hit on you constantly.”

Steve squinted up at him, “Uh, _when_?”

Billy aggressively rolled his eyes. “Literally all the time. Practically every time I spoke to you before we fought and even after that.”

“Are you kidding me?” He shook his head. in exasperation. “That was _so_ not flirting, that was borderline bullying.”

“Excuse me for being a closet case with rage issues and a father like Neil.” Billy rolled his eyes again. “You were straight, and kind of a dick, and so pretty I wanted to punch you. Sorry if my flirting wasn’t up to your standards, your highness.”

Steve tweaked Billy’s nipple through his shirt, ignoring the little yelp he gave or the hand tightening in his hair. “You little shit, I didn’t even know you _were_ flirting is the point I’m trying to make!”

“Oh, okay, guess it was just real casual guy-stuff when I practically came onto you in the showers after practice. Or when I would literally grind up on you during basketball? Real heterosexual shit, definitely.”

“Okay.” Steve waved a hand. “When you put it like that, now _knowing_ that you liked me, sure. But when it was happening? How was I supposed to know that you weren’t just being an asshole?”

“I literally called you _Pretty_ _Boy_ since the first day I met you.” Billy glared at him in mock disgust. “Robin’s right, you are a bad bisexual.”

Steve sighed dramatically. “Yes, I know, of this I am very aware.” He shifted so Billy could reach more of his hair. “Besides, it’s not like you knew that I liked you either.”

“Yeah, but you weren’t actively hitting on me.”

“No, but I asked you to help me with all those applications.”

Billy snorted, “Because Wheeler was sick of your shit.”

Steve leveled him with a look. “You really think _Nancy_ was refusing to help me with _schoolwork_? Come on.”

Billy’s brow furrowed all cute and confused. “So, you… what? Just wanted my help instead?”

“I wanted to spend time with you, see if you were really sorry about the fight, if you were as much of a giant asshole as I’d thought.” He shrugged. “I also gave you like, _way_ too many free samples of ice cream. That should’ve tipped you off right there.”

“Yeah, me and hordes of eleven year olds that always seem to find you.”

Steve rolled his eyes, “Erica doesn’t count. You counted, dingbat.”

Billy smirked softly and leaned down to press a kiss to Steve’s lips. “If you say so, pretty boy.”

——

The next day, Steve was on morning shift again with _Bryan_. It sucked, Steve was tired and very much not meant to wake up early like this, and Bryan was only making it worse.

“So, _Steve_.” Ugh, he hated the way Bryan said even his name like it was a come-on. “I got this new brand of underwear – most comfortable thing ever, dude. I swear, it’s been hell trying to find a comfortable pair that’s also… you know, friendly of the _well endowed_.” Bryan literally winked and Steve wanted to punch him in the face.

It was eight-thirty, the rush having momentarily died down enough for Bryan to even have this type of conversation. Steve had never been so happy to hear the bell ring above the door as he was at that moment. He turned away from where he’d been openly grimacing at Bryan, mouth forming his customer-smile, but a real one busted out as Billy sidled up to the counter.

“Hey.” Steve smiled wide, voice dropping all lovey and sighing.

Billy smiled back, hair pulled up in a messy bun, curls all wild and sweat-drenched around his face. He’d just come from a run, athletic shorts clinging to his thick thighs, tight workout long sleeved shirt practically moulded to his body. He looked _good_. Well, he always looked good to Steve, but there was just something about a sweaty, fit Billy that _got_ him. It probably had everything to do with their sexual tension on the basketball court, Steve could admit that now.

Billy leaned forward against the counter top, bringing his smirking face closer to Steve’s. “Hey, pretty boy.”

They just stood there smiling at one another for a few moments, letting their eyes roam. Then _Bryan_ had to go and yuck it all up by talking.

“Hi, are you actually going to order anything or are you just going to harass the workers?”

Billy tilted his head toward where Bryan was standing beside Steve and smirked a little cruelly, looking exactly like he had at Tina’s Halloween party. Steve almost wanted to tell him not to bother, but Bryan was annoying and Billy looked like he was in the mood where he wouldn’t listen anyway.

“You know, that’s funny considering I’ve been hearing that _you’re_ the one harassing _my_ boyfriend.”

Steve felt a little _zing_ go through him at the words. It was the first time Billy had called Steve his boyfriend out loud to someone not in their tribe. And here he was, _claiming_ Steve at eight thirty in the morning in front of the world’s worst fuckboy. Steve was a little bit swooning.

Bryan looked at Billy with confusion, then to Steve, who was still leaning toward Billy from behind the counter with a shit-eating grin, and then back to Billy, who was smirking at him with a shark-like smile.

“Wait, _you’re_ Steve’s boyfriend?”

“Yeah,” Steve nodded. “I told you about Billy, remember?”

The asshole had tuned Steve out as soon as he’d mentioned his boyfriend was texting him and focused solely on the fact that Steve was also into dick and how he could get Steve to suck his.

“What,” Billy righted himself and looked up at Bryan in a way that somehow made him seem taller than whoever he was looking at. Steve had been one the receiving end of that look more than once in the almost two years Billy had been in Hawkins. “You thought someone as pretty as Stevie here would be single?” He snorted meanly.

“No – I – it’s just,” Bryan stumbled over himself under Billy’s hard stare. “You’re _hot_!” He yelled instead.

“Thank you.” Billy said brightly, then instantly turning hard and dark as leaned subtly over the counter toward Bryan. “Stop harassing my boyfriend.”

Bryan gasped and Steve smiled. “I’m taking a five – you’re good, yeah?”

Without waiting for his answer, Steve gestured for Billy to follow him into the back. He tugged Billy’s arm and lead him through the back room and out the door, letting it slam closed behind them.

Steve laughed as he walked Billy back until he was pressed up against the side of the building, kissing him gently as he smiled.

Billy just wrapped his arms around Steve, hauling him in closer to Billy’s sweaty body. Kissing him through the giggles, licking under his teeth.

“Thanks for that.” Steve smirked, hands at Billy’s hips. “Possessive boyfriend is a good look on you.”

Billy rolled his eyes, “He’s an asshole and he needs to stop hitting on you.”

“What’re you jealous or something?” Steve snarked, pressing kisses to Billy’s lips and jaw and throat. “Bryan’s not really my type.”

“Oh yeah?” Billy’s grip on Steve’s hips tightened. “And what’s your type, pretty boy?”

Steve hummed against Billy’s skin. “Oh, you know, former bad boy jocks who get _real_ sweet for me.” He licked up Billy’s neck and bit beneath the bolt of his jaw. “Ring any bells?”

Billy spasmed a little, his skin getting all shivery and bumpy. “I think I know a guy.” Billy whispered a little, gripping Steve’s jaw lightly and guiding his mouth to his.

They made out against the back wall for a while, Steve’s hips cradled between Billy’s spread thighs. Hands gently pressing into skin. Eventually Steve pulled back, checking the time on his phone.

“I gotta go.”

Billy leaned in for one last kiss. “I’ll see you later.”

Steve smiled, “Yeah, you will.”

He went back to work with a smile on his face, ignoring Bryan’s eyes and wayward comments. A couple hours later, Robin clocked in and they ignored Bryan together until it was time for him to clock out.

“So,” Robin started once Bryan was gone for the day. “Have you talked to Billy about prom?”

Steve just rose a brow as he finished an order and handed it to the woman waiting. “Uh, was I suppose to?”

Robin rolled her eyes and continued her casual lean against the counter, the same way she’d done at Scoops. “I mean, it’s next week?”

“Okay?” Steve asked.

Robin sighed dramatically. “You two are the worst sometimes.” She pulled out her phone and began rapid fire texting.

Steve just ignored her, waiting to see the kids and to clock out. Britta should be in soon for her shift meaning Steve only had a little while longer before he could go make out with Billy some more.

Billy – with his firm hands and gentle eyes and perfect fucking lips. Ugh, it was obnoxious how pretty he was. Steve thought after being with him for a while the starry-eyed look Steve had would fade. But it hadn’t. His heart still rabbited in his chest when Billy looked at him all soft and sweet, his dick still kicked at the very thought of Billy’s body and voice, he still thought he was ridiculously beautiful.

Max and Will ambled in, chattering over something on Will’s phone, and that was an interesting combination. Sometimes the kids came in pairs or small groups, but this wasn’t one Steve saw all that often.

Max was usually either with Lucas or El, sometimes Dustin if he could wear her down enough. Will was always with Mike or El, sometimes Lucas, sometimes Dustin.

“Hey guys.” Steve smiled from the counter.

“Hey Steve.” They made their way to him, staring at the menu above.

“Where’s the rest of the crew?” He asked easily as they looked.

Max shrugged carelessly, leaning a little against Will’s taller frame. “Who knows.”

Will rolled his eyes a little, but a smile on his face at her abrasiveness. “Mike and Lucas went to see a movie without us and Dustin is helping El with her homework.”

Before Steve could respond, Max was pointing at some sandwich on the menu but making it more complicated – as was the Hargrove-Mayfield way. Will asked for something easier and their usual frappes, smiling as they went to sit by the window.

It was interesting to watch them together, seeing as they were so different. Max was all aggressive eye rolls and crossed arms and _dump his ass_ energy. Where Will was so much softer - shy smiles, easy eyes, and open approachable posture. Whatever they were talking about had Will blushing.

“Ugh, he’s _such_ an idiot. I don’t even understand why you like him. You could do literally a thousand times better than fucking _Mike_.” Steve heard as he walked over with their food.

“Yeah,” Will said shyly. “But I do like him and he’s not an idiot _all_ the time, just… most of the time.”

“Here you go.” Steve smiled easily, very much pretending he hadn’t heard a word.

“Thanks, Steve.” Max smiled up at him.

He couldn’t resist putting an arm around her shoulders for a moment, especially not when she leaned against his hip the way she did. He smiled down at Will, who had mostly stopped permanently blushing in his presence. They were all just sort of pretending that never happened, and Steve was _fine_ with that.

“How you dipshits doing?”

Max shrugged under his arm. “Fine. Ready for school to be over.”

“Yeah,” Will agreed. “I’m ready for summer.”

“I feel ya.” Steve nodded. “I’m done in a few, but Billy and I will be home if you want to come up after.”

Will blushed and looked down at his drink and Max just rolled her eyes. “Sounds good, Steve.”

He smirked as he patted Max’s head gently, soothingly, like he would if he had his own little sister. He caught a little more of their conversation as he walked back behind the counter.

He could hear Max scoff, “ _Ugh_ , are you ever going to get over it?”

“I’m _gay_ , Max.” Steve could practically hear the blush in Will’s trembly voice. “And, I’m sorry, but your brother is attractive and so is Steve. Seeing them together like _that_ isn’t something I’m just going to like, forget about!”

Max groaned, “I _so_ don’t want to think about Billy _or_ Steve like that. Yuck. Hey, does Mike ever like, _talk_ about it? I’m pretty sure he had a boner – _ow!_ ”

He rounded the corner of the counter in time to see Will punch Max in the arm. “Shut up!” Face red and eyes wide.

Max just cackled as she rubbed her arm, the little hobgoblin. Steve shook his head as he went back to being interrogated by Robin about prom.

“Are _you_ going to prom?” He asked as he made a few coffees.

“Well, that’s why I want to know what you’re doing.”

He rolled his eyes with a smirk. “What, couldn’t con any _gleeks_ to go with you?”

“I’ll have you know that the musical theatre kids and the band kids have a very good relationship.”

“Uh huh, I’m sure they do.”

“Maybe I just wanted you to come with me.” She said breezily, like that may have once been an option before she took it away for him being so stupid.

“Aw, Robs.” He smiled brightly, bumping shoulders with her. “I’d totally go to prom with you!”

She rolled her eyes, “You have a boyfriend, dingus. You may have been my date in my head, but then you and Billy had to be _in love_ or whatever and now I am dateless.”

“Why don’t you ask Billy to go with you?”

It was an idea. Billy and Robin were friends, they were in the same grade, they both loved Steve – perfect match in Steve’s book. Robin sent him a side-eye look.

“Because Billy’s your boyfriend, not mine?” She said it with a distinct _duh_ in her tone. “And, if he even wants to endure ridiculous, antiquated, mating call that is Prom – he’d go with you, the person he loves and let’s touch him freely.”

“Yeah, but he would probably go with you if you asked him.” Steve reasoned. “You’re his other best friend, if you needed him he’d be there.”

Robin pouted a little as she leaned on the counter.

“You know that look is not as cute as you think it is.” He looked down at her and her blue eyes – different from Billy’s rolling waves or Max’s clear summer skies, from Nancy’s icy frozen depths – and sighed. “Fine, I’ll see what he wants to do and get back to you.”

Robin smiled and thanked him easily. That was the thing about Robin, everything was always easy. Work at an ice cream shop with former high school jerk? Sure. Help former high school jerk and nerdy teen break a Russian code? No sweat. Get kidnapped and tortured by said Russians? Cool. Become former high school jerk’s best friend? Easy.

Steve clocked out and waved at the kids before heading upstairs. Billy was seated at the desk in his room, typing up some paper for class. Steve threw himself down on Billy’s bed, cuddling into it a bit.

“Hey.” Billy said warmly over his shoulder.

Steve hummed in response, eyes sliding over Billy’s bare shoulders as he typed away. His hair was piled up on the top of his head in a sloppy, curly jumble that couldn’t really even be called a bun. Steve’s gaze traced the scars over his back, healing but still a vivid reminder of what had happened. It was almost a year – how wild was that?

But Billy was alive, doing schoolwork, in their apartment. Steve rolled over on the bed, attempting to sooth the uncomfortableness in his chest.

“Max and Will are downstairs. I told them they could come up if they wanted.”

“That’s fine.” Billy said, a little distractedly.

“Also, Robin wants to know if you’re going to prom.”

That seemed to get his attention. Billy’s fingers stopped typing and he turned in his chair to look at Steve. “Prom?”

“Yeah.” Steve rolled onto his stomach, hugging a pillow under his chin. “Prom is next week, Robin wants to know if you’d wanna go.”

“To prom.” Billy’s brows pinched.

“Yes.” Steve said again.

Billy paused to think about it, looking somewhere near the ground. Steve waited, raising a brow as he watched Billy deliberate. Instead of answering, Billy just hummed and turned back to his paper.

“Okay, guess I’ll take that as a no.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“So, you want to go?”

“I didn’t say that either.”

Steve groaned a little. “You’re so frustrating.”

“You should know that by now.”

Steve snorted at Billy’s reply and hauled himself up, coming to drape himself across Billy’s shoulders as he typed.

“I’m gonna get changed in case the kids come up.” He squeezed Billy in a small hug. “How much more do you have?”

Billy shrugged easily in Steve’s hold. “Some, not a lot. I should be done in a little while.”

“Okay.” Steve pulled back and went into his own room to change out of his work clothes.

He slid into basketball shorts and a loose tank top, ignoring his messy hair. It was warm because Billy had the balcony doors open and the air off, so Steve went to the freezer and ate ice cream from the carton.

The tv was on in the living room, playing some Hulu show that they didn’t have to really pay attention to. Steve leaned against the island watching absently as he ate his ice cream.

An obnoxious knock on the door signaled Max’s arrival. She’d been _sarcastically_ knocking since the _“incident”_. Steve moved to let them in.

“Hello.” Steve said warmly with a smile.

Max shouldered her way in, Will rolling his eyes gently at Max’s aggression. “Where’s Billy?”

“In here, shitbird.” Billy called from his room.

“What is he doing?” Max demanded as she flopped down into her armchair.

“Finishing homework.” Steve said as Will sat down on the couch. “You guys want ice cream?”

They called out their _hell_ _yes_ ’s and Steve made up their bowls like the good little babysitter he was. He sat next to Will on the couch and handed Max the remote to put on whatever she wanted.

They ate ice cream and talked shit, Steve liked the dynamic between Max and Will, he was finding. Will was less withdrawn in her sole presence, more likely to speak up or roll his eyes or laugh loudly. When it was just the two of them, Will seemed more himself, or more like the Will he wanted to be instead of the one everyone was used to. Max, for her part, was nice to Will in her own way. Not the coddling protectiveness that some of the other Party adopted around Will, but she was a bit softer when she felt like he needed it. They sort of evened each other out, Steve was finding.

Eventually Billy came to join them – fully dressed, Steve noted – slinking in and plopping down beside Steve. He greeted the kids easily, stole what was left of Steve’s melted ice cream, and surface-complained about what Max and Will had chosen to watch. The kids booed him and fought for their show, going on about plot lines and character development while Billy just pretended to fall asleep.

Robin came up after her shift and they cooked dinner. The kids helping when Billy told them to, watching and nodding at his instructions as he taught them how to make what they were having.

That was something Steve loved about Billy. He always took the time to explain to the kids how to make something, or fix something, or deal with something. Steve wondered if it was because his own father hadn’t ever really taken the time with him, Steve wouldn’t be surprised if that was the case.

Max and Will were pretty obedient when Billy got into teacher-mode. They followed him around like ducklings, doing as he said and asking questions when they didn’t understand something. Robin snarked here and there as she helped prepare her own part of the meal, Steve just pulled out plates and bowls and utensils, watching as they all moved around each other like a well-oiled machine. Like a family.

He really needed to talk with Billy about what he wanted to do after graduation, Nancy’s question still ringing in his ears. But, he could hold off a little longer. Pretend for a while. That they could have this forever.

——

It was Thursday, which meant it was Dustin Day.

Dustin had whined a while back about not being Steve’s favorite anymore – which was slander and untrue – and asked Steve if they could maybe hang out alone like they use to.

It made Steve a little sad that Dustin thought Steve wouldn’t want to spend time with him, as silly as it was. He loved Dustin. The kid was both a little brother and a best friend. They were both only children, Steve knew just how lonely that could be. So, Thursdays had become Dustin Day – Steve would pick him up from school and they’d go off an do something alone.

Usually it involved dinner and some type of activity. Movies, bowling, one memorable attempt at ice skating.

Steve was in the school parking lot, leaning against the side of the Camaro, making out with Billy as they waited for the kids to come out. Everyone knew Thursdays had become Dustin Day and Billy liked to get particularly handsy in the parking lot knowing that Steve was going to be gone. Steve really didn’t mind.

Billy had him pressed against the warm metal, hands literally tucked into the back pockets of his jeans to haul him closer as Billy licked into Steve’s mouth. It made small shivers pass through his body and Billy smirked, knowing that. Steve just tugged a little at Billy’s hair in retaliation.

“Ugh, please, just stop.” Max groaned. “I don’t need a constant reminder of the worst day of my life, thanks.”

Billy pulled back from Steve’s mouth just enough to scowl and glare at his sister. “Fuck off, Maxine.”

Max glared at him from over the roof of the car and slid into the passenger seat without even letting Lucas, Mike, or Will get in first. The boys started whining loudly and banging on the window for her to let them in, and Dustin started laughing, and Billy sighed, dropping his head to Steve’s neck.

Steve chuckled and pressed a kiss to Billy’s cheek. “Guess that’s our cue.”

Billy huffed but pulled back, Robin running over in time to tell the kids to can it and kick Max out of the front seat so the boys could climb in.

“Have fun on your dork date!” Robin smiled as she pushed Max into the back seat as well and slid into the passenger seat of the Camaro.

“Later, Buckley.” Steve smirked as he pulled himself from Billy’s grabby hands. “Let’s go, Dustin!”

“Oh, Steve, I have so much to tell you about.” Dustin smiled a little wildly as he jumped into Steve’s car.

“Bye.” Steve said softly, leaning in to kiss Billy gently, but quickly. “I’ll see you later.”

“Have fun.” Billy snorted, a mean little smirk appearing.

Steve rolled his eyes. “Good luck with the Brat Pack.”

He slid into his own car, Dustin immediately launching into a story about how some girl in their grade airdropped nudes to someone during lunch.

“You’re joking.” Steve said, a little disgusted and a little impressed by the balls on the girl.

“I am not.” Dustin went on, gleefully. “But that’s not even the best part of the story!”

“Oh, god. Okay.”

“So she airdropped them to Jordan – who immediately sends it this group chat with a bunch of his friends.”

“Naturally.” Steve sighed at the immaturity of teenage boys.

“So I’m _in_ this group chat, Steve. And I look at my phone during Math and literally almost shit myself because Natalie is just… really absolutely gorgeous, okay? So I find Jordan in between classes and I’m like, _what the fuck?_ You know? The group chat is _blowing_ up, and Jordan thinks this is wild and hilarious as he tells me how this went down in lunch. And it’s then, Steve,” He says for dramatic effect. “It’s then I realize who this naked girl is, that it’s Natalie, because her face is not in this photo. And do you know who’s in this group chat, Steve? Do you know who is commenting on this naked girl’s photo with multiple _fire_ emojis and talking about some very nasty shit he’d do to this girl? _Her brother_ , Steve. Natalie’s fucking _brother_.”

“Come on.” Steve says as Dustin starts howling with laughter. “You’re fucking with me. There’s no fucking way.”

“Steve,” Dusting manages, wiping away actual tears from his eyes. “Steve, I shit you not. I was _dying_. Like, I actually really thought I was going to pass-out I was laughing so hard.”

“Did you tell the others yet?” Steve asked as they headed to the diner.

“Oh yeah, they know. Lucas was actually also in the group chat, which is probably why Max is mad – because he saw the picture of Natalie. Mike is pissed that he’s not cool enough to be in Jordan’s group chat in the first place.”

Steve eyed Dustin a bit intensely as they parked the car. “Do you still have that picture, Dustin.”

Dustin rolled his eyes. “No, I deleted it. I’m not a monster, Steve. Natalie sent that to Jordan, not to us. It’d be a dick move to keep it without her knowledge or permission.”

Steve reached out and tousled Dustin’s curls in the way he hated, but also secretly loved. “Proud of you.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Dustin shrugged Steve off and got out of the car.

They went in, grabbed a booth in the back, made small talk with the waitresses that were use to seeing them, and ordered way too much food. Milkshakes and burgers and slices of cake and french fries and mozzarella sticks littered the table. Nadine was refilling their sodas when Dustin leaned back in the sticky vinyl and looked at him.

“Are you leaving?”

“Huh?” Steve asked, dipping a french fry into his milkshake and popping it into his mouth.

“Are you leaving.” Dustin asked again. “After Billy and Robin are done with school.”

It was a suddenly serious question from their otherwise lighthearted and playful banter. Steve dragged his eyes away from Dustin’s to look at everything on their table. “I don’t know.”

Nadine returned with their sodas, interrupting Steve’s thoughts. He smiled at her, she’d been three-four years ahead of him in school, but he’d always remembered her and her smile.

“Do you really not know, or are you just saying that so I won’t cry.”

Steve rolled his eyes, but not meanly. “I really don’t know.”

Dustin looked at him for a moment, pushing a waffle fry around his plate, dragging this through ketchup mindlessly. “Okay.”

“What would make you ask that?”

Dustin shrugged, pulling his gaze away from Steve’s questioning one. “I don’t know, Billy and Robin are basically done with school and we just figured that they probably wouldn’t want to stick around here – especially Billy. And you love Billy, so, you’d go with them.”

Steve traced the sadness lining the edges of Dustin’s voice, around his eyes and mouth, the slight slump of his shoulders. Had they discussed this? Had the Party gotten together and talked about how Steve – and Billy and Robin and eventually Jonathan – would leave them?

“We?”

Dustin seemed to get what he was asking. “Max said all Billy’s ever wanted was to go back to California. To go _home_.” He sighed and looked down at his hands wrapped around a milkshake. “We know you wouldn’t leave him, Steve, not now. Which means, you’ll have to leave us.”

An overwhelming sense of _sadness_ gently covered Steve like a blanket. He really hadn’t thought about this, about any of it, but apparently the kids had.

“Dustin.” Steve reached across the table and wrapped his hands over Dustin’s gripping the milkshake glass. He waited until Dustin’s eyes rose to meet his. “I have no idea what we’re gonna do. We haven’t even talked about it yet. But I promise you, if we do leave, it’s not me leaving _you_.”

Dustin’s eyes got a little glassy, but not wet, which was good. Steve hated to see them cry. He nodded at the words and Steve nodded back, releasing his hands.

“I get that, I really do. We all do! I just… wanted to know. From you.”

“I promise you’ll be the first person I tell once I get my life together.”

That earned a snort-laugh from Dustin and just like that, they were back on track.

They finished their spread of diner food, Steve paid, and they headed to the movies. The Hawk in town was newly redone, playing old movies in the majority and one box office hit in rotation. Steve let Dustin get a large ass popcorn and soda for them to share and some candy for their double feature.

_Indiana Jones_ was first. They laughed and talked through the movie, throwing popcorn at each other and the screen. Steve fell asleep during the new movie – some spy thriller with that blonde chick Dustin was in love with. He ended up jumping awake during an explosion and spilling the popcorn, which made Dustin laugh hysterically in the Snap he’d been taking and immediately sent to everyone in their group.

After, they went to Dustin’s and Steve let him beat his ass at video games until Claudia came home.

Steve hugged Dustin on the doorstep when it was time to leave.

“Thanks for another great Best Buddy Day.”

Steve laughed, rustling Dustin’s hair. “Anytime, pal.”

When Steve got home and found Billy in the shower, he just stripped off his clothes and hopped in. The room was warm and steamy, goosebumps prickled at his skin as he slid behind Billy, wrapping his arms around Billy’s slick waist.

“Hey.” He said quietly, pulling Billy back so he rested against Steve’s chest.

Billy leaned back further into Steve’s arms, walking them forward into the warm spray. “Hey, how was the dork date?”

Steve snorted at Billy’s sleepy voice and pressed a kiss against the warm wet skin of his shoulder. “Good. We went to the movies. How was work?”

“Fine.” Billy yawned, turning around in Steve’s embrace and snuggling into his chest.

Steve traced the water down his back, holding Billy firmly to him. Billy’s face pressed against his neck and every so often he’d let his lips trail over Steve’s throat without moving. He could feel Billy’s interested dick against his thigh, his own dick pressed against Billy, but there was no rush to reach down. Steve just felt comfortable, surrounded by Billy and the warm water, a small steamy cocoon.

“You know,” Steve started quietly. “Dustin asked if I was leaving.”

“Leaving?” Billy didn’t move from his spot, the words murmured against wet skin.

“With you and Robin, after you graduate.” It was quiet, the running water loud in his ears. Billy said nothing, but didn’t tense in his arms. “We haven’t actually talked about what you wanna do after. If you want to stay here, if you want to leave, if you want to go to college.”

Billy’s arms tightened around Steve’s ribs and back, he sighed. “I haven’t really thought about it, to be honest.”

“Okay.” Steve said simply. “We can figure it out.”

They stayed like that for a little while longer, until Steve pulled away to wash his hair. Billy plastered himself against Steve’s back and ran soapy hands over Steve’s torso.

“We can talk about it.” Billy said after some time. “I’ll think about it and we can talk about it.”

Steve shrugged easily, not wanting to push Billy. “Sounds good.”

They finished up in the shower, fought over the “good” towel, and fell into Billy’s bed after throwing on pajamas. Steve curled up against Billy, the small tv on the bookshelf playing some cooking competition show, Billy’s fingers tangling in Steve’s wet hair.

“Hey pretty boy,” Billy murmured, pulling Steve’s attention from the tv. “You going to prom with me, or what?”

“Seriously?” Steve chuckled, a zing of excitement coursing through him.

Billy shrugged, “Why the fuck not? Jonny said you didn’t go last year, because of everything. Robin wants to go. I’m not stuck under Neil’s thumb anymore… so, why the fuck not, right?”

Steve moved so he was practically straddling Billy, and kissed him gently. Fingers running over his face, committing each feature to memory.

“I love you.”

“I know.” Billy smiled. “I love you too.”

“Guess we’re going to prom.” Steve smirked.

“Guess we are.

“Do you even have something to wear? Prom is literally in two days.”

Billy sighed, “No.”

“I’ll call Robin tomorrow, maybe we can go after school.”

“Is it too late to pretend I don’t want to dance with you?” Billy asked stubbornly.

Steve leaned down and kissed him sweetly. “Yeah, definitely is.”

——

Steve, Robin, and Billy all shuffled out of the car and stared at the small venue that held their prom.

It was definitely used for weddings and big parties regularly – the faux elegant décor screaming Midwestern decadence – and everyone managed to look exactly how they thought Steve expected they would. At least it wasn’t in the gym like Homecoming.

Steve and Billy managed to find a rental store with options still available last minute and got Billy a tux. Steve had driven to his parents house to grab the one he’d never used out of the back of his closet. His room was practically untouched from when he’d moved out – which really wasn’t surprising, seeing how his parents were never home.

Robin was in a black dress that made her look a little like Morticia Addams, but that was probably intentional, and a boutonnière pinned to the front of her high-necked gown. Steve was wearing her corsage.

They ended up at a table of Robin’s band friends and when they started singing along to some musical Billy looked a little like he wanted to die, so Steve pulled him over to get their photo taken.

They were not the only same-sex couple at prom, but Billy still seemed a little tense when someone stared at them. Steve just smoothed a hand down his arm until he could entwine their fingers together while they waited on the line. “It’s fine.” He whispered. “They’re just staring because they can’t remember if I actually graduated or not.”

Billy rolled his eyes but squeezed Steve’s hand in his. “No, they’re staring because your ass looks fucking ridiculous in those pants.”

Steve turned to try and look at his own ass, “It does not.”

“Yeah, it does.” Billy smirked, leaning in to whisper in Steve’s ear. “You gonna put out on prom night, baby? Gonna let me ride that ass?”

“Jesus Christ.” Steve shoved Billy away from him with a laugh. “Can you stop trying to get me hard right before we take pictures?”

Billy smiled in that sharp-toothed way of his that made him look all predatory and dangerous. “What if that’s what I want pictures of?”

Steve rolled his eyes, “Then you can take your own later. I don’t need anymore rumors about me than there already are.”

“Oh, I know all about those now.” They shuffled up the line, Billy’s hand still in his.

“I keep forgetting that you conned Jonathan into spilling my secrets.”

“Are they secrets if everyone knows about them?” Billy question jokingly.

“Half of that shit isn’t even true, you know.” Steve pouted.

“Yeah,” Billy smiled. “But I’m interested in the half that is.”

Steve just rolled his eyes and the photographer gestured for them to step up. Neither of them had really thought about this and just sort of stared at each other for a moment before Robin ran over to slide between them.

They took a few shots of her with her arms around their shoulders, a few in a traditional prom-pose – Billy with his arms around Robin’s waist, who in turn had her arms around Steve’s waist, who had his hands over hers – and a few of just Steve and Billy. Steve threw his arm around Billy’s shoulder, their sides tight against each other, and Billy’s arm slung easily around his waist.

They ate, they watched Robin reenact crazy antics with her other friends, they sent Snaps to the kids, they danced.

Steve had been worried that Billy wouldn’t want to dance with him – mostly because Billy wasn’t much for making a spectacle of himself anymore. But, slow music played and Steve hauled Billy up before he could protest. They fit together easily, as they always did, and whispered and laughed while they swayed with all the other gushy teens. When the tempo changed to something more upbeat Robin joined them and they shouted along with the music and bopped til they dropped.

Overall, it hadn’t been the worst.

Steve was sort of even glad he hadn’t gone last year. Getting to go with Billy and Robin had been everything he’d ever wanted from the whole _prom experience_.

They left prom earlier than their peers and headed to get ice cream. There were several post-prom parties that even sort of socially outcasted Robin and Billy were invited to, but they made it clear that was practically the last place they’d want to be. Instead, they went back to the apartment and got drunk.

Robin was passed out in Steve’s bed – her black gown replaced with basketball shorts and an oversized hoodie and Steve couldn’t help but think she looked more herself in Steve’s hand-me-downs.

Billy hauled Steve into his room by the belt looped around his hips, closing the door quietly and pushing Steve up against it. He kissed Steve, biting his mouth, pressing him into the door. He tasted like the ice cream they’d been eating and the liquor they’d drank.

Steve felt good, not drunk, not fuzzy or blurry or tired. Billy’s gaze was bright and hot and loose, his hands firm where they gripped Steve through his clothes.

“Thought about this, huh?” Steve said playfully as Billy ripped open his belt and began to pull it off him.

“What – about getting you out of this suit?” He leaned in, licking and nipping up Steve’s throat to his ear. “Or you and me sneaking around after a school event?” He kissed right beneath the bolt of Steve’s jaw. “Cause I’ve thought about a lot of things, pretty boy.”

Steve shivered at the image his mind created. Of him and Billy getting into it at prom all heated, like they had a school a year or two ago, sneaking around all angry and pent-up, turning that aggression into something else entirely.

“Didn’t you say something about riding my ass earlier?” Steve asked a bit breathless as he began unbuttoning Billy’s shirt and pushing it off his shoulders.

“You know, I think I did.” Billy smiled sharply.

Billy slowly and carefully unbuttoned Steve’s dress shirt, slid it off his shoulders gently. He moved to Steve’s dress-pants, now free of the belt, and worked them down, underwear along with it. Billy peppered small kisses across Steve’s collarbones and the dip of his throat.

Steve pulled at Billy’s until they went pooling around his own ankles, pressing into Billy’s embrace and wrapping his arms around warm skin.

“Come on.” Steve whispered as he walked Billy backwards to the bed, stepping carelessly over their clothes.

Billy let Steve pin him to the bed, crawl over him, sliding warm skin and eager hands and filling cocks over one another. But Steve knew Billy would flip him when he wanted, because Billy was going to _ride his ass_ , had practically promised to, and Steve could not wait.

Steve gently kissed down the scars along Billy’s chest. The swirling knot of torn muscle and skin from where the monster had speared him. The fact that he was still alive was a miracle. The fact that he was healed and whole and naked under Steve was another one entirely.

“I love you.” Steve whispered into his skin.

Billy shuddered and Steve moved his lips lower and lower until he could lick across the head of Billy’s flushed cock.

“ _Fuck_ , Stevie.”

Steve let the head rest on his tongue, looking up at Billy best he could to catch his expression. Billy always tried to stifle himself – a leftover from Neil, Steve was sure – but in moments like these, when he was bare and cracked open with pleasure, well, those were Steve’s favorites.

Billy was propped up on his forearms, like he meant to watch as Steve downed his cock like a shot of vodka, but got caught up in the feel of it. Head thrown back, eyes closed, red lips open as he panted.

Steve pressed down, taking more of Billy’s cock into his mouth, lips stretched wide around the girth. Billy groaned when Steve ran his tongue along the underside of the shaft as he bobbed his head.

He hadn’t sucked a cock before Billy, and Steve had never been called anything close to a quick-study, but since they started dating Steve had to say he’d gotten the hang of it.

Billy trembled as Steve did the thing with his tongue that Billy taught him and sighed with pleasure. Steve gripped the base of Billy’s throbbing cock and popped off, heaving a little. Sucking dick was no joke, there should be some kind of Olympic medal for it.

“Fuck, come up here, pretty boy.”

Steve crawled back up Billy’s body, hissing when his aching cock came into contact with Billy’s warm skin. Billy always ran warm, but literally anytime he was aroused or pissed off it was like he turned into a damn furnace.

Billy kissed him roughly, moving them on the bed until Steve’s head hit the pillows. Steve ran a hand through Billy’s hair as he sucked and nipped along Steve’s neck and chest. He reached up and stole a pillow to shove under Steve’s already arching hips.

“ _Billy_.”

“I know, Bambi, I know.”

Billy moved to grab the lube, pouring it over Steve’s red cock and hole and his own fingers. The actual picture of _wet & messy_. He wrapped a large warm hand around Steve’s cock, slick from the lube, and gave a few brutal strokes that had Steve’s hips immediately hitching for more.

Steve was panting a little and Billy hadn’t even really done anything – which, was pretty much just how Billy was in a nutshell.

Billy trailed his slick fingers from Steve’s cock to his wet hole, stroking gently over his entrance while Billy licked at Steve’s nipples. Steve’s breath hitched and Billy chose that moment to sink his finger in. One at first, but then quickly another. Pumping and curling, rubbing absently across Steve’s prostate as he thrusted. Billy added a third and Steve groaned at the stretch and the delicious friction it provided.

Steve couldn’t help but shift his hips in time with Billy’s wrist, the angle changing slightly each time, pulling punched out breaths from Steve’s chest. He wanted more, but Billy wouldn’t give it to him, not yet. Billy liked to take Steve apart slowly when he could, he’d speed up if Steve really asked him to, but Steve sort of liked going slow just as much.

His back arched as Billy began pressing more instantly against his prostate, hips twitching, legs kicking out. “ _Billy_.” He gasped.

Billy speed up a little at the sound of his name falling so breathlessly from Steve’s lips. Thrusting harder on each drag, the pace of his fingers becoming more and more insistent. Steve clutched the sheets and let his head tip back as he tried not to come.

Which, was sort of futile, because if Billy wanted him to come, he’d come.

Billy shifted his fingers, spreading them as he leaned down to lick across Steve’s cock. Steve made some punched out noise that had Billy growling and Billy removed his fingers. Steve felt his empty hole clench around nothing, the sensation still odd after all this time.

“Turn over, Stevie.”

Steve was panting a little, body trembling from the pleasure and the abrupt stop. He looked up at Billy, his brain catching up a little late. He started to roll and Billy gripped his hips to help him flip over. He was on his stomach, the pillow Billy had put under him now lined up perfectly with his dick. Steve couldn’t help but rut into it as Billy slicked himself up behind him.

The touch of Billy’s hands on his lower back stilled his twitching hips. Billy ran his hands over the slight dip at the base of Steve’s back and his ass and his thighs, pressure just firm enough to make Steve sigh.

Billy leaned forward, bracing his hand on the bed up by Steve’s neck, the other guiding the rigid line of his thick cock into Steve’s ass. Steve groaned as the head pushed through, the thick shaft immediately following. Billy moaned high and tight as he bottomed out, breathing harshly through his nose as he shifted his hips against Steve’s ass.

Steve felt good – _so good_. The alcohol they’d drank made him feel warm and loose, Billy made him feel like that too.

He pushed down a little and Billy sort of choked and gripped Steve’s hip harshly, holding him tight. “Come on.” Steve whined.

Billy said nothing as he pulled out and roughly slammed back in, jarring Steve. He moaned loudly at the feeling and spread his legs wider unconsciously, fingers curling into the sheets as Billy started a deep, pounding rhythm.

Steve’s breath was already hitching at Billy’s thrusts, heavy cock rutting into the pillow shoved beneath his hips and sending shivers down his spine.

“Fucking hell, Stevie.” Billy mewled out, hand gripping Steve’s hip harshly, the other still baring his weight up by Steve’s head. He was a scorchingly warm weight over Steve’s back as he fucked into him thoroughly. “Close your legs.”

Steve did as he was told, pushing his thighs together and letting Billy sink into his tightened hole, letting out a whine at the feeling and the sound that erupted from Billy’s chest. He sat up, pulling off of Steve’s back, both hands grabbing and gripping Steve’s hips tightly as he began to speed up his thrusts.

He moaned around a particularly hard stroke that had landed his prostate dead on and Billy couldn’t seem to keep his hands to himself. Billy hauled Steve up, pulling him to lean back against Billy’s too-warm chest, arranging his thighs _wide_ open, practically splitting him in half by sitting Steve on his cock this way.

Steve let out a harsh groan as he sank further and _further_ down on Billy’s thick cock. Billy holding him up, a hand pressed against the bottom of his throat and chest, the other at his hip. He ground against Steve, pulling a deep groan from him at the sensation.

“Jesus christ, Billy.”

Steve’s eyes were closed as he panted. He felt so _full_. Split open and wide. Billy’s heat and skin and scent were surrounding them, lulling Steve as he pressed back into Billy and squeezed around his cock.

“Yeah?” Billy shuddered, hand moving down to Steve’s weeping cock.

“ _Yeah_.” Steve whined, shivering as Billy toyed with his cock.

“I got you, baby.” Billy murmured gently, nuzzling into Steve’s ear.

Billy began stroking with intent and moving his hips to bounce Steve in his lap. Steve just leaned back against Billy’s chest, knowing Billy could take it, could keep them upright. Steve’s arm came up and wrapped back around Billy’s neck, the other finding purchase on Billy’s side.

His skin was slick with sweat, overheated and burn-hot to the touch. Steve let his fingers grip into the new muscle, teasing over fading scars.

Billy was fucking him again, not just the dirty, sinful grind he’d been managing before. Steve shifted in his lap as much he could, helping Billy along, eyes shut tight as the pleasure became too much.

His breathing was tight and labored, his neck arching as he squirmed in Billy’s lap. Billy’s fingers stayed close to the head, _squeezing_ just right and Steve was coming. Shooting over Billy’s hand and up his stomach and the pillow in front of them. He sagged back into Billy’s embrace.

Billy brought both arms up to hold Steve to him, fucked up into him harder and harder, face tucked into Steve’s neck, breath stuttering over the sensitive skin. He mewled again, pushing Steve forward into the bed, Billy’s arms still wrapped around him, and began to pound into him.

He fucked into Steve so hard they began to inch up the bed. Then, he shuddered almost violently against Steve’s back and came. He was practically gasping for breath against Steve’s shoulder, slowly and gently rolling his hips a little in aftershocks before pulling out and laying next to Steve.

Steve didn’t move from his spot, just turned his head to face Billy. He was flushed red, hair all wild and messy, chest heaving and glistening with sweat. He was so fucking beautiful, Steve wanted to cry.

“I can’t move.” Steve groaned softly.

Billy smiled, turning his body toward him. “Do you want to?”

Steve shrugged best he could. “I don’t know.”

Billy started giggling, which caused Steve to laugh, and soon both of them were cackling. Billy sat up with a smile on his face, “Hang tight, pretty boy.”

He moved from the bed and out the room, Steve really couldn’t move if he tried, his legs felt like jelly. Billy returned with a wet wash cloth and the cool water felt amazing on his heated skin.

“There you go, princess.” Billy said softly with a small smile.

Steve mustered up enough energy to roll over and Billy tossed the dirty pillow from the bed as Steve wiped off the front of himself. Billy laid down beside him once he was done and smirked when Steve couldn’t hide the slight grimace when he moved.

“Oh, shut up.” Steve rolled his eyes at Billy’s smug face.

“I told you what I was gonna do, can’t complain when you knew what was gonna happen.”

Steve tossed his arm out and smushed Billy’s face as he laughed at Steve’s aching bottom. “You’re a jerk.”

“Yeah.” Billy smiled bright and happy as he moved into Steve’s space. “But I’m your jerk.” He ran gentle fingertips over Steve’s face, moving his hair behind his ears. It was painfully sweet. “Can’t get rid of me now.” He whispered.

Steve scooted closer, wrapping his arms around Billy’s sweaty body. “Like I’d ever want to.”

Billy softly ran his fingers through Steve’s hair, unknotting it as Steve curled around Billy’s chest. “Do you really want to?” He asked. “Stay with me?”

“Billy…” Steve sighed, getting prepared to pinch him.

“Like, forever?”

Steve felt Billy’s breath stall, felt his body stay casually still, like Steve’s answer might be the one neither of them wanted. He sat up, laying on Billy’s chest so he could see his eyes. Billy’s hand paused in Steve’s hair.

“Of course.” He said easily. “Not even a question.”

Billy stared at his face, uncharacteristically open. Blue eyes unguarded and tracing over Steve’s tired features.

“So if I wanted to go back to California, you’d come with me?”

Steve nodded, “If that’s what you wanted, yeah. I would.”

Billy paused and Steve felt fingers resume their path through his hair. “And if I wanted to stay, at least until Max graduated?”

“Then we’d stay.” Steve shrugged easily. “Maybe we give Robin one of our rooms if she goes local.”

They were quiet for a while, Steve’s eyes briefly closing as Billy played with his hair, his cheek warm where it was pillowed on Billy’s chest.

“I’m still not sure.” Billy all but whispered.

“That’s okay.” Steve murmured. “We have time to figure it out.”

“You know how much I love you, pretty boy?” Billy whispered.

Steve gently kissed the warm skin in front of him. “I love you too, Billy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story Dustin tells Steve is actually something that happened to one of my friends, I couldn’t resist throwing it in there. As always, feel free to come yell at me over on Tumblr! I love hearing all your thoughts about this story & Harringrove!! I think one more chapter to go... we’ll see what happens since I can’t seem to stop writing this lol

**Author's Note:**

> come yell at me on tumblr! @ellieohno


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